I attended a talk recently by Dr. John Izzo, author of the books Speaking from the Inside Out and Awakening the Corporate Soul.

He was presenting to the members of the Canadian Association of Professional Speakers and discussing the fact that the reason most people who attempt to make a career of speaking fail is that they are making speeches they think people wish to hear or speeches they wish to give regardless of whether it fits the audi- ence.

He suggested that the best speakers identify and convey their own unique message to the needs of an audience to which they are qualified to speak.

Aside from the personal development in speaking skills which I accrued in lis- tening to him, he gave me considerable food for thought in the area of my unique message, not just professionally, but as a par- ent.

He told the story of how his dad had died at 36 years of age, when he was just cight, but due to his par- ents’ separation, he had not known his dad well enough to feel the need to grieve.

In his mind, his dad had not left a legacy.

While it may seem tedious to live under this

Centre addresses suicide

ACCORDING to the Vancouver-based Crisis Centre, suicide is the second leading cause of death among youth.

The centre advises that when external changes in a person are a good indicator of internal changes.

* Major changes to look for include: @ Change in situation: rela- tionship losses, disharmony at home, loss of social status, loss of employment, impend- ing discipline, trauma (per- haps from assault or illness). @ Changes in feelings: depression, feelings of worth- lessness, hopelessness, feel- ings of being overwhelmed, even elation. @ Changes in action: increased use of drugs, self- neglect, risky behavior, aggressive behaviour, with- drawal, concentration diffi- culties.

Anyone can call the Crisis Centre distress line at 872- 1811, 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

ture, it is not unrealistic to sit occasionally and ask ourselves what unique Message we will have lett behind, as parents, should we not return home one night.

What will our childrea remember, ¥ i passing, about the person we were, the values we had, the joys we gave

the most significant influence in our children's lives, is it not possible for us to think, each evening, abour what we passed on to them that day, in our thoughts, words and actions?

Even better, is it not pos- sible to think, in the morn- ing, about the message we would like them to remem- ber that day, and then take clear steps to get that mes-

mplest way to leave

a positive message each day is to start or end the day with a compliment, an expression of appreciation or a simple gesture of loving affection.

Focusing these comments

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ON issues Vou tre trying to teach them simply paints a picture in ther mund of where vou are trying to go with them.

Great speakers know what they have to say and spend a great deal or ume preparing to put that Message in terms that will meet the needs of the audi- ence ta whom they are speaking.

For every one minute of speaking, there has been 10 minutes of preparation,

When they have done their job well, they will leave the audience with a legacy, a lasting message that will at the very least touch them, and might, with some inspi- ration, change their lives forever.

Great parents know what they want to teach their children and spend a great deal of ume getting tho: ideas across to their children i that will meet their

When they have done their job well, they will leave children with a legacy, sting message and impresston that will, at the very least, form the core of a family’s love.

With same inspiration the message will change their children’s lives for the better.

— Graham Hookey is the author of Parenting Is A Team Sport and teaches par- enting courses. (209-8784 or ShovkeyEdowco.com)

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