46 - Wednesday, June 26, 1985 - North Shore News Dinner tabl woman who involves herself in’ various civic, political, and cultural functions, and would like to enjoy some of the social functions that come along with this. Di MISS MANNERS - I am a single travelling alone who wished to meet other passengers. DEAR MISS MANNERS - Neither my family nor the hospital informed me when my uncle died of cancer. I miss manners EL a by Judith Martin My problem is attending slightly whiny tone of it. But luncheons or dinners where the invitation states table reservations in groups of ten. On too many occasions I have been seated with people who are relatives or close friends of each other, whose conversations made m: levi as if I had intrud- : private family gar’ -< Why can’t ploar:: events be mc . -. single patrons .- - up these table: most of these benefits of sor... more singles . would ticipate if they felt their reel- ings mattered. GENTLE READER - Miss Manners will not go so far as to say that planners don’t think that the feelings of single people matter, cheifly because she doesn’: like the -she does think that you have an important suggestion that they ought immediately and gratefully adopt. The luncheons and dinners tha: vou describe are not aaieate varties, in which peo- > essa assly go to meet one he., but neither are they ike restaurant dining rooms, ia which people confine tiemaelves to the company they t-rought. Tiicy are more like ship- beard meals, where some people slay with their own ev and others mix. Those of you who remember the dear days when crossing the ocean was a civilized event will recall that passengers were always asked their seating preferences, and that the steward regularly made read about it in the newspapers. I put on a black suit, dark shoes and stockings, and my everyday black coat, and drove over to his house, where the family was assembled, preparing tc drive in procession to the memorial service at the church and then to the graveside ceremony. I had never been to a funeral before, nor have I had the occassion to attend very many formal ceremonies of any kind. It never occur- red to me whether J would do or say “‘the right thing.”” My uncle’s passing from this world was a great loss to me, although he and | had disagreed on how the world should be run and by whom. Before he became ill, we had some heated discussions which upset us beth, ahout the meaning and purpose of life. But I toved him. The rest of the family did not know it, but atl our dif- ferences were reconciled, and we forgave each other, two weeks before he died. What bothers me now is that my presence at the funeral was reiented by his wife and son. 1 think, too, that iny wearing black clothes was misunderstood. I was, as it turned out, the only one who dressed that way. I can- not repair my mistake, I'm afraid. I feel that even to make reference to the way 1 dressed at the Tuneral would be petty, as well as pointless. But perhaps your readers would do well to inquire if the widow intends to wear black. Or should everyone be advised that traditional mourning clothes are not ac- ceptable anymore? I didn’t mean to offend anyone. I just dida’t know. GENTLE READER - Miss Manners will be glad to discuss the proper clothing worn to funcrals, but that is not your problem. Your pro- blem - one that can and must be cleared up - has to do with the emotions of bereavement, not it’s trappings. Your uncle’s widow and son had cause to believe that you were on bad terms with up tables NOTICE OF INTENT RE: LIQUOR CONTROL AND LICENSING ACT - APPLICATION FOR “D” (NEIGHBOURHOOD PUBLIC HOUSE) LICENCE It is the intention of the undersigned to apply; pur- suant to the provisions of the Liquor Control and Licensing Act, to the General Manager, Liquor Con- trol and Licensing Branch, Victoria, B.C. for a Neighbourhood Public House licence to operate a licensed establishment on the premises situated at 135 Pemberton Ave., DISTRICT OF NORTH VAN- COUVER, B.C. PEMBERTON PUB LTD The above type of licence permits the sale of all types of alcoholic beverages by the glass on the premises between the hours of 9:00 a.m. and 11:00 p.m.; however if the focal Municipal or Regional authorities approve the closing hour could be ex- tended to 2:00 A.M. It also permits the sale of beer and B.C. Cider by the bottle for consumption off the premises. An independent survey of the residents located from a 350 metres to 800 metre radius of the site is to be conducted. Residents of this area should ensure that they cast their votes on this survey. Any additional expression of opinion on the proposal may be written to: Generai Manager Liquor Control and Licensing Branch P.O. Box 640 Victoria, British Columbia V8W 2P8 Written opinions must be received by July 22nd, 1985 to be considered. Care For Kids Become a Friend of Ay iv, ¢ British Columbia's a \_- < Children’s Hospital of passengers practical. Special German ceramic floor tile SALE! Perfect for indoors and outdoors. Unglazed or semi-glazed frost-free ceramic tile in 2 colours and sizes. Choose from ‘copper antique’ or ‘old leather’. 8” x8” reg, $3.95 sq.tt. $929 5”x10” reg. $3.89 sq.ft. 2 sq.ft. Many other in-store specials! Mosaic tiles from 49%sq. 1. Wall tile (e-x6 from 75%sa.tt. $449 $939 sq.ft. Floor tile (a-x8") from sq.ft. HURRY WHILE QUANTITIES LAST! Rosen Tile & Ceramics Ltd. SUSeeeo Hrs.: Mon-Sat 9:30-5:30 ac 149 W. 3rd St.. North Van PEE 980-4633 980-2218 a " TE econ apa your uncle when he died. In their grief, shunning you was an exaggerated, but understandable, form of loyalty. If you did not care for him alive, they must have reasoned, you should not pretend to do so at his death. Only you know that this was not the case, You have eloquently ceavinced Miss Manners that you loved your uncle in spite of philisophical differences, and that you were even able to let him know this before he died. Tell the rest of his family. ft will make an enormous difference. While it is true that people seldom dress properly for funerals anymore - proper dress being black for the family and subdued, dark clothing for friends - it is cer- tainly not inappropviate to do so. Had your relatives believ- ed that you were genuinely grief-stricken, they would not have objected. Feeling incorrect? Address Jour etiquette questions (in black or blue-black ink on white writing paper) to Miss Manners,in care of this e etiquette a must newspaper. The quill shor- tage prevents Miss Manners from answering questions Other than through this coltunn, BUY WITH CONFIDENC IT ADVERTISED IF YOU FIND TAIL REFUND The DIFFERENCE OLONY HOME FURNISHINGS Warehouse/Showroom OPEN TO THE PUBLIC (2 biks. behind the Avalon} at 1075 Roosevelt Cres., N.Van. 12-4 Sun GOO-B 1.36 The elegant alternative to the traditional drapes Offering ... 1” Mini Venetian ¥2” Micro Venetian Vertical Pleated Shades Woven Woods