_* HAYDEN: At this point in :
‘her letter, the writer gave _
7 a rather lengthy “‘back-

- ground’’. Her. husband, a

~ year ago lost his well-paid
~~. executive job in Montreal, .-
through no. fault of his —

ee months, with four teonag go.

: "tremendous ‘pressure for.

own. Unemployed for six —

him. Bie» underwent — a

“complete |

reomality. : . .

ry supportive, WAYS.

oe ee to the letter.)

_ Stewart may be reached . at

261-6242 for appointments for"
family ° or’ group :

individual,
counselling. ae
His new office In. the ‘Plaza,
International ‘Hotel - [open :

Tuosdays. only} Is for the |
convenience of North. Shore 4

- ‘residents.
. IIL yt,

Talkkwithsister
beforetattling”

. QUESTION: © My younger
sister, aged 16, Is Into a very
scary thing that has me sek
with worry for her. She Is
- doing an illegal thing that Is
" dangerous to, her health and
happiness and ‘hor while _
fatwre and also harmful to
other people. My parents
have no Idea this is going on
and I think they should know, -
but we have always hated
- tatiling on cach other and my

parents do not like us to be

taiiiexs, IMiy. aleter fs mot.
aware I know. What should
do? I’ve thought of calling in |
the police In the hopo ‘they.
would jast give her a scare
‘and a warning. I love my kid
‘sister and I just can’t stand.
sooing her heading towards a
very very unhappy future.

STEWART: I believe you
- would feel better if you |
talked with your © sister

‘Freelance. ‘Counsellor. Hayden -

2 My- -question -is,- ‘WHAT'S |

En E inexplicable
ofte occurs foll

THE MATTER WITH ME? I

penn ean Ba” i aH en
wennn Ad °

Gewnis oy.

mayoens. S

~ together’ ins ‘spite - of my. aD
- husband’s commitment. On

. the surface...i ama typical, sia be ‘kiddin ourself. .
happy, suburban housewife. : Fae
‘So how come I feel betrayed, -

: discontent and ewes |

ms a aga, and stations
soe ats Naa Gy Seasus Cuuaeeei

‘Keeping: your unhappy feel-

ings from the one you lov is.
«fe treat. him: am :

e “that -you - ~“need* ‘his hee
1 Provide him swith that sort of

rs, 2s Perhaps. you are still j dging

- endets,. suchas. teac

For: ‘the: first time. in

im - him and if you are, it is:ve

. Giffieult to: receive. him

: Pp. ‘heautiful « exactly where.

éa. aay ee fnterests ef . :
the adult: ed - programme ‘

7 which I enjoyed : so much." :

i eomatea Sretnet

ty" to. hurry: ‘yourself. oat of
your. slump! Instead, admit -

’.-you.are in one (as you. ‘have i ‘in.

. in: 15 e
‘oars, I go ‘back to. bed: after

your letter) and. give youself a

: QUESTION: My man: : and Ie

' have’ a wonderful: relation-.,

each. other... We. are so
securely at home. with each
other-.as friends,: lovers, :
conversationalists, and social:

mutual enjoyment...
‘fete Hest ead By. miles, it

your concern to your: parents

or the police. Let her, know of.

your worry, and concern and

of your love,:.rather than just ~

-being critical of her. She may

listen to you and get out of 44 he done” if you think that :

_ out with honesty.

her mess. If you feel that you ~
are not getting anywhere
with her, tell her that you are
‘willing to blow the whistle on
her by talking to your.
_parents, or perhaps even the!
‘police. Let her know you do

fiot? want to do that, but’.
‘ rather. than letting her get.
_sticked in more deeply, it is —

your intention to do SOME-
THING. Let her know you are
not sure WHAT you will do
but that after you have
thought it over for 24 hours,
, you are going to do what you

can. She may be impressed |

by a non-tattler being willing.
help. -

¢

ship. We just seem to “fit” . b : . ae
“1, Suppose you-were waiting f for _ : oa

.. the “‘but?] The. but: is, about’ &

his wanting to continue his

ot friendships.

partners. There is a great. : en. tha:

These ‘nothing “wrong ‘with, :
the best neladenalte uf hiave: a ,

“affairs? he:is having, but

- whathe is ‘doing is: threaten-:

ing, oun, love. .Why. should he.
have. other:

| afraid that what he ts doing la”

What's to ‘be done? wes

* grew ART |
_ yourself before. passing ‘on this: {Is what he is doing.’
going to ruin. what we have,”

-or is my reaction to it going’.

' Pd like to hug them. How
got that started? -

STEWART: By: wanting to,
to tell ‘all. in order to be of .

with » i
that: ‘he, has. known |

his: "behaviour, these are not

i: -

friends?’ Pm

going to rain what we have. _

‘Ask’ yourself q

to ruin what we have?”’ I was,
going to add some more, but:
believe you'll find :“‘what's

Arms neoded |

for hugging ©

_ QUESTION: Pima 14 your
old gitl, In. our familly there's

wo hugging and wot much  f
touching. Some of my friends
families are not like that. I'd. §
Ike. to be hagged: by. my |
mother and my father, |

you have already started the
change. Now the arms.

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