48 - Wednesday, September 15,

Q. MY HUSBAND has had two affairs and ['m afraid he’s having another.

He denies this is true. However, he denied the others until } caught him in the act. Each time I begged him to teil me the treth. And he lied. Not only did he Jie. he ac- cused me of being crazy and paranoid.

Fhen, after the second affair, he told me ii was my fault he had to do things this way. He says I have denied him the right to have an occasional outside ‘‘sexual liai- son*’ which he needs to keep uur married sex life interesting.

Furthermore, fhe says all men need to play around occasionally if they are going to maintain their stamina in the marital bed. Is that true?

A. No, it is not! Tell him, ‘Cut it out or get out!’ If you have the feeling that he’s having another affair, you are probably right. You should not have to spy on him to get the truth.

Sit him down and say, ‘‘l know it’s happening, and I want it to stop.”’ He is subjecting you to the possibility of contracting a sexual- ly transmitted disease.

His thinking does not fit into the realities of our present society. Maybe a hundred years ago a man felt he had to have his “harlots,** but today he can have exciting sex in his own bedroom.

Q. My wife acts like wearing sexy lingerie and letting me per- form cunnilingus are sex treats to

1991 - North Shore News

LIFESTYLES Does he have right to cheat on wiie?

Dr. Ruth Westheimer

ASK DR. RUTH

be reserved for special occasions only.

T love it when she dresses in sexy lingerie for me. I buy her beautiful lacy things. She wears them once — and no more.

Also, she is willing to perform fellatio on me whenever I ask, but most of the time she stops me from reciprocating. When she does let me, she gets very hot. It makes the sex hbetfer for both of us. So why dues she limit us the way she does?

A. Maybe she does consider these things ‘special treats’? as you say. But, she may also believe that wearing sexy lingerie or allowing you to mike oral love to her cheapens the sex somehow.

This is a negative sex attitude some women have learned from their tamilies or rebgious training,

Or maybe she fears sou will think less or her if she allows herself! to beeome uninhibited. Since she gets turned on by oral ser, you Know she likes the espe- rience. She is also willing to do things to please you, so you know she isn't refusing these special treats (0 punish you in same way.

Q. Are there any mea over 50 who wouldn't dump a woman their age for a woman 20 years younger?

For the past six months, I've been seeing a man in bis mid-50s. i'm in my mid-40s. We seemed to have everything, includins great sex. I thought he was comfortable with my professional success.

Then suddenly his career took a downturn, and shortly after that he began seeing a thirtysomething unemployed secretary who lives with her parents.

Fm stitt reeling. 1 feel ofd and undesirable and wonder if (ll ever be interested in another sexual relationship again. Do you think he'll come back to me?

A. 1 don't have a crystal ball, so J can’t tell you if he will ever come back to you.

I am guessing his career downturn has more to do with his sudden interest in this woman than your age does,

Some men still need to feel su- perior in some way to the women they date and even marry.

Sorrell promotes reading for pleasure

From page &7F

cach basic exercises as reading and writing.

“‘Were illiteracy an identifiable disease,’’ writes U.S. Senator Joyce Fairburn, ‘‘it would be judged as an epidemic.”’

Many outspoken Canadian authors have warned of the dangers of illiteracy, but Sorrell’s message has been to promote the world of the imagination through reading for pleasure.

“Obviously it’s deplorable that many people have such difficulty with reading. Even though my family comes from great ig- norance, I believe it’s more im- portant to learn to read for pleasure than to learn to read to just get by. That’s (reading for pleasure) what inspires us and allows us to enter into other peo- ples’ lives. It deepens our sense of understanding of other people and increases our compassion.”? And’ that, says Sorrell, is what makes us grow as human beings.

Sorrell says he doesn’t have a master plan on how to solve the literacy problem. He only hopes

Wolo

Fail Flyer Appearing September 11, 1991

Due to circumstances beyond our control, some of the men's & boyswear items may not be available as featured in our flyer of September 11 Rain checks will not be available on these items.

We apologize for any inconve- nience this may cause.

that his own books will serve as

the door to literacy for others. Sorrell will be at North Van-

couver City Library at 2 p.m.;

Thursday Sept. Sth 5-7pm open house

i

Library at 4 p.m., Vancouver District Capilano

FRENCH LANGUAGE TRAINING

Efficient up-to-date methods All Levels - Adults or school students

STARTING SEPTEMBER 16TH Village Square, suite 2-202, 1457 Marine Drive {above McDonald’s)

Registration - Placement tests

Saturday Sept. 7th 10-12am open house

Saturday Sept. 14th — 10-12

ALLIANCE FRANCAISE

Centre for French Studies INFORMATION: 327-0201 North Shore: Ask for our West Van Chapter

YOUR NEXT CAR OR TRUCK RENTAL

MUST BE PRESENTED AT TIME OF RENTAL.

NOTVALID IN CONJUNCTION WITH ANY OTHER SPECIAL OFFER.

judget

car and truck rental

r I i | { ! 1 | I I I ! i | { I | | { I I i t

West Vancouver Memorial and North

Library on Oct. 3 at 7:30 p.m.

Thursday Sept. 12th 5-7 pm

y

NEWS photo Cindy Goodman

LIONS GATE Bridge as viewed from below on Welch St.

is holding auditions’ for its Student Company September 13th ‘& 14th, 1991;.. at-4:00 (Previous Dance Required -~ Intermediate/Advanced) We are also. taking’ registrations for: our fall session of. classes -in Jazz, Ballet, Tap & Modem. * Guest Teachers: Meribers of Alvin Ailey Company September 14th & 15th

HARBOUR DAN CE CENTRE

** New Class: HIP HOP for Kids Thursdays at 4:30 p.m.

HARBOUR DANCE CENTRE JAZZ * BALLET * TAP * MODERN

927 Granville Street, Vancouver, B.C. V6Z 1L3 % 684-9542

i I i I ! | I I I I ! I I I ! I i i t d

Y nal We feature EJ vehicles

TWO LOCATIONS IN NORTH VANCOUVER

1700 MARINE DRIVE & 1507 MAIN ST. PHONE: 263-5555 NORTH SHORE CENTRAL RESERVATIONS