CB - Wedmesday, December 24, 1980 - North Shore News

Wife has lost

QUESTION:

My problem ts how to live with someone you love bat don't enjoy. My wife - especially in the last three years or so doesn't seem to have any feelings what- soever. I don’t mean that in a sexual way, although, that too. She doesn't have any opinions or interests that she ts enthusiastic about. She doesn’t seem to have any likes or dislikes. She's that way about me and our family (her relatives and mine) and other people as well as about our family life “program” and things that other people do to add to the enjoyment of their lives. She's always saying, “It doesn’t matter to me.” She says that if 1 ask her if she'd like to go to McDonalds or to the Vancouver Hotel for dinner - it’s just, “whatever you say”. She has no leanings one way or the other. | don’t think she even gets hungry.

She eats because it’s lunch time or whatever. | can’t tell if she likes or dislikes making love or going for a walk or watching TV or going to church or anything. I love her, bat for all 1 know she hates me, although she never does anything to make me think she hztes me - or loves me for that matter. I asked her about a month ago if she” loves me and she said something like, “certainly | do - why do you think I married you?” She could have said, “I told you I loved you 17 years ago, have you

forgotten?” There was no feeling in it at all. As I say, | love her, but I don't know what's the matter. What can I do?

STEWART:

Don't discount the possibility that she has some sort of physical condition that has contributed to her change during the last three years. Get her to a good doctor for a very thorough physical check-up. Either go with her or have a talk with, the doctor before her ap- pointment. He may find a medical reason for her

her feelings

ask hayden stewart

Freelance Counsellor Hayden Stewart may be reached at 261-6242 for appointments for individual, family or group counselling. His office in the International Plaza Hotel (Open Tuesdays only) is for the convenience of North Shore residents.

condition, or he may want to refer her to a psychiatrist or counsellor.

Meanwhile, see if you can talk with her, not about how she is behaving, but about your difficulues in relaung with her rewardmgly. Let her know that you = are hungry for enjoyment with her and that you are having a very difficult time and need her help in working things out so there will be more fun and pleasure in your home. Decide to get counselling help for yourself and let her know you are doing that.

Crying the weatherman bloopers

QUESTION:

If there were some way of suing the weatherman for malpractice, [Fm sure I would take immediate actidn. They call themselves professional and they are proved wrong time and time again. I can understand them being wrong, but what bothers me is the way they act like they know what they are talking about when time and again they miss out

entirely and then blithely do it again the next day. Any such incompetence bothers me terribly. 1 terribly get lathered up about them claiming to be adequate in their work and then con- tinually blowing it. This is one of the things that the apathetic public seems quite willing to put up with, but I am not. I don't know what can be done, but at least | am voicing my disapproval.

NIGHT SCHOOL NOTES

Will you give some support to my complaints through your column comments?

STEWART:

I havent the = shghtest interest either in the weatherman’'s bloopers. or in your efforts to be a nghteously indignant cry- baby. No, that 1s not quite right. As a matter of fact I am grateful for all the laughs I get out of weather reports

For the more advanced potte

By now you should have seen the nev schure. If you haven't, and want to. phone 985-8741 and ask for one, or be told where you can get one. You probably know, anyhow, that Jan 19 1s the beginning of the winter sessions

If you feel

you ve mastered the basics olf pottery, and are keen on

going further, you'll be glad to hear that there will be an intermediate course olfered This is the me to learn to do that exqutsite glaze you saw someone cise do and pincd to be able to do yourself

For something different, why not learn about “Edible Wild Plants”? Can you

really

imagine anything more truly designed to battle inflavon? only for those who may get host in the woods Some of thase weeds and things arc good. 1 suill remember with fondness the ahghtly bitter piquant Mavour of dandchon greens

ICs) not

but

when | was » hitie girl

nigh

on to all those many years

age Aad there are many

many more you can learn about

“Ritmesns ond Weight

Coaontrob wall come tn very

Comptiete Porsonal

FUR SALES & SERVICE CAPILANO FURS

C aartifierd Viennone bumries tuyane — mbes,

4070 Owibrookh NV

Priease Call 987 27000

handy alter all the shenanigans you engage tn over the holidays. Sponsored by ‘Radiant Living” seminary and dealing with stress management, this will truly) concern

your basic well being, and answer many of

course self to

your questions as to the proper way to “listen to your body” Hf you can spare more

than one night a week oul

l win 159 50

Dcrcatote 224 50

CALLEORA KEE BROCHURE

DOWN COMFORTERS

Goose Down prices valid ‘ti! Dec 31

FULL 1OYPEAR WARRANTY PLUS COMEORT GUARKANTE ft

Wide Selec fon of © olourful © overs

Oordic LOIO EIR STHEE f (at Sed Ave}

why not take this course as well as something more fmvolous? That way, youll have the best of everything for a happy and healthy New Year

But before that. the time has arnmved to wish you all the Christmases

most pleasant of

with = pood

food good fun) and a bit of time here and there to stop and think about it all

(Queen 249 50

Kinny 288 50

731-2311

that go wrong. and | imagine Tl get a few laughs out of your letter once I've got over trying to answer it. Yep. the laughs are coming already' You've got to admit it is something of a scream for a full grown man (or are you a woman’) being “lathered up” over a weather report Perhaps you were being funny all the (me. If so, forgive me for replying as though you were real.

us

A 40 quality architectural & items is now on our floor for sale open Dec

merchandise

The guilt has

QUESTION: The other day I did a thing on the spur of the moment that [ve always thought. was wrong. I have not felt one solitary pang of regret or guilt, except to feel, once or twice that I SHOULD feel guilty. What's happened?

STEWART: Perhaps you have found release from an habitual inhibition that no longer serves a purpose for

gone away

you. You may have discovered you may com- fortably turn your back on some old wives’ tale that is not, after all, as authoritative as you have been assuming. Or perhaps you have deserted a long-time conviction = that may sul be important to you although it does not seem to be nght now. You will know. Listen to your higher self with respect and trust.

All Fabrics

V2 Reg. Price

(S} OS

Dey

Cee aeitene man

Antiques

Grand Opening

Suan. Dec. 2 ist

Mayfair Antiques 1326 Main Street

North Vancouver

ft. container English

Our showroom

21st

and enjoy our

Thank Vou?

sean The bis we canny dan ot... hh

Opeua sd days a week

985-8579

of furniture, collectable

doors are for your pleasure as of Please come and see

SINGER Sewing Centre

980-7913

Zood

fine