44 - Wednesday, October 30, 1991 —- North Shore News ‘LIFESTYLES Husband’s request draws negative reaction Q. RECENTLY I told my wife about the fantasies I have of her masturbating. I suggested it would get me re- ally turned on if she would actually masturbate for me. She got extremely upset, ‘‘No way!"" she screamed before bursting into tears. And now she thinks | am crazy and abrormal. I don’t see how I could be. There is nothing wrong with masturbetion. My question is this: is she crazy and abnormal for go- ing cff on me Sike she has? A. There is nothing wrong with either one cf you. She isn’t crazy or abnorns:' because she isn’: comfortable with your fantasies or the idea of masturbating for you. And there is nothing wrong with you for being aroused by these fantasies or wanting to waich her masturbate. What you did wrong was open your mouth! You should have known ahead of time that she wouldn't like to hear what you had to say. Satisfy your desires by reading sexually explicit material, in- cluding the men’s magazines. Fill your mind with the most fantastic images —- of 10 women miastur- bating, if you like. But don’t tell her about it. If I were you, I would say to her, “Honey, 1 was only kidding. | heard some guys talking about “that in a bar (or at work) and. I decided to pretend it was me. I just wanted to get your reaction, I'm sorry I upset you. It really wasn't me.’’ Maybe she will have her doubts, bui she will probably be eager to accept such an explanation. And, in the future, don’t bring up Dr. Ruih Westheimer ASK OR. RUTH masturbation again. Q. I am a man in my early 20s, and I have only been with three women sexually. F enjoyed the sex and had no performance probiems. They scemed to enjoy it too, but I don’t know if I gave them orgasms or not.. ’ They all said, “‘Oh yes, it was fine.”’ But how do you know? I want. to be sure I have given a woman an orgasm. Is there some way a man can know that he has? I want to be 2 good lever for the women whe will be my sex partners in the future. A. A man can never be sure. A Association seeks volunteers THE CANADIAN ‘Diabetes Association relies on volunteers year-round for: everything from beard~ membess to raffle ticket sellers. During November, which is Diabetes Month, the need for volunteers more than triples as the residential campaign mobilizes thousands of volunteers across Canada to canvass deor-to-door. The campaign is the associa- tion’s single largest project, . rais- ing funds for research into the causes, treatment, and prevention of ‘diabetes, as well as for educa- tion and service programs for people affected by the disease. There are many opportunities for volunteers to assist with the residential campaign. For those who want a short-term commit- ment, there’s canvassing for two or three hours. And for volunteers looking to develop and utilize their organizational abilities, there are positions as zone leaders and district leaders. Organizers say, ““However ‘you choose to become involved, you'll get the satisfaction of knowing that you’re helping the one million Canadians with diabetes, and br- inging us closer to a diabetes-free future.”’ For more information on vol- unteering call 732-1331. NEED MORE STORAGE SPACE? LET ORTH VANCOUVER FALL SPECIAL ON NOW 10% OFF SELECTED SIZES WITH THIS AD. Offer subject to availability. New rentals only, Cannot be used in conjunction with any other discounts, Expires Nov. 3/91. Visit the Narth Shores ecologically friendliest mini storage today. Office Hours: 219 MACKAY ROAD, NORTH VAN ¢ V7P 3N6 ean-dpm" {Behind Capliano Mall) 988-4699 MonFrt, gam-Som weekends woman can be such a magnificent actress that any man would be fooled. If she says, ‘'I’m satisfied,"’ you should take it at face value. Don't worry about it! Women have to assume some of the sexual responsibility too. It is not up to the man alone to make good sex happen. Instead of worrying about whether your partners have an ‘ orgasm or not, concentrate on making lovemaking enjoyable for both of you. I think you shouid look for 4 woman you truly love and build a good relationship with her, rather than striving to give orgasms to many different women. Q. I am a single mother, age 40, of two kids, ages 10 and 12. I 18.2 Cu. Ft. GE For the Budget Minded @ Simple, Family size storage that covers ail the bases. @ 2 Everwhite, full width, adjustable wire , shelves. S Large, useful utility bin. @ Reversible doors to suit any kitchen. am an active, attractive profes. sional woman who has been divorced for three years. Until recently, I have not met 2 man in whom | had a sexual in- terest. But now I have. i want to have a relationship with this man and I know very soon I will have to deal with the issue of him spending the aight. I don’t want ta upset my kids, but I do want to have a sex life. How do I handle this? A. If you want a relationship with this man, he should be able to spend the aight with you in your home. Be honest with your children. Don’t try to hide what you‘re do- ing by sneaking him out of the house in the mornings five minutes before they get up for breakfast. Say to the children, ‘‘Adults do need a friend in bed to hold and to talk to.”’ I'm not saying you should make passionate love in front of them. The bedrcom door should be locked. I would also not advocate bringing many men home, but you have not done this. You have been a responsible parent and you are entitled to a ‘sex fife. I suggest that the first time you have sex with him, you stay at his place or in a hotel, even if you can’t spend the night. . . You need to feel uninhibited. ~ : ‘And, the two of you need. a o private time in which to’ establish a sexual relationship. COMPETES. For price and service, we don't believe you'll do better on G.E. appliances than at Combined Appliance Centre. Before taking a long trip.to the U.S., check with your neighbourhood professionals at Combined. : Lexan 21.7 Cu. Ft. GE Side-by-side 4 399 Solves Your Space Problems y 5 Special sealed snack-pack storage of clear @ 3 full width tempered glass, adjustable cantilever shelves. @ Sealed vegetabie/fruit pan of clear Lexan ®, pilus Lexan ® meatpan with adjustable temperature. @ 4sturdy door sheives (2 adjustable). GE White-on-White, 1 Cu. Ft. Microwave Oven with Probe Cool Value on This 18.2. Cu. Ft. Refrigerator From GE! 89S # 1 full width and 2 split adjustable sheives give you plenty of storage options. @ 2 vegetable/fruit pans and 1 seaied meat pan Keeps food fresher, tonger. @ Reversible doors to fit any floor pian. @ 100 Minute Timer. @ Time Cook 1 & 11. @ Whole Meal Cooking Shelf. w Auto Start, Auto Defrost, Auto m@ Time of Day Clock. @ 600 watts. Roast/Simmer, @ Electronic Cooking Controls @ 10 Power Levels. § 4 9 9 @ Guide & Cookbook. At your Authorized ¢.z. Saies, Service & Parts store: