Doug Collins | ay in court 2 @ gel this straight e “ THE FOLLOWING people ap- Vancouver provincial court May 4: peared in Worth and West Van- Terry Allisonn was fined $100 couver provincial courthouses after the 23-year-old Vancouver recently to face various charges resident pleaded guilty to a charge laid against them. of possession of marijuana. Before Judge J.B. Paradis in North Vancouver provincial court May 12: Miles Alfen Parker was given a conditional discharge and placed Stephen Pears was given a con. ditional discharge and placed on Moro Court Briefs Page 10 . efit he ‘ . > On the North Shore since 1955. (PARTS & SERVICE PARTS & SERVICE FOR Stephen Rogers should look for new employment oppor- tunities, and I have been trying to think of some for him. Unsuccessfully. Pumping gas might be in his line, but he} would spill it. Selling ice-cream is out, too. He would drop the stuff on your shoes. Our famous Minister for In- tergovernmental Affairs looks good, but has to be one of the big- gest buffoons in politics. He keeps mis-speaking himself. It takes a lot of talent to ‘‘deny categorical- ly’? what you said, and then to ad- mit categorically that you said it, except that you can’t quite remember saying it. It’s not that anyone with any brains should object to his Original statement. Immigration and “‘white trash’? may well be responsible for much of Britain’s unemployment, the pogey being so good and there being so many West Indians in the country who would rather smoke pot than work. But a Socred should know that the socialists will pounce on such sayings like stoats jumping on rabbits and that the only way to beat the critics is to face them down. “Poor Stephen’s naiveness was almost charming. He didn’t seem to know that the tape recorder was invented quite a few years ago. He didn’t even know that a politician must never joke with | reporters unless he wants his jokes reported. In cold print, you see, | jokes can often be about as funny as death sentences. One loses count of how many times this guy has tripped over his own bootlaces. | He didn’t seem to kniow he was in a conflict of interest situation § when he was Minister of the En- vironment. During the Socred leadership race, he didn’t know that Bill Vander Zalm would win and said he couldn’t work with ‘him if he did. When the Slam won, he said he could. When he was a kid, he must have been a hop-scotch champ. In the ranks of the inept, § though, he has good company. . Peter Hyndman didn’t know he should not drink $300 bottles of Puilly Fuisse at public expense. James Richardson, then a federal cabinet minister, didn’t know he should not tell a | Maclean’s magazine reporteress over a drink in a plane that before { the white man arrived, the Indians carried things around on two sticks, ha ha. He didn't know, either, that truth is a no-no these days, and that Maclean's would see to it that that litle item became a big scandal. Gerry Ford didn’t know he should not keep falling down steps on airplanes, and that to do so would torpedo his chances of continuing to reside in the White House. Bob Stanfield didn’t know he should not fail football catches on probation for three months after the 21-year-old North Van- couver man pleaded guilty to a charge of possession of cannabis. Tony Wong was given a condi- tional discharge and placed on probation for three months after the 28-year-old Vancouver man pleaded guilty to possession of cannabis. Before Judge J.D. Layton in North Vancouver provincial court May 5: Douglas Rueben was fined $25 after he failed to appear for a MAJOR APPLIANCES Parts Dept. open 9.00 to 5.30 Mon. to Fri, Sat 9 to 5 Major appliance in-nome service 1s as near as your phone. 1629 Garden Ave., North Vancouver 987-2251 Vacuum cleaner parts or bring your cleaner in for servicing. up to when there were cameras around. Rogers should learn some basics, one of which is that a guy should always admit what he has said. In this instance, he should have faced the NDP and declared: “OF course I said it, you nit-wits. And so what!” Pierre Trudeau was good at that. Pil give him that much. He could even say ‘‘fuddle-duddle’”’ in parliament. Pretty soon, people were wearing fuddle-duddle T- shirts. If Gary Hart had had that sort of aplomb in the Rice affair, he would have told the media to get lost and marched on regardless. It would have improved his pro- spects of taking over Reagan’s - job. As far as Rogers is concerned, the question now is not so much whether he can work with Vander Zalm, as whether Vander Zalm can work with him. He used to be an airline pilot. How come he never crashed? x kk q I hereby nominate Shirley Carr, President of the pure-minded Canadian Labor Congress, for the Hate Literature Prize of the Year. Last week, this sanctimonious woman told a Steelworkers’ con- vention, quote: “As a new Canadian citizen you (Bill Vander Zalm) have no right to bring your right-wing fascist ideas into this democratic country.’” J have noticed no editorial cries of rage over this. But I have notic- ed that the lady in question gets awfully worked up over countries like Chile and South Africa. / REVENUE SHARING GRANTS Province aids im sewer costs MUNICIPAL AFFAIRS Minister Rita Johnston recently announced ~ approvals of $6,823,387 in 1987/88 Revenue Sharing Grants for sewer and water systems around the pro- vince. Over $27 million in local economic activity will be generated by these expenditures. The Revenue Sharing Program provides 25 per cent of eligible costs for the projects. An additional $619,643 in sewer and water study grants were ap- proved. These grants are used to plan improvements to existing systems or study the feasibility of new projects. — Classifieds Sell -In announcing the approvals, Johnston emphasized the benefits of sound municipal infrastructure to community well-being and economic renewal. She also pointed out the job-creating poten- tial of these grant expenditures. ‘British Columbia has one of the finest municipal infrastructures in Canada,’’ said Johnston. “These grants will help maintain and improve it at peak levels.’’ Johnston indicated that the grants are very productive expen- ditures of public funds, with far- reaching economic spinoffs. Individual grant allocations will be released when the municipalities have been notified. scheduled court date. 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