C7 - Wednesday, Oct. 7, 1981 - North Shore News QUESTION: I have a responsibility -to honor which I don't want to do. It is not a part of my work, but it ° “ = a 4 ' r 3 aed . uA a, a 4 . nee. We oe . = . ; ; _ . agreed to do it partly because I was flattered at being asked, I have lost the enthusiasm and feeling of STEWART: My tendency ~vould be to back off if my heart was not in it. If I discovered, soon enough, counted on, would certainly not do a thing to enharice, your reputation. Right? . Depending on how you feel about your reputation being enhanced, or dimmed, you might have discovered a good motive for sticking with it. You might think that through a bit. Another consideration you might mull over has to do with how _ask hayden stewart . Freelance Counsellor Hayden Stewart may be reached at 261-6242 for appointments for individual. family or group counselling. His office in the International Plaza Hotel (Open Tuesdays only) is for the is related to the field of work I'm in. It-was something of an honor to be approached and it would enhance my reputation as a well-qualified person, if I did it adequately. It will, be an exacting and difficult chore that will take a lot of my energy, con- centration and time. > Because of that, and because I am now aware I convenience of North Shore residents. commitment that I would need to do it well. In other words, I don't want to do it. But I agreed to do it and am being depended on to see it through. See my uandry? © Do I respect my promise and struggle through it without the devotion to it I need, or do | express my regrets and back off? that I had taken on the job because being asked to do it flattered me, I would back off and probably tell them why. But in your case, are you too late? You see, if ‘doing this extra piece of work well would enhance your reputation, (as you say) then it is logical that NOT doing it, or backing off from it when you are being you feel if you do it, and how you will feel if you don’t do it. You said you would do it. You'd better feel real good about any reason you might have for cancelling out on your agreement. If you feel rotten about backing off, you would probably be better off to roll up your sleeves and get at it. Do it well if doing it is your decision. If opting out is your decision, do that well, too. Parents won’t let me run my own life QUESTION: My parents are always trying to run my life. They think they have to make every decision for me. I like them O.K. but man I sure wish they'd show a little confidence in me and let me run my own life, after all I ‘am 15. How can I get them to lay off and let me make my own decisions? If they'd do that, almost everything in our family would be neat. STEWART: Some parents seem to want to hang on to South Granville Centre 2658 Granville St. | (at 10th Ave.) the control of their children’s lives long after they don't actually need to * do it anymore. Some, parents are just plain slow about making that transition. If they are, in fact, too slow, that is their problem. But sometimes they are utterly convinced, (because of the sort of decisions their kids are making), that they are still needed in keeping a tight rein on them. Have you been convincing your parents by your dumb ef a ’ * ¢: “, : "4 ee, 2) bate i vs Ly ¢ ~ fall collectibles fun to wear taly decisions that you need them to control you still? I think the very best way for you to change the Situation is to govern your own life in such a way that they will say to each other, “Hey, we've got a pretty wise kid here. He's no fool. He isn't a slave to everything the other kids are doing and he’s got a good mind of his own. He's really growing up. He’s quite a guy.” Do your end of it well. If they still hang on too much, opping the news for the textured sweater Bulky. soft and Hand made in In luscious fall shades (SMI) $125 Park Royal South West Vancouver, B.C. CANON ouicen try harder to convince them that you're “quite a guy.” Even then they may seem a little slow to you. But hang in there, you've got time. * all floor models @ Moistens and loosens most dried-on food a When the wash cycle * comes on, the food's ready to go! All models exc ept * 787 a The first dishwasher with a steam cydie. ® Because steam goes ’ places water can't idaste Hing a career for you Hairdressing MOLER SCHOOL of HAIRDRESSING Register NOW! FREE Information 985-59 11 173A Lansdale Ave. idaste Hing i * everything must go! * @ Push a button to delay start of wash time up to 9 hours. @ Wash while you're out of earshot a Wash when energy demands are low Available on models #55989 and #1D191 POLYMAR KITCHENS & BATHROOMS 156 W. 3rd St.. N.V. 986-3111 or 987-5012 “NORTH SHORE’S FINEST KITCHEN REMODELLING SPECIALISTS” 2 ote ee rere eR een i | ALWAYS QUALITY AT A REASONABLE PRICE |