Lifestyles_ Poo ed-out male still has sweet dreams Q. My husband has a grueling job with irregular hours and often little sleep. We do have sex about once or twice a week but both of us would iike it more often. He is 26, I am 23. Recently he had a wet dream. I thought guys who were married and having sex did not have these. What's going on here? A. Nothing for you to be alarm- ed about. A wet dream is some- thing that happens to a man. He does not plan it, and while it is usually associated with periods of sexual inactivity it definitely does by Ruth Westheimer happen sometimes to the most sexually active men. The stimulating images dance willy- nilly into the sleeping brain, the man is aroused and although asleep, he ejaculates and wakes up almost simultaneously. Don't pry into his dreams, but comfort yourself with this: married men definitely have had such dreams about their wives! But even the most faithful man has no con- trol over his thoughts while asleep and neither he nor his wife should worry about these natural occur- rences. There is something that you should give serious thought to, however. When the partners can’t be together on a regular schedule they have to protect their intimacy, plan to be together and be well- rested, plan to make the most of the time they do have to share. Whether you can be together in the morning, afternoon, twilight or midnight, see to it that you really are together and alone. You should know that lovers will go to absurd lengths to plan meetings; some- times married people have to do that too, to protect their precious sharing of their sexuality, Co Q. fam 19 and Iam int) “ed in losing my virginity, but I don’t want a disease and I want to avoid pain. I want to do it on a vacation as I don’t like the idea of attemp- ting it on a one-night stand. Is there any agency through wiich I can hire someone to do this for me? I am tov shy to meet someone on my own. A. There is no such agency - thank God! Let me point out right away that what you are telling me wad asking me contains a danger- ous self-contradiction. You are afraid of disease, yet you want to hire semeone who will be willing to take away your virginity at your convenience. If you fear infection you should certainly avoid a lover-for-hire! Bui there is another reason, even more important, for giving up this git 45 ~ Wednesday, October 14, 1987 - North Shore News “ROSEMARY CHRISTIE MCPA | CHARTERED PHYSIOTHERAPIST § ® Home Visits Assessment Treatment Exercise Mobilization absurd idea. Nobody, man or Massage Rehabilitation woman, should forgo the wonder- Ggsat nie : 925-2806 ful experience of having that first pA RCCL SAE EN I CINE sexual encounter with someone beloved. Having the first sex with a surrogate is totally inadequate - especially for someone 19 years of age. What is the rush to become an ex-virgin? What if you have to wait a while until someone who is right for you comes along? What is wrong with the age of 25 for that experience? What you have to do is get counselling or psychotherapy to help overcome your shyness, to deal with your feeling that you can’t meet someone suitable and form an attachment the way other people do. This is your real pro- blem, not being a virgin. Because losing one’s virginity may have disappointingly little effect on one’s life, but learning self-con- fidence, learning that other people can find one att-active and a good companion always makes a big improvement. See us for good hearing aid service — sales, repairs, batteries and advice. northwestern hearing centre 1910 Lonsdate North Vancouver Open Tues.-Fri. 9:30-5 Sat. 9:30 1. Closed Mon. Save 25% on * VAL-ABEL Drapery fabrics and sheers * JACKSON drapery fabrics, sheers and bedspreads Choose from assorted colors and patterns Capilano Draperies : : 1641 Lonsdale, NV. 988-5621 | SO ENC EES Ve most enjoyable The shopping experience of your life.