Let the bride wear a wedding gown DEAR MISS MANNERS — I am planning 2 formal wedding and have a dif- ference of opinion with my family — a typical engagement-period land You see, my fiance and I actual- ly kad a very small marriage cere- raony before the Army transferred hira to Germany, where he is now. He will be returning for the formal wedding, and then I will go tc Germany with him. We chose to legalize the rela- tionship when we did for practical reasuns, but both feel that a for- mal wedding ceremony is very im- portant. We want to share the joy of starting our lives together with our family in the traditional way. Whea we decided on this, we were advised on 2 couple of issues by our priest: 1. The formal ceremony will ac- tually be a reconfirmation of the vows, as the Episcopal charch will not allow a second wedding cere- mony for the same people (unless they have been divorced in be- tween). Essentially, the ceremony is the same, with a few changes in wording. 2. He advised us to go public with our married status, so as to S | LIFESTYLES miss manners Judith Martin Bet keep things honest. While I have acknowledged to ali my friends aud family that I am already mar- ried, I have uot started using my husband's name, nor am F wearing a wedding ring. As far as my hus- band and I are concerned, our wedding anniversary will be the date of the formal ezremony. My grandmother and aunt, who are filling the mother role for me how off the world’s most beautiful city on the citys rnost beautiful: + sightseeing tour. Travel up scenic Howe “Sound to Squamish—seven hours of relax- “ation and unparalleled scenery on the ma- jestic -MV “BRITANNIA and. the historic ROYAL HUDSON STEAM TRAIN. and whose opinions I value highly, have held firm on one point — they do not feel it proper for me to wear a formal wedding gown with a chapel-fexgth train, as I am ¢ marrizd woman. The gown I have chosen is not as elaborate as seme, but it’s not simple either. The main point is that I love it and feel strongly about wearing it. I do not want to ignore their feeiings on this, but truly, is there a correct etiquette procedure here? GZNTLE READER — Miss Manners not only takes your side on this question, but, admiring your wish to please your relatives, will endeavor to bring them over to that side. Ladies: We are living in an age when some brides routinely wear a fall regalia for second and third weddings. Others wear it when the children born in the courtship period are in attendance at the wedding. What your granddaughter and niece is suggesting is something very different. She feels herself to have been married by proxy, so to speak. In highly traditional situa- tions where there would be both a civil and a religious ceremony a day apart, the wedding dress was worn for the latter, even though ook now and take your out-of-town guests on the BOAT-TRAIN DAY TRIP. Tour runs May 21-Sept. 24. Special dis- counts for kids, teens and seniors. NCTE: ROYAL HUDSON round trip tickets also available. R HIGHLIGHTS INCLUDE _« Tour is narrated, multilingual guides: Souvenir magazines. e Choose: your route. ROYAL HUDSON departs N. Van. at the B.C. Rail Station, Pemberton Street. The MV BRITANNIA leaves downtown Vancouver, north foot of Denman Street. © Shittle buses return you to your starting point at the end of day. RESERVATIONS REQUIRED ° CALL 687-9558 OR 68-TRAIN WESTERN CANADA, & US.A. . CALL TOLL FREE 1-800-663-1500 | BODY? MIND? SPIRIT? Who are you? Find out — call the Dianetics hotline 1-800-FOR-TRUTH (367-8788) the bride was legally marzied by then. So please let this bride wear the dress she has chosen, with your blessing. Miss Manners sees no question here of a taste violation. HOME-BASED BUSINESS WORKSHOP The North and West Vancouver Chambers of Com- merce are pleased to offer a second workshop to assist entrepreneurs in starting up and successfully - operating a home-based business. Date: Friday, July 7/89 — 6:30 - 9:30pm plus Saturday, July 8/89 — 9am to 5pm Location: Chamber of Commerce offices, 131 E. 2nd Street, North Vancouver Fee: Only $25. for the full eight-hour course, but seating is limited. Registration amd Telephone: Roger Cayford further info: at 921-6105 evenings | 40% off CUSHIONS (Battenburg, cotton, wool, silk, needlepoint) JULY 10-16 15% off FURNITURE Picklepine, twig, wicker, wrought if iron Park Royal South’: 2326, W. 4th. Ave, ‘Van.