34 - Sunday, June 19, 1994 - Norih Shore News Emily Murphy crisis-line helps those in THE WOMAN'S voice is shaky. It is hard for her to make this call. A concerned friend has given the number to the Emily Murphy House cri- sis line and urged her to phone. By Fran Bourassa Contributing Writer For over a month she has carried the slip in her purse and twice dialed but hung up before it was Answered. She doesn’t know what to say or where to begin. She is sure that her problem is not impor- tant and thinks she may tie up the line for. someone else in “real cri- sis.” a .. She is asked if it is safe for her to talk, if she needs the police. The question takes her aback. It raises her own awareness that danger is present in other women’s lives. Can it be in hers toa? The counsellor asks her ques- tions that make the conversation easy. She is talking now. She tells her story bit by bit. She talks about her concerns and worries about the - relationship she is in. She shares what she has kept secret from so ‘many people. The counsellor assures her that she is not alone or crazy — that other people have been in the same situation. She learns that there are differ- ent kinds of abuse — that not all of it is physical like punching and hit- ting. She learns that being pushed or shoved or held down is also physical abuse. : -. She hadn’t realized that the yelling and name calling — the emotional abuse had done so much damage to her self-esteem. She sees how isolated she has become from her family and friends. . She admits to herself how the need threats frighten her, how the fear immobilizes her and has kept her silent all this time. She understands now that she has choices. This woman’s story is one of the many that counsellors listen to on the crisis line. “They always think you've heard it all before but each time it moves you. The details are always different but the theme is the same.” Women often blame themselves for causing the abuse, or make excuses for it — “he’s under a lot of pressure, he was drunk, he had a rough childhood, he says he’s sorry and says he won’t do it again.” The first cali or contact with Emily Murphy House opens a door for women and their children. “ It takes courage. It takes hard work, but she begins to sée that she is worth the effort and deserves a life free of violence, free of fear, free of abuse. The crisis line is available 24 hours a day, seven days a week. It is totally confidential. It’s the only crisis line on the North Shore and sometimes when the Vancouver Crisis Line is busy, men also call the Emily Murphy House. Many calls are from family members and friends who are con-* cerned for a woman in an abusive situation. They ask how to heip and support the woman. They are told to get the woman to call the crisis line. Sometimes children call, wor- ried and afraid for their moms. More and more people are using the crisis line. The hours have doubled since . 1990. Now staff spend approxi- mately 80 hours a month on the cri- sis line. It can be the first step for a woman and her children into a life free of violence and fear. Pass it on. 987-3374. Coyote’s range has expanded since 1852 From page 33 northern Panama and the south- western margins of the U.S.A. Ina little over a century, it has spread to New England and Alaska and all points in between. Coyote’s remarkable success has been at the expense of its larger cousin, canis lupus, the wolf, whose forest range and big game the white man has spent 100 years 3 reducing. On our heels, in our wagon-ruts, coyote has flourished by expertly exploiting the marginal hunting grounds created by ranches. farms, even cities. Coyotes are flexible, adaptable, tough and “lever; hunt- ing in packs when it works, turning solitary when the range is too poor to support a pack. Not too proud to eat rat, snake or dirt if need be, for those essential survival skills the coyote was remembered, exalted and worshipped by the Nahua peo- ple. The Nahua were warriors, proto- Apaches hardened by the marginal deserts of the Southwest. Like the Mongols under Genghis Khan, they swept south, conquered and were ultimately absorbed by the last great flowering of pre-Columbia civilization in Central America. We call them the Aztecs of Mexico, the people who built and walked the Halls of Montezuma. When they put on the feathers and finery of civilized life, the Nahua never forgot their old friend and desert mentor. Coyote was the totem of one of their great Warrior lodges, venerated like the Eagle and the Jaguar. Even the name sur- vived: coyote is a corruption of coyorl in Nahua, whose complex consonants Spanish conquistadores could not master any better than British tongues could pronounce Coast Salish. An environmental success story, Coyate is even beating his bad press these days. In the mytholo- gies of many Native Amerindian peoples, Coyote is a Promethean “Trickster” spirit, neither good nor evil, who sometimes shares the gift of wisdom with humanity. Native writers like Thomas King have used Coyote as a charac- ter in stories and as a rallying totem for Native artists who must, like Coyote, survive on their wits and courage on the margins of a world not of their making. There were nights on Bewicke Avenue when I was seeing the sun rise for all the wrong reasons and I heard the mocking “Yip, yip, yip— ki-yiti!” of Coyote, challenging the sun and the light-industrial cityscape, proclaiming, “I’m still here and 1'm still free!” I'd go to bed laughing. “. 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