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‘a3’ Chesterfield:

LAST WEEK Zap asked
if you agreed with sugges-
tions to have police
patrolling Lynn Canyon
Park to stop people from
drinking and risky
behavior that often leads
to accidents or death.

WEVE GONE OVER THIS
MATERIAL A HUNDRED

me TWMES , DILL-ON-- Wy

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I think that the risk-takers will
find it even more fun trying to
dodge police patrols. The idea of
trying to stop people to let
alcohol in the park is a good
idea to stop the senseless deaths.
In general I think it's a good
idea but I think they should have
Jlots of policemen.

BEATS ME, MAAM...

L'srose tu juss VY

Stuck WITH A HUMONeuST
“ LEARNING CURVE”

(N (81S A PRIVATE IN THE
BRITIGH ARMY WAS SERVING
IN INDIA AND REFUSED TO
ORINK THE PAILY DOSE OF
RUM THAT WAS SUPPLIEE 70
THE SOLDIERS. HE HAD SEEN
A TEETOTALLER ALL HIS LIFE
BUT THAT DID NOT PREVENT
HIM FROM BEING COURT-
MARTIALLED AND EXECUTED
8Y FIRING SQUAD!

1 don’t think I'd enforce it.
Enforce the protection of people
in Lynn Canyon by putting up
gates so people wouldn’t be able
to climb up them.

They should check for alcohol
because that’s why most of the
people got hurt. But I don’t

think there’s any point putting
up higher fences because if
someone is crazy enough to take
a cisk like thai they'll find a way
to get over a fence no matter
what the height. And if someone
does get hurt and the rescue
squad does have to come they
should have to pay ail the costs.

Getting tough
with Quebec

BEFORE I start, I’d better make a couple of things clear:
One, I am a Federalist. That is, I want Canada to stay
together as a nation. Quebec and all. Two, I am a Cana-

dian Nationalist.

In case any province, say
Quebec, for example, decided to
leave, I would fight my hardest to
keep as much of it for Canada (as
you'll probably see if you con-
tinue reading). If this is starting to
seem like the gripes of a West Van
resident and ‘‘private school kid,”
heck, I can’t change that.

As Canadians, we are faced.

with the stark reality of a sad,
very possible destruction of our
‘excessive’? country. The separa-
tion would spell the end of a true
Canada, and would be a sad mo-
ment for all of us. As much as I
want Quebec to be a part of
Canada, it seems to be that our
only ‘‘French-Canadian”’ province
wants to be its own country.

If it gets to the point where we
can’t do anything more about it,
we had better remember a couple
of things.

If Quebec leaves our union, it
must leave with exactly the same
amount of land with which .it
entered into Confederation. This
means Quebec would be one-third
the size it is now, it would be un
petit strip of land along the shores
of the St. Lawrence. As far as I’m
concerned, if they’re going to
leave the country, they should get
the land they had before the

- country existed.

Why do I say this? Because it
was after Confederation that
Quebec gained much of its current
territory, with the purchase of the
Hudson’s Bay Company lands,
along with the addition of Ungava
and other territories.

Secondly, it must concede all
the ‘‘Canadian’’ assets, transpor-
tation routes, Crown projects such
as various industries, ports and
airports among other things. This
way, we still get to keep the im-
portant stuff after Quebec says au
revoir. In all seriousness, though,
it provides Canada with another
steady source of income which can

By Taleeb Noormohamed
Zap writer

help our pathetic economic situa-
tion, all thanks to Mr. Mulroney
(but that’s another story).

Time for a_ strange-but-true
fact: In the last 10 years, Quebec
has received more money from
Ottawa than any other province.
It seems that Quebec gets all the
little perks of being in Canada,
and if it wants to leave it had bet-
ter give all the little perks back.

They also ran up a huge part of
our national debt. (You’ve got to
pay for those perks somehow.)
This means that with their popu-
lation base (approximately 24-
26% of Canada), the new Quebec
must shoulder its portion of
Canada’s national debt, 25% of
it. Ouch.

Third, there might still be some
unhappy guys in the new Quebec
who might want to have access to
Canadian defence systems. No
dice.

In better English, that would be
something like this. Quebec would
and must not have the right to
gain any men or arms now utilized
by the Canadian Armed Forces.
All equipment, men and bases in
Quebec would remain Canadian-
controlled, and would remain Ca-
nadian until all the money owed
to Canada by Quebec (as stated

- above) was repaid.

But everybody’s got to keep the
situation in perspective. If every
Canadian thought seriously about
our state of affairs for a while, we -
would all probably realize that
Canada doesn’t need amputations.
All it needs is some therapy and
some tender loving care ... eh?

— Taleeb Noormohamed is a
Grade 10 student of St. George’s
school. He lives in West Van-
couver.

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