You make us the scorn of our neighbors; and the enemies laugh among themselves. Restore us, O Lord God of Hosts. YES. RIGHT enough. Especially when such a Biblical quotation is found in a United Church pamphlet that also preaches against free trade and privatization. We all know God is dead, of course. He was pronounced so by churchmen in the Sixties. But sometimes he is resurrected and compelled to serve certain causes. He has been made to serve such a change of direction: “Be it resolved that the Van- couver Presbytery of the United Church...strongly urges that no action be taken...unti] such time as a full and complete discussion has taken place.” ( M ohammaad) was picked for the attack on the Israeli plane, he said, because his bosses ‘needed someone who had an educated background and could explain a3) _ everything. abortion, anti-abortion, im- migration, sexual equality, crime and criminals and fairies. So . why not free trade anc. privatiza- tion? Today, after all, God's an- ointed are politicians, and free trade is in the catechism. ‘The centurion and.his soldiers missed a great opportunity at the crucifixion, you know. They should have asked: ‘What's your position on free trade, Jesus? And will privatiza- tion really help your servants, ‘especially your civil servants?” Not that I'm getting at the United Church, you understand. Anglicans and Roman Catholics also bow to Mammon, But the pamphlet of which I speak was given to members of St. David's United Church and Others, and had a headline that read: “Some Action Taken By Van- couver Burrard Presbytery. This statement followed: “Whereas the Prime Minister of Canada, during the 1984 elec- tion, campaigned clearly and em. phatically opposed to free trade (sic) and therefore has no man- date to commit our nation to “What do you think of that one, Jesus?’? my centurion would ask. ‘‘Ain't it simply dreadful, this free trade thing? And what about Canadian culture?"’ “You make us the scorn of our neighbors,’’ said Jesus. Whereupon he gave up the ghost. xk w* * It wouldn't surprise me if the churches got up a big petition for that Palestinian terrorist Ot- tawa is trying to deport. He is on the way to becoming a media hero, and is being written up as just one of those little sheep that went astray. He was treated reverently on The Journal, which in left-lib terms is as good as being knighted. The Globe & Mail lov- ed him too and deferred to his demand that he be interviewed by a Paki reporter. He says he is sorry about that hijacking, and even more sorry that someone had to be killed. He promises not to be naughty again. He was simply “‘living out the violence of his childhood dreams,’’ thus giving joy to all "PRESENTING Nu « Life Vitamin Day Come and meet TED JOHNSON ; the Nu« Life Vitamin Expert life SPECIAL NOTE NueLife Vitamins will be on sale for the entire month of February . ay Canadian shrinks. No doubt they too will pull an oar for him. Yes, Mr. Mohammad is a fine candidate for landed immigrant status. He ‘‘hungered for educa- tion’’ and went to Egypt to at- tend university. He was picked for the attack on the Isracli plane, he said, because his bosses ‘‘needed so- meone who had an educated background and could explain everything.”” Which he is doing. He came here to stay, he assured us. Of course. Don’t they all? Especially if they lied their way in. x ke More cause for happiness. The Tory government has given Simon Fraser University $19.25 million to set up a “university development pro- ject’ in the Eastern Islands of Indonesia. Mary Collins signed the deal on behalf of Monique Landry, the French fem in Ottawa who hands out a lot of our dough that way. Collins got her face in the pape. and seemed to be very pleased with what she was doing. Why? kt Ww * The Vancouver Sun says there are 360,000 pcople in B.C. who cannot read or write. Yes, And many of them are working for the Vancouver Sun. x k& oF To the watering hole for Bob- by Burns night, where I expected to hear the Toast to the Imsnor- tal Memory rendered in French, what with Bill C-72 and everything. Next year, they say in Ottawa.@ 9 ~ Wednesday, February 3, 1988 - North Shore News Versatile backdrop of UBC program NORTH VANCOUVER'S Ver- satile Pacific Shipyards Inc. will provide the backdrop for a Uni- versity of British Columbia educa- tional series on the art and science of modern shipbuilding. The two-part UBC-sponsored series will run from 7:30 p.m. to 10 p.m. Tuesday, Feb. 9 al the B.C. Research Council Building, 3650 Wesbrook Mall, UBC, and a subsequent tour of Versatile’s North Vancouver yard will take place from 9:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m. Saturday, Feb. 13. Included in the series will be Iec- tures, a film and a tank test demonstration in the B.C. Research Council Building. | ®ublic Forum FREE TRADE With the Honourable Lloyd Axworthy, P.C., M.P, Thursday February 4, 1888 8 p.m. Lonsdale Quay Hotel 123 Carrie Cates Court North Vancouver Free Admission Bponsored by the North Vancouver Faderal Liberal Association VIP \_ AIRPORT PARKING _ PARKING Series instructors include Roland Webb, Versatile’s superintendent of new construction, naval ar- chitect Gerald Stensgaard and maritime historian David Hill- Turner. For registration and other in- formation call the UBC Centre for Continuing Education at 222-5237. DRAPES BLINDS WINDOW BLINDS il Ha SHOP AND COMPARE! WE ALWAYS SELL OUR BUNDS AT UP TO A % OFF arey 5 ABBEY PLEATED SHADES THE MAME TO LOOK FOR IN BLINDS 926-8819 1441 CLYDE AVE. W.VANC. PARK & FLY $ 45° ner day 8311 Sea Island Way, Richmond BC. (next to Segal Furniture) Express Shuttle — 24 hrs., 7 days 500 CAI Bonus Points for 3 days parking 278-8311 STL FOREVER (%"""%,, Seasons AT WHISTLER A concrete building consisting of 13 condominiums located a short distance from the Whistler Gondola base. ‘ “ee February 6th (Saturday), 1988. From 12:00 pm - 4: 30 pm- - Not only | will you meet TED JOHNSON - and have: ‘all your vitamin questions answered, . i we will be holding an EX RA BONUS.” OPPORTUNITY: ®@ Purchase price includes one year cS membership i in [Interval International, permitting you to trade some or all of the © four weeks for anywhere in the world. @ Ownership allows you to use, rent or trade all or some of the weeks. ® Priced for IMMEDIATE sale. ® One month at Whistler: every year. | FEATURING: ; ® 1,200 sq. ft. deluxe condominiurns which sleep up to eight people @ 3 bedrooms; 2 bathrooms _ ° @ Private sauna ‘» @ Fully furnished, including dishes. . _ cutlery, bedding and TV " @ Outdoor tennis court and barbecue _ © Ample parking The Whistler Real Estate Co. Ltd. Vancouver: 684-0002 / 327-2569