« “Page BG, August 26, 1979-SundayNews ; Then you'll be sorry I've been given ‘ae ‘lot o _ odd-ball. -suggestions ~ for columns in the past — but, this one was unique! “Barb, _Write us some to do with your kids during the summer IF YOU CAN'T TAKE A HOLIDAY.” Now what do you suppose I know about this? I turn into the “Wicked Witch of the West” on June 30 and don’t get off my broomstick until Sep- tember. ig on things... - refrigerator door open once more, you die!” —4 My kitchen is a sight. that Ma Kettle would enjoy. From the spilled Kool-Aid to the neat coils of: bologne | rind, it certainly looks lived- in. Have you ever. smelled Puss-in-Boots cat food when - it has sat at ninety degrees for a day? That’s what you get when you are on your | way out the door and you hamburger?” L- wail Plaintively. When daughter - ‘replies, “Three -- and vay" 's- _-dog.”, [burst into tears. —— Have you ever tried to have a bath and found two horse halters, a lead rope ‘and a saddle. blanket sqaking in the-tub? Or found’ ‘your clothes dryer full. of sand? “We got wet on the beach, _Mom, so we _just dried out ‘our jeans!” [ve been -Some-of- my friends have good ideas. One bought a bag of “Ready Mix” concrete iH “f 4 yt Second. _ Nairows: the ‘last thing I'd—yell would: “Don't forget to thaw—th ~~and ier eight-year-old to make himself a statue. It ' -took his older brother four hours to chip the little devil free. Another took her kids to the P.N.E., lost them and ~ ‘picked them up three hours later at the “lost-kids” booth. Meanwhile, she won forty bucks on a long shot-in the fifth race. f steaks for suuupppescr!™ Probably the kids ate the steaks yesterday and forgot - to mention it. . | My husband: ‘comes ‘més home sgt Busband comes home conditioned office. -and _Surveys the mess in the kitchen. Does he soothe me __ by Barbara McCreadie isn’t a real travel question but I didn’t know who ee to ask. My husband and I want to travel abroad but I don’t dare apply for a passport. I have every reason to believe that P'm an illegal immigrant. As far as I know, my parents came over the border with me as a child - from first Germany to Cuba, then to Mexico., and finally we sneaked into Canada. I don't have a birth certificate but I think I was born in Cuha. Both of my parents are dead. i ‘My vocabulary deter- : iorates and begins to include terse phrases such as, “Don’t any of your friends have homes?” and “Tf I hear that - -DEAR™ BARBARA: This ANSWER: If you've lived the whole mess out for you. and worked in Canada for a long time, you shouldn't have any trouble sorting out your problem. After all, it wasn’t your fault that you were brought here as a child. It doesn’t make any sense to leave things as they are because you've probably earned your right to the Canadian old-age pension and a proud Canadian passport.” Get on the phone right away to Government. They'll sort Anxious to travel QUESTION: I am so anxious to travel but my wife refuses to leave the kids. This is practically destroying our marriage. I feel so trapped! Don't get the fdea that I don’t love my kids but Fm damned ff 1 want to walt until I'm retired to see the world. I know that you have a family and still travel. Can - you give me some am- munition? ANSWER: Yes! Suggest that you'll go by yourself! If that doesn't ‘4 get her moving - GO. That may sound like stern measures but it sure beats slinging “ammunition” at each other. I was very reluctant to leave my family in the beginning but I discovered that they were quite able to survive without me for a few wecks at a time. The first trip is the worst and . Lhad some nasty nightmares about little white coffins. We all survived. Well, almost all. The babysitter was doubtful. She needed a few weeks to recover! Inexpensive Portugal DEAR BARBARA: Rather strange that you -—zasked-fov—iniommation._ on. —ogtta—sigh FPartugal since I was about to vicite you about a book I discovered in the local brary. Ie was written five y-:ars ago so the prices will bh: considerably changed. Look for: Beach Holidays from Portugal to Israel, By Melvin and Anita Benarde. The places | they have searched out are off the beaten track, much less expensive ‘and travel agencies would have no record of them. ANSWER: Thanks! I'm off to the library again. We travellers need to use our local passport photos while you wait Norlin Snore Darbsogm rt? censdar 988-9813 libraries a lot more since the costof buying travel. books is library without a notepad and pen!.. Why carry» the whole darn book when you can make all the notes you need in a few minutes? WAIKIKI $369 8 Days, 7 Nighta, Ab & Hote! WAIKIKI $439 15 Oaya, 14 Nights, At & Hotel LAS VEGAS $189 6 Days, 4 Nighta, Ai & Hote! RENO $209 6 Days, 7 Nignta, Ab & Hotei RENO $179 5 Days. 4 Nighta, Ar & trio! CENTA Tours 1666 Robson Street 10507 K. Geo. Hwy. Surrey 689-7117 Rog. Vrevel AGont Ma. 187-2 the Canadian © isit-the—— yell over_your "shoulder, “Don't forget to feed the cats,7 “How many people did. you feed with five pounds of | in no. time flat. C. ; MEMBERS neesee atm crane eigen cee mesons tag ce _ Te NOH Shorea ammranity Credit Union asks all menibers to. searching for: days to find the. kid’ who! “cleaned” the kitchen and put all the dirty pots: in the cupboard _ because there wasn’t room "for them in the dishwasher. Bring along every. document you have when . —+ {! ~ And one’ friend, Ie mother of five, complained sadly, “If I decided to end it all by jumping off the you go for an interview - including old school records, come to their branch to ‘collect their B.C.R.LC. Shares. Fy Shares must be collected prior to 28th SEPTEMBER 1979 Lonsdale Branch 1100 Lonsdale Ave. 986-4321 1247 Ross 980-6556 | With | ‘tender ‘. cOmmiseration? No! 7 hugs .and shakes his head and mutters, ' “We ‘should have a. talk about the housekeeping standards around here!” employment records and even church certificates.” ~ North Shore Community Credit Union Lynn Valicy Branch Marine Drive Branch The Village Branch 1080 Marine Dr. ond 986-1116 3131 Edgemont Blvd. 985-8221 "The Dollar Branch 399 Dollarton Highway North 929-8111 He’ 4