‘32 — Sunday, August 23, 1992 - North Shere News

HELP’S AT Hand, by North
Shore Community Services
(NSCS), is a forum for discussing
government policies and pro-
grams, benefits, consumer and
legal rights, taxation and public
services.

Answers are intended only as a
general guide and should not be
applied to individual cases without
further consultation.

Question: A- geod friend of
mine lives with a nan who gets
pretty aggressive towards her. As
far as I know he has hit her once,

| but has promised that it won't

-. happen again.

However,” he really pute her
down in front af. their friends and
- children. I have tried to suggest
- that she leave him, or do some-
‘. thing about it, but she says he will
change and that she loveshim.
-- What can I do to help? I'm
worried about her, but her at-
titnde also frastrates me.

'- Answer: Statistics show that a
-.. woman’ in an abusive. relationship
> Will attempt te. leave it five to
"seven times before making 2 a fi nal
<2 break. |

itis. difficult ‘for ‘those of us

- “who. have .nevet_been ‘in. a similar

:, situation’ to. understand ‘this: We
ask ourselves, why a.woman would

may-~.be. ‘surprising - to: tearn
that:she ‘still loves ‘him, but there
undoubtedly; good times and

of love 1 in the relationship.

inkin; about: ‘eaving the:
. houses and other services around

relat. ynshi your. friend ..

“they hav

ciel +. Mumber is 1-300-
is not'surprising then’ ‘he
betrayed

tive of them leaving the relation-
ship. Cultural, religious, or family
traditions can all play a part in
preventing a woman from acting
in the best interest of herself and
her children.

For women who are financiaily
dependent on their husband’s in-
come, the threat of leaving is even
greater.

She will be asking herself ques-
tions about where she will live,
how she will care for her children
and how she will make money to
ive.

Women who have deen

tolerating abuse suffer from very.

low self-esteem. Because of this,
some women may actually believe
that they do something to deserve
or cause the cruelty and abuse to
happen. In some cases this is what
their partner tells them.

Quite often the abused woman.

will have grown up in. a home
where her mother was abused by
her husband, or where she herself
was abused, and sadly, this is her
understanding of how women are
meant to be treated.

As you can see, there are” “many
factors — both’ social and indi-
vidual —.. working against a
woman wishing to change her sit-

mation. .
Fortunately, there are’ services

in. most communities. that — will
support her in making the changes

= whether they are gradual or
~- immediate.

‘In next week’s column we will
talk about transition houses and
their services.

On the North Shore the North:

Shore . Crisis. Services Society
operates the Emily Murphy House
for battered women. They can be

Teached by calling the 24-hour
crisis line ‘at 987-3374. General
‘inquiries can be“ made through
their office at 987-1773.

The. Victim’s Information Line
can provide referral. to -transition

the : province. The toll-free
842-8468, and
the hours are from. 8:30 a.m. to

.7:30 p.m., Monday to Friday.

This column is prepared. with

“~° financial assistance from the

: Notary Foundation. For more’ in-

sr-- formation call NSCS at 985-7138.

payment.
_ :at time of delivery. 25,000 fre kilometers per
. with §-speed transmission. (Automatic. available at extra cost.) Terms and conditions are’

INFINITI Critics love a .
gripping thriller.

LEASE REAL LUXURY 4 ¢
Until August” 31, 1992 when you lease or |."
purchase a:1992 G20, you*can' have your
choice of one. of the’ following, a Motorola™
cellular phorie, Sony . CD: player ‘or:
automatic trarismission ats no extra charge.

$2000: Down Lease bated on 48 months closed end lease 0.A.C. First month's t & sensrity deposit due

Payment
year. Purchase option available. All applicable nes

: mig a wien you didn't even
tenet Seni od ete le Ord nya the il it's free.

_ Now yoi're i contol cf cals you make and receive wih 4 evolutionary services Cat Digg
Call Return, and Call Sereer. When used wth he ni VISTA 200 phone, you'l save lime an

-Toveezive Cal Display, yo sn sa VTA 0 os eal se, Cal Dispayis
7 pelabeceaibsreeaties a

ta iSitseneee ~ its simple. ts speci but play sho yo cal aumber
when you subscribe to Call Digplay, Pius VISTA 200 logs the last 15 different incoming calls; whether you!
answer the phone or not, providing you with a record cf who calted. dust check your display to see whi: ‘
calied and when, Futly featured with memory buttons, ReGall, ReCial, and much more the VISTA 200

Dn by your Sanna
or cal 800. Ofs- 500.

Hs nnn atl bln tt Raw ala Son Sve ches p25 Rs) 975s) oy
Monthly S00 for Cal Disphay - $6.00 (Res, $10.00 (Bus). Monthly rental for VISTA 200- ba aay $9.25 (Bes). Piast ne eitenat.
_ TIS plover it ai ne VTA arg aera often