Ci2-Sunday News, September 14, 1980 Life itself, isa series of miracles QUESTION: [ve been wondering about an answer you gave to someone who wrote in and asked if you believe in miracles. You gave a strange answer, in my way of thinking. I don't have your answer before me bat you said something like, “No, I don't believe in miracles, but I continually bank on them”, I don't know if I have it properly remembered, but that’s the idea I got from your answer. Would you say a little more on the subject? STEWART: I think you're pretty close to what I wrote. I have a strange feeling that when you say you BELIEVE in miracles they can no longer be miracles. Yet, I feel that when I breathe or eat, or smile (or whatever) the chain of events that follow are cach and every one, sheer miracles. Away back in 353 A.D., St. Augustine is reported to have said, “Miracles are not contrary to nature, but only contrary to what we know about nature’. Lost sex drive? QUESTION: My problem is sexual. Pat binntly, I have quite lost any interest in having sexual relations with my husband. After 13 years, J am content to go without sex altogether. The only reason I would like to change the situation § is because I am aware it is not fair to him. This condition has developed gradually over a period of two years. Before that, everything was fine. Do you think a sexual problem like this can be handled satisfactorily? STEWART: It is more than fikely that you do not have a “sexual problem” at ail. Granted, there may be some physical cause for your change, but that is less likely than two or three other reasons for it that come to mind. One is that you may have taken the marriage for granted and have not bothered to do any growing, in the relationship and in your own life. Another is that you may have become judgemental of your husband without trying to “sort things out”. By far the most likely réason is in the possibility that you have turned against yourself. Are you judging yourself harsh- ly? Are you down on yourself for some reason that is important to you? Altogether apart from your sexual ineptitude, is there some reason you may even feel that you are hardly worthy of love and af- fection? Try to find answers to those questions. If you have trouble with them, proceed to arrange for counselling. You do not need to be as you describe yourself, nor does your husband nced to be without your joyous manifestation of your love. DRESS FOR SUCCE Wed. 7:30 to 0:20 pm. starting September 24: 10 veaclonn Fea: $44 Lynnmour Centre NC 210 ». Are you dresaing for Failure: This course is aimed at: 4. providing women on their way up with guidance for. -an-the-job dressing so that they can achieve that look “. @f success when lob hunting, being interviewed for. “promotion or trying to create a positive image. You + will tear the secret of crosa-shopping. the art of : accessorizing and the ps ychological impact of colour, . - Find out bow to put together a total took that spells f SUCCESS for youl. instructor: Linda Princle For Registration and information Call 986-1911 local 321 Capilano conege 2085 Purcell Way North Vancouver § ask hayden stewart Decide Freelance Counsellor Hayden Stewart may be reached at 261-6242 for appointments for individual, family or group counselling. His new office in the Internauonal Plaza Hotel (Open Tuesdays only) ts for the convenience of North Shore residents. If we describe everything we don’t understand as MIRACLES, then my life is a constant experiencing of one miracle after another. e¢© Our 33rd Birthday Celebration Gol ab 5 Doors Open Monday 9a a as » Fab QUESTION: I enclose an article from the NEW WOMAN magazine which is very provocative. It speek approvingly o I quote from it: “...to count on introductions to meet a man, is, for a girl, like depending on the lottery for making a living.” It goes on to point out that many men, involved in lots of activities may still drop in at a Singles Bar now and then, hoping to meet someone nice for friendship and that anyone who thinks that Singles | Bars are just for “instant sex” just hasn't been to any. Having been (with friends, honest) to a local Legion, I've found them. to be‘ friendly (strangers ask for a dance, for instance) withoat being loud or coarse. Your comments please. Do you think Singles Bars are a good or should a girl join a golf club instead? STEWART: Singles Bars (and Golf Clubs) are neither good things or bad things in themselves. Their worth depends on who the person is who goes to them and what her purpose is in putting herself within reach of what they offer. The same can be said of a church or a library or a_ pool hall. > GOLD’S FABRICS Sansibly Priced. 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