ei Ta nL Ee a SRS. AE EOL LLL OED DDB EES _<_edunselling. freelance Counsellor Hayden _ “Stewart ‘may. be reached at * "261-6242 for appointments for individual, family or group ‘sively - oHis. new- office in the Plaza International . Tuesdays on'y] -is \or -the Hote? {open convenienceé.. -of North Shore Sf residents. Success : story QUESTION: | What is your assessment. of A.A.? : (Alcoholics Aionymous) STEWART: I regard it very ‘highly. It has been ex- traordinarily successful in helping people learn how to live intentionally, even though they are alcoholics. Like anything else, however, A.A. is not worth much to the alcoholic who just sort of hangs around the edges instead of programme”. A.A. has a specific programme geared to the real needs of those who dearly want help. The famous TWELVE STEPS, in order to be valuable, must be LIVED rather than just memorized or -hung on the wall. A person who really wants to handle his alcoholism adequately, will get im- measureable help by living - THE TWELVE STEPS. As long as twenty years ago, the Yale School of Alcohol Studies evaluated A.A: as being ten country” miles ahead of every other known way of helping alcoholics. God drives me around the bend QUESTION: The word “God” drives me around the bend. I tdghten up defen- and loosen up aggressively whenever someone uses the word in my hearing. It has come to have such a wide variety of meanings that it doesn’t mean anything at all. I am a believer in God, but can’t I give him another name? STEWART: Don't ask me. Ask him. T have a feeling he (or she, or even it) won't fall apart if he’s addressed by the name you feel at home with. The other) day someone “getting on the ° | QUESTION: who has had a lot of turmoil over spells -of depression. It has -been. my pattern -for years. and believe me I've ~. been to a let of doctors ‘and — have gobbled a lot of their prescription pills = anti= '.’ depressants, tranquilizers, i_ete, But I'm here to tell. you © that the best thing I've run “| geross is smoking . dope ‘ ean be so low it eceleebte ‘and in no time, after a ' joint, I could beat ‘the world. ‘Anything seems possiele to me. I am able to set goals and be full of enthusiasm over the prospects of reaching. them. It credibly beautiful. Why in the world isn’t dope made legal so doctors prescribe it? ’ STEWART: I am told that this is already a practice in “Some areas. Perhaps the medical profession, or the government, or whoever, is moving slowly out of failure to recognize the values that - you see in smoking dope. I don’t know. | It may feel better to you than pills do,, but your comments sound to me pretty much like the things pill-users claim. You say, .after a joint, | COULD BEAT. THE WORLD”. A great feeling, I'll bet, ‘but tell me, have you. “beat the QUESTION: I work with three other girls in an office and our boss Is gay. At least everybody says he Is. He's a perfect gentleman and as far as bosses go,-he’s easy to work for. One of the girls says she feels perfectly comfortable and, as she puts it, “His sexual preferances are his business and none of my business.” Well, I guess I'd like to feel that way too, but I just can’t. | kind of squirm around him, I just don’t feel comfortable at all. The other two girls ‘feel something like I do, but one of them Is determined to do something about it. She says she’s ashamed of herself for feeling like she does and that she wants to find how she . can overcome her “f{udgemental attitude”. The other girl hates working for him, but thinks she’s right to feel that way. She needs the job, and as she says, she’s not going to make = any waves, but she thinks the company should not hire someone like him. What do you think we should do? STEWART: Two of you have got it all settled, One is saying, “TN use him ‘all don't need the job”. One of them is saying. “It's his life and he is no bother to me I'm a fellow is in-* _ back = a. Bit, can ~ . + world” , or do you. just feel ‘like you could? You say, “Anything seems. possible”. ‘Great! But, tell usin your next ietter, what HAS been ° “Possible for you. ——~-You say. you-can.—“set -. goals” and “be full of en- thusiasm over the prospects _Of reaching. them”. Great! But in your next letter, you . could make.a better case for marijuana by telling us WHAT goals you.have set, and what goals you have reached, I am open to being convinced and ~ ready. to cheer for real progress, but. ‘at this point I am hanging seeing your comment as nothing much more than.“high” hopes. ‘Is that what you want? T have high hopes that you can find something even more — rewarding than dope. Smoking dope for the fun of _it, bothers me a lot less than using it as a “cure” for what ails you. YOU will cure what ails you much more ef- __fectively than dope will. I expect you were taught quite early in life that you “had a lot of inadequacies that could be offset by, medicine or booze or some other cure-all. Did you learn that at your mother’s knee — or some other joint? (I went ~a long way -to-get that pun out of my system didn’t I?) he boss . sgay but... and I like working for him”. You and the fourth girl are not pleased with your at- titudes and you'd like to change them in some way. Right? s Why not get with the girl whose attitude you like and talk and talk and talk. Let lher know you admire her way of handling the relationship and see if you can’t all help each other in coming out where you'd like to be. I feel good about you doing some THINKING and paying attention to how you feel, rather than talking a rigid stand (one way or the other) saying. “you are wrong, and I'll have nothing to do with you", or saying, “you're right and it's O.K. with me", Whether you feel his way is “right” or “wrong” is utterly unimportant. How you are able to work out a relationship with him that makes you feel honest and friendly is VERY important, both to you and to him Depending on your conditioning and teaching, you may find some dif- ficulties along the way, but I hope you keep with it and come out happy = with yourself, ‘phoned my number and asked for Sterling Hayden! I knew who he meant and we're going to get together. Gatting together was the purpose of his call, and it worked, I God) backs off from you because you ad- dress him improperly, he's loo touchy to have as a friend anyway Relax, and pet together QUESTION: The title you have announced for your series of talks at the Plaza a relief! “Some Principles of Living” ‘is so ‘much better than “THE ‘Principles of Living”. I'm fed up with the eerie see if you are as laid back-as ~your title! Is there a chance you have used that easy- feeling +title of “Some Principles of Living” but will outline just exaetly the one true way once you get us all lecture and book fiiles that “inthe hall hall? suggest that the speaker has © the ONE AND ONLY TRUE ANSWER to all the world’s “woes, My:next hottest peeve is about: HOW TO lectures and books. I'll be out of town for your first lecture, but Pll _ be there in February just to “Classified STEWART: By the time you’ read, this, the § first, EVENING WITH HAYDEN’ STEWART will have passed by. So ask someone who was there! 25th. “Mon.-Fri. 9 a.m. - 9 p.m. Saturday 9.a.m. - 5 p.m. FIREBIRD Like New _ V8, P.S. P.B. Auto Trans - $5995 >-2. * See you February 10 REASONS. WHY! YOUR $ GOES FURTHER at NORTHRIDGE QUESTION: Helv do 1 go about consulting with -vou? STEWART: © Jusi phone - 261-6242 0 for an’ ‘appointment. 73 JENSEN HEALY A Real Beauty Soft & Hard Top Fully Reconditioned Stereo, ‘4695 OVER 60 USED VEHICLES FULLY RECONDITIONED AND PRICED FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION *3995 *4495 PPro | HAYSUEK | douge Trucks | Seid Me 78 CORDOBA Fully Loaded Sunroof Air, Warranty Leather Seats, Stereo Cruise, Power Windows, Etc. ‘7695 77 DODGE PICKUP V8 Mags. Auto Tran. Low Miles 74 FURY 4 Door Sedan Runs Like New $1995 78 COLT Auto Trans, onty 3000 Miles Warranty for 6 Months ¢OY 76 DODGE CORONET A Beautiful Car 4Door, V8,P.S. P.B. Above Average $2795 78 DIPLOMAT This Car Comes With Every Available Option. WAS $1170.00 ‘7995 Rey 73 V.W. Super Beetle Nice Shape 73 THUNDERBIRD Loaded, Ajr Tilt: Etc. Nice Shape *3995 -« See the difference -Buy at NORTRIRIDGE PLYMOUTH CHRYSLER USED CAR DEPARTMENT 1695 MARINE DR N.VAN 980-6511 HURRY H ¥ 22295 reeexse: x x [ee Mite, \ - .