44 - Wednesday, It’s imp Nosember 22, 1989 - North Shore News LIFESTYLES ortant for parents to discuss sex Q. EF never discussed sexuality with my children, and I find that my daughter is not discussing it with her teenagers ei- ther. I would like to break this family tradition by supplying the kids with some helpful reading matter on the subject. Please forward any pamphiets you have. A. I have no stock of pamphlets for children or teenagers. You will find many trustworthy and reliable books on sex written and edited for young people in decent bookstores and public libraries. Dr. Ruth Westheimer Your daughter may not be receptive to your giving the books to your grandchildren. Grandma sometimes is more open to infor- mation than Mom. Don’t push them on her; show them to her, say that it seems to you to be wise to give young people reliable in- formation when so much harmful misinformation is reaching them from every side. Also suggest that if they see the family offering the information, they may be more open to their adult relatives about their doubts and difficulties, This is important -- for parents to feel the children’s confidence in them, and for the children to have that confidence. If you encounter resistance, just let it be known that you have the books and in your house it is any- body’s privilege ta read them. It often happens that teenagers do not want to discuss sex with elders. They may have the idea that they know about sex, that talking to el- ders is childish, and all you can do is say that really solid information on the subject is valuable and that there is new information for everyone, grandmothers as well as youngsiers, coming out all the time. Keep the books openly in your home, where the resisters will probably nick them up sooner or later. Q. My wife had a heart attack a month ago. How soon can we resume our sex life? We are both senior citizens. A. You want to know something ef medical importance and it is up to you to ask the doctor if your wife won't. I would fet her know you are interested, and maybe she wiil initiate the discussion with her _ doctor. A cardiologist of my acquain- tance tells me that Ke routinely in- structs heart-attack survivors — and other heart patients -- about the best course for them to follow in resuming sex after illness. He does not wait for the patient to speak up on this subject, he says, because most patients ere shy about bringing it up. Other doctors 1 know are shy about bringing it up themselves. Maybe people should curd their impulses to talk sex ia crowded restaurants, but between doctors and patienis on this subject there is still too much shyness. A doctor has many patients, many duties, and may not want to get into sex advice when more urgent medical matters are putting him under pressure. Many physi- cians turn over routine fpost- procedural instruction-giving to nurses or other health profes- sionals. Some patients find it easier to ask a nurse about sex than to ask a doctor. But the subject should be brought up. and the person most affected is the patient or spouse hoping for a return to healthful life. Q. Please stop advising that musturbation is harmiess. It is more stimulating than normal in- tercourse and can ingrain responses that prevent normal sex- ual functioning. A. Modern sexual information is that self-gratification has no effect on normal functioning and often accompanies it, and any uniikely ill effect of i is temporary, usually self-correcting. LOSS? See us for good hearing f aid service — sales, repairs, batteries and advice. ASK ASCUT OUR TRIAL SERVICE. North Western Hearing Centre Open Tues. - Fri. 9:30 - 5 Sat. 9:30 - 1. Closed Mon. 985-5552 1910 Lonsdale North Vancouver "WORTH ¥ANCOUYER FACILITIES & SERVICES EXCLUSIVELY FOR WOMEN * New cardio fttness program » Supervised Programs tor Toning, Trinming isict Body Shaping * Acrobics & No Bounce Aeropics * Relaxing Whutipool ¢ Sonthing Sauna * tilfecycies & Fan Bikes ® individual Lockers * Private: Showers and Dressing Booths * Cushioned Wood Floor © Free Weights Nutritional Guidance *® And much, much more!! HEW ADULT PATAONS ONLY BASED ON 24 GONTHS Li PRICE $356 3 GONVENIENT ‘LOCATIONS! BYRNABY/COQUITLAM 4501 RORTH ROAD 421-6439 RIGHMORD 1445 MARINE DREVE | 7740 ALOERSRIDGE WAY 980-5635 ON SALE at the WAREHOUSE tess ciark or. SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 25th - 9 a.m. to 6 p.m. SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 26th - 9 a.m. to 6 p.m. it's a rare opportunity to SAVE on 100% wool merino DALKEITH... fine imported ANGORA... pure wool BOTANY and MOHAIR styles. in sizes 32 to 44 in a host of co-ordinating colours. All at WHOLESALE and LESS! QUALITY AT INCREDIBLE PRICES, $20 to $60 each for Scottish merino, $40 to $120 each for fine imported cardigans. A great Christmas gift idea! Brought to you by GORDON HUNTER KNITWEARINC., importers of the finest quality cardigans, all fully guarariteed. VISA ¢e MASTERCARD * CHEQUES ® CASH * ALi. WELCOMED ‘ COE era caw wey OM MERE OL