Mordida spins eovernment wheels TEACAPAN., Sinaloa, Mexico — If you cross the Mexican border early of a morning, the uniformed man who types out your Tourist Visa may have a stack of American dollar bills beside his old Under- wood typewriter. He is not passing out free sam- ples. That pile is a signal. Take out your wallet. Put outa dollar and fold it into the palm of your hand. Do not make a big thing of it for ostentation is vulgar. He will see your hands move. When handed your visa, quietly put your contribution on the pile while saying *‘Many thanks, sir."’ In the days when Mexico’s customs men still inspected in- bound cars, you would also have a dollar or two folded around the middle finger of one hand when an inspector approached. He would glance at yous hand and at your car trunk, nod and bid you welcome to his country without further tiresome for- malities. Crossing an international border had become a pleasant social ex- perience. This is the classic form of what they call Mordida, a word that means ‘‘The Little Bite’* — nota tip, not a bribe, but a bit of both. The custom is as old as Mexico. Canadians and Americans are taught to detest such practices. They expect that a government official accept not even so much as one cardboard match to light his cigarette, lest he be com- promised. The official may have poorer manners than your Labrador Re- triever. He may be less anxious to serve you than your cat. But he is, God be witness, pure as a vestal virgin of all taint of bribery, and Churches hold ‘celebration’ CHRISTIAN CHURCHES throughout the North Shore will embark next week on their Cele- bration of Hope, which is the se- cond phase of the Growthquake seminars held in October. The key speaker at the events will be Michael Green of UBC’s Regent College, who has written about, taught and practised evangelism around the world. Green and approximately $0 of his students from different coun- tries will share their message in informal house meetings or larger organized events. Says Green of his students: “They are all studying at Van- couver'’s post-graduate theological institution, Regent College. They are bored by religion, but they have a passionate attachment to Jesus Christ. People who want to become in- volved in the Celebration, perhaps by organizing a small meeting of friends in their home, are invited to call 985-7132. A gathering of the church peo- ple involved will be held Monday, Jan. 14 at 7:30 p.m. in Delbrook Baptist Church. The whole community is invited to a Friday, Jan. 38, 7:30 p.m. gathering at North Shore Alliance Church, 201 East 23rd St.. North Vancouver, A targe community rally will be held on Sunday, Jan. 20, 7 p.m., at North Vancouver’s Centennial Theatre, 2300 Lonsdale Ave... where Green will speak on the “*stress of success.” Paul St. Pierre PAULITICS & PERSPECTIVES to make sure he remains that way we cheerfully pay him some of the world’s highest salaries for his work. As will be explained in the next column on this subject, a form of Mordida was instituted some years ago by the Canadian Coast Guard but it was alien to Canadian ways and has been abandoned. To us, Mordica is at best a secret vice, like masturbation. Cabinet ministers go to jail when caught at it. Taking Mordida, that is. (One of the longest court cases in British Columbia history ended with a jury ruling that a cabinet minister had taken a bribe but that nobedy had paid one. It could only have happened in B.C.) Down here in this warm and unpuritanic land, Mordida is oil that rakes the squeal out of bu- reaucratic machinery. It can rear- range regulations, cut red tape and save tedious paperwork. At its best, Mordida does not cause a pubic official to break the law. It encourages him to act both lawfully and speedily. You don’t tip a waiter to steal food from the Starts January 12th 30% restaurant kitchen, do you? You tp him io do what he is already paid once. poorly, for doing — serving vou. Mordida was designed for use by honorable men rather than greedy ones, An honorable example involved a gringo who drove at uncons- cionable speeds down Reforma Boulevard in Mexico City. When pulled over by a motorcycle cop he knew that Mordida would have to be very high and handed over a large wad of pesos. The policeman said it was more than the going rate and handed half the pesos back to him. Alas, the Mordida system is not easily learned. Only Mexicans know it well and some of them abhor it. Once, crossing at Nogales, a Miesxican agricultural official asked to see our hunting dog’s permit. We had it, with a five dollar bill folded inside. He opened the paper, looked, closed the paper, handed it back and said ‘All | ASKED for was your PERMIT."* We removed the money and passed over the paper a second time. Not one of Canada’s more glorious moments. Mordida has its faults. It en- courages a frame of mind where quite outrageous acts of bribery may occur. Recently, a federal government official admitted that big time criminals in Mexico City jails were paying Mordida to build luxurious apartments within the prisons, They invited ladies in for dinners. Some of them were slipping out on weekends for trips to Las Vegas. This is a bit beyond pass- ing over a couple of dollars to escape an overtime parking ticket. But at lower levels, Mordida has a place. No gringo should condemn it out of hand. Not, at least, until he reads the next col- umn on this subject. ee -50% OFF... Terry and velour robes, cozy nighties, pyjamas and hostess wear. 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