34 - Sunday, duly 31, 1988 - North Shore News DEAR MISS MANNERS — At a recent event, a na- tionally known television personality was present, and many of us were introduced to her. When my turn came, the hostess mentioned my name and said a few words about the nature of my work. The television star was just about to open her mouth to talk to me, when the woman next to me butted in, totally overwhelming the star by introducing herself and tell- ing all about herself and her af- fairs. I just stood there, feeling 1 had been dropped like a hot potato, and after a minute or two, quietly left. Shouldn’t the television person- ality have fielded this woman’s ag- gressiveness and acknowledged my introduction to her, instead of let- ting me stand there, ignored? I would think that a star who is so much in the Umelight would ‘possess sufficient poise to deal with this type of situation. GENTLE READER — Limelight tends to get in the eyes, so that a celebrity being jostled about by competing admirers may well have trouble seeing such a situation well enough to take charge of it. You forget that she was a guest herself, among strangers, who might understandably have hesitated to seem to rebuke another guest. If anyone could have stopped the rude butter-in without creating a scene, it was the hostess. In the time-honored way of guiding guests, she could have held up a gentle hand to the intruder, with a hostessy ‘‘Just a second, Mary ~ let’s let her meet one person at a time.’” DEAR MISS MANNERS — One of my co-workers frequently eats lunch at the same time I do. She is very young and usually brings things such as sandwiches. I enjoy cooking and often bring things that are more interesting than the usual brown-bag fare the others are eating in our company’s lunch room. This young woman frequently wants to know what the ingre- dients are in my lunch, how it was made, what it tastes like, etc., and says, ‘Boy, does that look gcod!”’ These discussions often take up the better part of our lunch period. I tolerated this for a long time but have grown tired of having my lunch dissected. [| am sure this girl Pacific Language Institute #303, 1155 Robson St. Vancouver ENGLISH CLASSES FOR INTERNATIONAL STUDENTS & VISITORS e Daytime - intensive & immersion I * Evening - TOEFL, writing, pronunciation, conversation © All levels - monthly registration ¢ Friendly atmosphere-English only | Contact Robyn Inman 688-8330 miss Manners Judith Martin has no idea iow rude she is being. Offering recipes has not resolved the situation. I would like to be able to tell her that these intense probings of another person’s meal are inap- propriate, but I] don’t want to burt her feelings. What would be gentle but to the point? lack of poise I might add that [am one of her supervisors, She is an unmarried mother, and seems to be quite naive and inexperienced. GENTLE READER — Miss Manners commends you for hav- ing offered the young lady instruc- tions on how to prepare her own interesting lunch, and agrees that that cancels any responsibility you may feel on that topic in the cause of politeness. You certainly need not share your own lunch, which is what she seems to be hinting that you should do. The next time she inquires, Miss Manners suggests that you wave the topic away with ‘‘Oh, never mind the food — if you’re free, let’s get some work done.’’ She feels confident that the merest at- tempt to give out recipes for im- proving her work will soon drive away the young lady and her ap- petite. DEAR MISS MANNERS — I am 30 years old and happily married. My parents were divorced a year ago, and my father married again. IT have not met his bride, as we five 6,000 miles away, in a different country. 20t' 1-323: ate Bay: also: My husband and I have been saving to offer my parents a trip here to see us. When it comes to my father, how can we do this? We can't afford to offer the trip to three people (Mom, Dad and his wife), yet we feel it might be in- sulting to just offer my father the trip and not his wife. GENTLE READER — Although it is extremely generous of you to offer to finance your parents’ trips, you are doubtless aware that invitations and tickets do not always come in matched sets. In this case, Miss Manners would consider it gracious enough to write ‘‘We do hope Eileen will be able to join you, as we are anx- ious to meet her,’’ while sending your father the original amount planned. Perhaps he can take ad- vantage of special airline offers to help with his wife’s ticket, but you are allowed discreetly to ignore that aspect of the problem. On the North Shore since 1955 Cte PARTS & SERVICE 34% PARTS & SERVICE FOR MAJOR APPLIANCES Parts Dept. open 9:00 to 5:30 Mon. to Fri., Sat. 9 to 5 Major appliance in-home service is as near as your phone. 1629 Garden Ave., North Vancouver 987-2251 } Vacuum cleaner parts or bring your cleaner in for servicing.