8 ~ Sunday, June 22, 1986 - North Shore News

Doug Collins
® get this straight ®

Motorists may face stiffer
drinking driving penalties

CONVICTED impaired drivers
face a driving suspension of at
least 12 months — under a bill
recently introduced by Transporta-
tion and Highways Minister Alex
Fraser.

driving are probably the best
deterrent to drinking and driving,’’
Fraser said. ‘Not. only will they
make drinkers think again about
driving but also protect the public
from convicted drinking drivers

THIS COLUMN is being written with the best of inten-
| tions. So don’t think I’m being my usual disgusting racist
| self. Even Doug has a heart. No, all I want is better things

for all. You can nominate me for the Nobel Prize for Do-
{ ing Good, if you like. A Bishop Tutu lurks inside me, just

q longiag to jump. out.
“Three of-us, i.e. Gray Eyes, a

4 visitor from England and I, were

giving Expo the once-over. The
visitor isn’t too good on her pins,
the old dear, and my back’s giving
me hell, so we were making for
the ‘Canadian Pacific skyride to
-Tswing us-over to the North West
Territories Pavilion and the Icicles
Restaurant. You’know. Musk-ox
burgers, reindeer steaks, etc.
No sooner had we mounted the
§ loading ramp than the ride broke
down. It had seen me coming,
_ | said my dear wife. So we tottered
~ Loff on foot, with me joking about

the people bobbing around up -

“dying for a pee.’
‘-There was a huge line-up at the

NWT building, causing me to.

[think that musk-ox burgers would’
have to remain on-our list of great
expectations. .

* “Do--you knov where I cicles
is?’’.I asked. “Noy. haven’t: ‘seen:

any. sitice January!” Expo ciowds

are depressingly cheerful, you
. then, be admitted. There is a way

‘know But there it was, in ‘the end. :
And‘no fine-up. |

-- Not much of one; anyway. The

tables were all occupied’ and. it

looked. as ifthe, diners would.
munch and guzzle for ever, caring :~

nothing for the: ‘few of us. who

“teeth, **They’ ve probably: all con-.

“} tributed’ -to © Ethiopian ° “relief,
} though,’ baa & ‘thought: bitterly.

- usual soft - whisper. Her

‘answer was a-jab on the. old

I gluteus medius, which is part of
‘T my back Problem. ,

Five minutes drag by, which i is a

TAL NAKED:
home Monday after:he was spotted
‘by teachers’ of Queen Mary Com-
“munity School exposing himself to

‘ children, from his front window.
The 38-year-old North Van-
couver man.was. arrested in his

West Keith Road apartment,
shortly before ¢ a.m. by RCMP.

Police repo, the man had ap-
parently repeatedly been appearing
naked in his ‘front window, as
groups of. elementary age children
walked by on their way to school.

’ He was reported to police after

“being spotted by several members

.of the teaching staff at Queen
«Mary School.

: He was taken to the North Van-

couver RCMP detachment and |
-later released pending a court ap-

pearance. The man was charged
with committing an indecent act.

Classifieds
Sell
936-6222

long time when nothing is happen-

_ ing. I ask the Eskimo lady at the

cash-desk whether the plaza is to
be opened, one of these days. She
smiles nicely but says nothing,
knowing no English, I. suppose.
And I know no Inuit.

It dawns on me that what we
are seeing is affirmative action in
action.

I spy another Eskimo female
waiting at table. Ignoring Gray
Eyes’ warning look, I put the

same question to her. She says she’

doesn’t know. Meanwhile, the ex-
terior Eskimos: are still laying
tables. Slowly.

[assume my most ingratiating
John Cleese grin and accost 2
white waitress. She says she
doesn’t know what’s going on but
that she will fetch someone who

a does.
: Someone arrives, and says yes,”

we can go back through the lobby
and wait at the flowerpot near the
entrance to the plaza. We will

the. plaza through the
restaurant: itself, but taking that
route. would “be too simple,
obvicusly. ;
We arrive at the flowerpot. A
ropé ba rier is removed. We.are

We at EDGEMON?: ‘botave we can match or beat any carpet ¢ or lino prices —

in! The service is not too bad. Not |

too good, either. But by this time
it is clear that the thing to do is to
smile at everyone as foolishly as
possible and hope for the best.

The musk-ox is OK, but not as
good as beef. Well, nobody had
said it would be.

Our waitress asks Gray Eyes
whether she would like a warm-up
for her coffee. Gray Eyes nods
happily. But on taking a swallow,
she announces that what she got
was a cold-up. I would have fallen
off my seat laughing, but the
damaged gluteus medius wouldn’t
Jet me,

Sated on the meats, veggies and
warm-ups, of the North, we drift
out. There are now about a dozen
people waiting hopefully at the
rope barrier, which for some
reason known only to heaven was
put back into place after we
entered, thus denying customers

access again. No one is taking the |

slightest notice of the poor souls
even though most of the. plaza

tables are- empty.” As we pass, {

some of those would-be con-
sumers‘amble. off glumly, Icoking
for a Chinese smorgasbord or-a
Big Mac.

“T reflect that some people can
do some things, some others. I,
for instance, could not chew blub-
ber or catch a beluga whale. And
some cannot do restaurant work.

’ Teli you one thing, though. |

Icicles has a damned fine stuffed
Polar Bear in the lobby. Could he
be running the joint?

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Saxony’ S-

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Clearance of all Armstrong Cancide and-Oesigner Solarian in stock; trom $15.99 to.

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