MY friend Chris is a
great source of amuse-
ment for me.

He's also brimming with
great driving stories and sub-
sequently, great column
ideas.

To wit:

Chris avoided his
umpteenth car crash the
other day as he drove home
from work. He had taken the
eastbound exit from Highway
1 (the Upper Levels) io
Lonsdale Avenue. Showing
great foresight, Chris planted
himself in the right-hand lane
since he wanted to make a
left and head north up
Lonsdale and then a nght
turn off Lonsdale farther up.

A lert turn from a right
lane, asks you? But of course,
responds Shaun.

The off-ramp at Lonsdale
(eastbound) is avo lanes wide
and both lanes are designated
left turn lanes. The placement
of ewo turn lanes is designed
to aid far-thinking drivers like
Chris in arriving at a destina-
tion with as little lane chang-
ing as possible.

But that’s not the end of
the story. Also ar che intersec-
tion of Lonsdale and the east-
bound off-ramp are erected
two traffic lights, in series, of
the typical solid red, yellow
and green variety.

Additionally, there is a
solid green arrow which
accompanies the left-most
green light reminding drivers
of their left turn right-of-way.

The arrow is redundant
and, as it turns out, meaning-
less to at least one bonehead
driver Chris had the near-mis-
fortune of meeting.

There are also lane-desig-
nation signs on this off-ramp.
Four of them, nwo signs for
each lane (redundant again,
one would think) which
direct traffic on said ramp to
possible destinations. The
right lane Chris had planted
himself in has both a sign
above, printed white on
black, making it regulatory,
and a road marking — also
white on black. The two
identical signs contain arrows
pointing both straight and to
the left.

To Chris, and to any nor-
mal driver, these arrows indi-
cate that a drive may turn left
to Upper Lonsdale (which
puts one in the northbound
curb lane when the turn is
compicte) or a driver may
proceed straight through the
intersection heading towards
St. Georges Avenue or back
onto eastbound Highway 1.

If Chris wanted to turn
right and head south down
Lousdale he would have
made a quick fane-change
into the nifty little right-rurn
pocket designed for just such
a purpose — but that’s not
the direction this topic is
heading.

Now, the left lane on this
eastbound off-ramp at
Lonsdale has an overhead
sign that is an arrow pointing
co the left and an arrow
painted on the ground point-
ing to the left. That's it. Left.
Not Straight. Not Right.
Left.

To horribly belabor the
point: Drivers, bonehead or
otherwise, simply MUST
TURN LEFT onto Lonsdale

signak

when driving in this particu-
lar lane.

Chris and T have deduced
thar there are a few poop-for-
brains motorists who think
that a solid green light
informs drivers that they may
go straight. Ir doesn’t. A
green light means a driver
may proceed (only after yield-
ing to all others already in
ihe intersection) bur such a
motion is “subject to 2 sign
or signal prohibiting 3 left or
right turn, or both or (and
here’s the relevant part) a
sign designating the turning
movement permitted.” (See
Section 132(1}(a)(i) of the
mighty Motor Vehicle Act.)

Get it? A green light
means go where you're told.

As you've probably
deduced by now, Chris was
nearly T-boned by some dork
blasting straight through a

RCHASE 4 TIRES AND RECEI

Friday, October 24, 1997 ~ North Shore News — 33

morth shore news

f AU
Paranoid behavior p

designated left-turn-only
lane. This kind of T-bane-
head behasior happens a lot
on the mean streets of our
fair shore. And there are
many dual-turn lanes where
drivers can show off their
boneheaded prowess.

Chiis, fortunately, went
way beyond the call of nor-
mal driving duty by checking
to see if there was a bone-
head nearby before executing
his left turn. There was. Chris
avoided a collision and the
bonehead avoided reality.

Folks, any road sign paint-
ed black on white or white
on black (and the road itself
is considered ‘black’) is a law.

No ifs ands or boneheads
about it. Drivers simply
MUST do what these signs
say. That said, here’s the real-
itv: Boneheads will be buone-
heads. Boncheads often crash
into other boneheads and/or
good drivers.

Great drivers, however,
knowing the nature of the
bonehead, avoid many a crash
simply by being on the look-
out. When vou are driving
there is nothing wrong about
beiag paranoid- evervbody IS
out to get you!

Nice driving, Chris. Way
to be safe.

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