3 4 HT Doug Collins ON THE OTHER HAND JHE BRAVERY displayed "by the military experts of the janedia is breath-catching. If “words were buliets there * would be peace in our time. They are particularly bold “where sending cthers to African ; and European hell-holes is con- * cemed. - Yes, let’s go to Yugoslavia, or | What used to be Yugoslavia ‘and is ‘now Serbia, Croatia, Bosnia- » Herzegovina, and for all I know «Macedonia as well, it being very “difficult. to keep track of chess * boards on which the squares keep . changing. . Are the Rwandans knocking one :another off at a record rate? ‘Something must be done. And = much though we'd like to bring all the Hootsies and Tootsies to « Canada so that they can go on wel- fare and hack one another to bits _nere it doesn’t seer on. ; Not until the Liberals get enough planes fuelled, anyway. . Is there trouble in Ethiopia? Let’s go there. Is there trouble in Somalia? We'll go there, too. And - no matter that naked and dead & Ask about our and we'll give you this elegant pen. \ FREE. Bi 1457 Lonsdale Ave., Phone: 980-2451 ‘Freedom a bloody business for UN Yanks have been dragged through the dust to the cheers of those who didn't want to be saved fram them- selves. Is there a dictator in Haiti? We must go there so that he can be replaced by another dictator who says he will be a goad boy. It’s true that the good boy believes in “necklacing” but nobody’s perfect. It's also true that the folk in Haiti have been murder-bent from the beginning. In the early 19th century they rose against their French masters and killed the lot. Thus was the great nation of Haiti brought forth, complete with the begoggled Ton-Ton, Papa Docs, eye-gouging, and knives up the bum for those who didn’t like freedom. Some oppression is good, you see, and some bad. But if it’s white, it’s unspeakable. So it’s a good thing that the French were carved into little bits and eaten. It’s therefore ironic that the French have now sent “peacekeep- ers” to Rwanda. But that’s differ- ent. They've gone because the French editorial writers and other sigh merchants were wringing their hands like mad, determined to save Hootsies and Tootsies who are devoted to death. How many trouble spots are there? More than enough to keep our worriers worried. But wasn't the UN designed to make everyone happy ever after? Wasn't the End of Empire designed to do the same? What went wrong? At last count, “peacekeepers” were either in or had been in 15 countries from the Western Sahara (if that is a country) to Liberia, Lebanon, Mozambique, Cyprus and the above-mentioned Haiti. As in the Book of Jeremiah, they say, Peace, peace, when there is no peace. Whether the non-peacekeepers are still in Haiti, | don't know. I seem to have heard, though, that we sent the RCMP to that blessed plot a while back, only to see them beat a strategic retreat 10 minutes later. Meanwhile, the hippy president of the dis-United States, which itself could do with a few peace- keepers, is still thinking about “armed intervention.” Why do we have all these hiss- ing snakes of countries? One reason is Uhuru. Freedom. The result is that the very liberals who destroyed the empires of yes- teryear are now sobbing and moan- ing in favor of law and order. We shoulda stayed. Then the natives wouldn’t be so restless and there wouldn't be so many daft edi- torials. For although the locals may Free Initial Consultation Douglas W. Lahay - CLARK, WILSON BARRISTERS & SOLICITORS 800-885 West Georgia Street, Van. . 687-5700 a 24 HOUR MESSAGE 643-3161 : ICBC’s policies are not law. I will get | you a fair settlement or trial award. enna most powe! work for you. Introducing the Asian Growth Fund. Invest in a mutual fund powered by Asian growth, and put the thriving economies of Hong Kong, Taiwan, Singapore, South Korea, the Philippines and Australia to work for you. For investors seeking the high-return potential of utual funds, the Asian Growth Fund represents a truly ique opportunity for portfolio diversification and ital growth. he fund is managed by Wardley Investment vices (Hong Kong) Limited. 2 member of the BC Group, based in Hong Kong, with ices throughout this exciting region and arly 20 years of fund management erience. fo find out more and to receive your Free Pen, visit your local Hongkong Bank of Canada branch, call 1-800-665-9993, or complete the coupon. N. Vancouver 1578 Marine Dr, W. Vancouver nn I Wednesda not have liked the whites that much they hate one another, The Pakistanis can't stand the Indians. The Sikhs can't stand either the Hindus or tie Pakistanis. That's why they have all moved to Canada and now can't stand the Legions. T suspect they can't stand the rest of us, either, ex spt at free lunch time. So pretty soon we too will need a few peacekeepers. Maybe the Haitians wil] volunteer? KEN BAXTER - LAWYER 24 Years Experience There are other reasons for the col- lapsing walls of Babylon. Like jobs for the boys. Everywhere you look, throats are being slit in the name of full employment and tribal rigt:ts. Nothing deters the armchair strategists, however. “The world must intervene in Rwanda,” states the editorial in The Vancouver Daily Idiot. But can the Ethiopian change his skin, or the leopard his spots? LONSDALE QUAY | NORTH VANCOUVER 988-6321 DRAPERIES BY S. LAURSEN y & SON ek CUSTOM BEDSPREADS, TRACKS AND VALANGES Labour $8.50 per panel unlined, $9.50 lined. 3 2, GUSTOM DRAPERIES & BLINDS At low, low prices. For FREE Estimates call 987-2966 (Ask about Seniors’ Discounts) Serving the North Shore for 23 years Pe er ees the Asian Growth Fund. Fax to: 1-800-661-0103 VSH 364 Name: Address: City: Pastal Code: cone SE - - ~ - OYES, send me information on O YES, have a Hongkong Bank Securities Inc. representative call. 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