CRINKLE POINT-COUNTERPOINT “ seauty une UNLESS YOU have a pineapple growing out of your head, and the spiny leaves are wreaking havoc with your wool hats, there's no point in wasting time, money and energy on cosmetic surgery, Let me be clear: there are those for whom cosmetic surgery is necessary to alleviate crippling self-esteem problems (which doesn't say anything very nice about our society), but many peo- ple who opt for remoulding simply have more money than character. In my mind, the polar opposite of a person with character is someone who wants to look like somebody — anybody — other than himself, : By Tina Gilbertson Contrituting Writer Character, to me, is much more attractive than a smooth lide nose picked (if you'll pardon the pun) from page 46 of The New Nose Catalogue in the plastic surgeon's office. Let’s compare, Character wins you friends, So might a new nose, you say. But with character, you can give cach of your friends a brick for Christmas and tell them you'll get them a new one every year until they can build themselves their dream home. Try that with a new nose and see Hf you don't end up back in the plastic surgeon's office for a brick extraction. Since new noses could be argued to be more the realm of women, let's talk about calf implants, which are more popular with men, and perhaps infertile cows, This should probably be on to- day's front page, because for some it will constitute a news flash: a man's calf size falls, in terms of importance in any arena, precisely between the color of Ed MeMahon's toothbrush (er in- deed, anything about Ed McMahon) and the middie name See Inside page 46 ler the knife Jay Society must appease the cosmetic monster “Better that a-girl has beauty than brains because boys see better . than they think.’’ Unknown. “JO ARGUE that we, boys or ‘girls, think better than we see is * futile. oo . . Those .who. choose the moral ~ high ground by standing behind “the ‘don’t-judge-a-book-by-its- cover philosophy should give their ivory-tower judgments a nip here _and a tuck there. . - Elective cosmetic surgery has become one of the many topics seized: upom by — special-interest - “groups determined to make us all ~ live.and experience life in keeping .. with their own limited sensibilities. | | THE EXPERTS By A.P. McCredie News Reporter These people clain: that the moral legitimacy of having part of your nose lopped off, or having a piece of moulded plastic implanted in your chest, calf, or butt is tan- tamount to physical desecration. What, | ask you. level-headed reader, is the difference between someone having. their body sculpted to their liking by a plastic surgeon, and that of sweating for hundreds of wasted hours to get the same result? : ; Think of the money saved in oa . lycra and towel cleaning. Do not be swayed by the claims of the taut-brained. and -bodied’ exercise fanatics who cling to the flabby belief that the only way to gain the perfect body is via pain. As far as I’m concerned, if you feel uncomfortable about your appearance, have the-coin in the bank, and have been. given the best medical advice available, go for it. When asked, ‘‘Should someone remain forever insecure, self- conscious and .unhappy~ about their large nose?,”’ those opposed to these procedures will drip on See Fears page 46 PRINTS CHALLIS & POLYESTER Allin store stock received Prior to April 1, 1993 BUY 1m GET FABRIC An exceliant selection of prints, chambrays, sheeting, wools, sportswear and morel. BUY am My Qi oe Wit COSMETIC SURGERY: is k up to society to provide a means of quelling the deep-seated fears end insecurities of its citizens? aes PATTERNS lo VOGUE, BUTTERICK, McCALLS & BURDA Allin store stock BUY im GET 2 FREE (of equal or lesser value im GET EE (of equal or lesser value)