36 - Wednesday, August 31, 1994 - North Shore News

From cradle to grave

THE MINNESOTA Chamber of
Commerce recently lauded the waste
management practice of the Crib
Diaper Service of nearby Plymouth.
The company captured and donated
the lint gathered from laundering
250,000 diapers per week to a casket
manufacturer to use in stuffing casket
pillows.

Mexico City, Mexico — During a
recent petty theft trial, a local man
was seated in the public gallery
chewing loudly on a stick of gum.

Eventually, the presiding judge
found the chewing noises intolerable
and called the court security guard to
the bench. “Tell that gentleman to
Stop masticating,” the learned judge
commanded of the guard.

The obedient officer approached
the offending gum chewer, bent to
whisper in his ear, and said, “The
judge says you better take your hands
ut of your pockets.” After a moment
of explanation from the judge, the
trail resumed.

eee

' A men's underwear advertise-
ment on a billboard in Te? Aviv fea-
tures the product with a photo of the
late prime minister Golda Meir, and
the slogan, in Hebrew, “Eventually

PLEASE, AND MAKE. SURE
ITS NOT MoT LIGHT...

LUNATIC FRINGE

Ths 15 A
REALLY GCOD
PEA... LETS
CHANGE tT.

That makes corporate sense.

© Wardo

NEWS OF THE
WEIRD

cater, NESE a
Compiled by A.P. McCredie

we remember those who had balls.”

The Tokyo-based drug firm
Dairin announced last month it
would soon market a pre-meal pill to
make bowel movements completely
odorless.

Although the pill was developed
principally for the health-care market
to improve working conditions for
nurses’ aides, some commentators in

Japan fear that the availability of the
pill for consumers will increase
Japan's obsession with cleantiness.
Psychiatry professor Susumu Oda
said that overreaction to unpleasant
smells is already a cause of unsocia-
ble behavior.

eee

According to two officials of
Kentucky Baptist organizations, 4
recent trend tu move baptisms
indoors was caused primarily by the
increasing pollution of creeks and
tivers.

Said Pastor Dick Verhoose,
“You've got dead animals, you’ ve
got open sewers (that make such bap-
tisms unsafe).” Said Rev. James
Kelly Caudill, “There’s (no nearby
river) fit to baptize a dog in, to be
honest with you.”

A new TV game show set to air
early next year in England and Italy
pits couples who have decided to
divorce against each other, with the
objective of determining how the
marital property will be divided.

Instead of relying on costly
lawyers or counselors, the spouses
answer questions on the air about
each other and their relationship. The
spouse who gives the “better”
answers gets more of the property.

© Val Costantino

ALMOST BE THE COLOR
OFTHIS LADYS BLOUSE.
ONLY UGHTER,

CAN YOU HACKETT?

© Teresa M. Hackett

Meter reading

What do these “meters” measure?

. DOSIMETER
. ODOMETER

ALTIMETER,
. PENTAMETER

. HELIOMETER

ODONAM awn =

. MANOMETER
. PERIMETER
. ANEMOMETER

. SPHYGMOMANOMETER
. OYNAMOMETER

. HYGROMETER
. TACHOMETER
. DIAMETER

. CALORIMETER
. TAXIMETER

. AUDIOMETER
. CLINOMETER
. BAROMETER

. PHOTOMETER
. MICROMETER
. VOLTAMETER

. CHRONOMETER
. SPECTROMETER

. THERMOMETER

. DRUNKOMETER

. Light waves

, Atmospharic pressure

Radiation

Tamperatura

. Abarder or boundary

=, Quantities of heat

. Poatic verse

Time

Revolutions per minute

Distance traveled

Electric current

Minute distances

. Alcohol in the breath

Wind spaed

. Machanical force

Blood prussure

Distance above saa level

Cab fare

Pressure of a fluid

Humidity

|. Light intensity

Distance acmss a circle

, Angies of incination
Hearing ability

Y. Distance between
heavenly bodies

ZN EE G-2S MNS K-08 USN BE ALA LL

es aid

SOAMDOVOREr ALE -TOMNMIODpy

x=

: 4 . “ ese Ty
SAGE OWE AEE NSE BBE SOL EB FAB Od “9 50S “Ve THEE RS tod

No. 67

Tereza M. Hackett

THE UNITED Way wants everyone to Tug on Down to
Lonsdale Quay o1: Sunday, Sept. 11 for its annual fundrals-
ing event. From 1 to 3 p.m., there wifl be arts, entertainment
and marine-theme children’s activities. Pictured here:
Marina Bailey of Shaw Cable (second tram left) with (left to
right) Tim Sommer, Lori Johnstone and David Bernard of
the United Way. For more information, phone 294-8929.

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