-. Stewart. may be reached. at. 261-6242 for. appointments for — __ dndividual, ‘counselling. . --:: residents. really like that, but I tend to ‘make my own: rules and live. by them whether other people in general are follow- ing them. or not. Other - -people’s opinions have never . bothered me very much. I live my life and let them live theirs. I’ve never been in trouble except the trouble a _ fellow. has when he chooses to be a bit different. ; Now here’s my problem. Recently I have changed my mind about one of .my “different’? ways of behav- ing and I want to back off and _ goin anew way. The trouble. is, what I_want to do is really straight and waspy. I think it fs the best: way for me, but I . : hate being labelled square. I feel ‘almost ashamed. of ‘- been a sort of free spirit. I. don’t like that phrase much ~ . because it tends to be. ” thought of as describing a "posturing: kind of show-off: _ .who: attracts attention: by being ‘‘different’’.:.’'m_ not. ranks. 1 guess I'm “mixed up. Have you ever had . handle it? aa r She eee ce eee teeter el . >... that’s your job. Keep in_your. _-.splace. Pick up.the papers.’’?. ooo a0 Does that answer “‘fit’’ you. Bo opretty: well? Does. it. “fit? ,QUESTION:: My husband is . better if you tell him to clean =| | up his own mess or get lost, | - and that you:.want him: to’. ~ know. that you are not: his . lackey and don’t intend to'act : like it?: Is that more like you? * | - Somewhere-in between those very thoughtless and selfish '.,- around: the ‘house. -He’s a “. good. provider and» works , hard and Is never any trouble |. tome, ‘except he keeps. “adding to my work, and when. | Somewhere ir Ae | 4. Fk vask his’ help he. says,- two extremes, you might find . oc “That’s YOUR job”’.. It’ )is your answer. Could you tell | ' to. 8 ‘him you want to do your best . . : _- with the kids and the house, : have four small children, all ~ _ pre-school and I’m with them. * --alll day and have a big house _ ’. to look, after. 1 do well with ~: the kiddies, but it sure keeps very irritating “to. say the - teast. I’ -work -hard: too. We- me hopping.. I’m a pretty. job!” What do you do with a. ee ot man like that? 0 ee ‘His. new ‘office im. the Plaza. 9 00 } . International. Hotel... fopen. -- Tuesdays only] is. for the - - convenience of. North Shore .. tee, wl Your: rebelliousness. may geod housekeeper tco. But when he comes ‘home and .- leaves beer cans around and - tirrows the paper all over the” <>. floor when he ‘reads: it: and __ . fen just gets up and walks © "away: and: leaves the floor: Len SE oo strewn: with: papers, I see. _.-Freelance Counsellor, Hayden --about him. Perhaps. both’ of _ .ing how. you can. contribute "more to the telationship. You ae oe » > Will make ‘no contribution to es os the marriage, nor to him nor: “STEWART: It. depends: on’ -what ‘sort of person you are — _ and what sort of person-he is. OE antes neat Madre La nA APO LeR NREL wack Niet na “you’re at in regard to your “red. Dll say, will you pick up. . your paper and beer cans and che. says, ‘That's. YOUR family’. or. group... you, “‘Do:a > tells y: but that you ‘are going to - ‘refuse:to do senseless chores — _ that he creates for you out of... his-own lack of respect for | you as a human being? —-. should do. It. all depends on. who. you. are ‘and: where feelings about yourself and you need to have . some counselling help in discover- to yourself by grovelling and - Selling yourself short. Please ~ don’t fall into that mess. ~.to.. you ..when you - were wo 9+ heading away from conform-' a ane + ity. They: need “not be now | _ STEWART: You ‘can: handle. . it:.-by ‘respecting your. free — “spirit. as. it ‘finds ‘its “way ‘through ‘this conundrum. -say!’". There now, with that — . that lam also burned by your | Wo. reatlydiculous”: argument. ~ Jam sure you can see. why -T cannot “say, (even if I~ wanted to) this. is what you: _What’s your dad got to do. not the case. Others’ opin- | mixed | ave you ever had ions were not very important — ‘a‘case”’ like me? How can I ° y ~~ himself up to 420 pounds, s _ why -shouldn’t ‘1?’?) Or -how ~ does this ‘sound to you? ‘*My PH bet: you -wouldn’t even ‘Don’t do as I do.- do.as I. like this one:. All the kids out of the way, I want to add. - One of our facts. that..there ARE standards. So- pa ‘to the. -- either, provided you ‘respect... : “your. own. choice’ without. ‘f reference ‘to the cost. Let “yourself see. you ‘are being. © i have’ ‘been . too:.easy all | of your different-ness. If takes a real rebel to. Pee ‘move toward ‘a specific: |... “Keep right with it boy! _ ‘more free. (in this instance). — nave’ ‘been 1 rasy | by” conforming. .than you | together for you. Perhaps you just drifted along being - *‘different - like everyone © . .else’’.. Now you may be faced = with the most truly rebellious: Move you’ve made - that of © rebelling against one aspect _. would. be. in chickening out. . \ od _@ ; wm TS yet orthodoxy and still remain'a .