“ee

46 - Wednesday, December 11, 1991 - North Shore News

Q. MY PARTNER is ex-
pecting something I can’t
often give her.

She doesn't want me to
penetrate her unless I have a good
erection. At my age, 52, good
erections aren't 2s easy to get 2s
they once were.

However, [| can penetrate her
when I'm semi-flaccid if ske will
let me. We have to begin inter-
course by moving slowly and
carefully. The action of our
movement then gives me a full
erection and | am fine.

Once I get there, I have no
probiems sustaining the erection
long enough to satisfy both of us.
Why can't she just agree to de
this my way?

A. I don’t know why she can’t
agrce, but if I had her here in my
office, I would ask her. She is
putting. too much emphasis on
your erection. What she should do
is let you penetrate while you are
semi-flaccid.

Perhaps it would heip if prior
to penetration she touched your
penis more. Maybe you need more
manual stimulation from her. Ask
her to help guide you inside her.

“You are very fortunate that you
can get a full erection once inside
her vagina and maintain that erec-
tion during: intercourse. Many
younger men have problems sus-
taining an erection during inter-
course.

You need to. acquaint your

partner with the realities of male
sexuality.

Q. I took yeur advice — and
my husband says I liked it too
much!

Throughout our marriage, |
have had trouble achieving
orgasm. This created some _ real
problems for us for a while. Then
I rerd your advice to another
woman and I tried masturbating
with a vibrator as you told her to
do. Boy, did that work out fine!

I would fike to use the vibrator
sometimes during lovemaking with
my husband, but he refuses. He
finds the whole idea distasteful
and intimidating.

According to him, I should only
use it in the privacy of the
bedroom alone with the door
tocked — preferably when he isa’t
home. How can I persunce him to
change his mind?

A. First, tell him, ‘‘Honey, a
vibrator can never replace your
penis!” Maybe he needs to hear
that. He could feel he is somehow
inadequate because you can do
things with the vibrator he wasn’t
doing for you. :

Some men are intimidated by

the use of vibrators in lovemaking

because they think their partners
are more fond of the little
machine than the penis.

Give him plenty of reassur-
ances, then tell him you will fulfill
one of his sexual requests if he
will try, just once, to include the
vibrator in your lovemaking.

United Way extends campaign

THE UNITED: Way of the Lower
Mainland (UWLM) is extending
its 1991 campaign to year's end,
in- a renewed effort io reach its
goal of $17.5 million, -says volun-
teer campaign’ chairman George
Gaffney, senior vice-president and
general manager of the Royal
‘Bank of Canada. :

He reported that donations ‘‘in
the bank”’ plus estimates of those
still to come .from traditionally
jate donors total $17 million,
which is 97% of the goal.

“his is nearly. $1 million more

than was raised in 1990,” he said.
“At 97% of our goal, we have
still received more in donations
from our community than ever

before, and by any standards that.

must be counted a success. How-
ever, the 3% shortfall represents
$500,000 that our agencies urgent-
ly need to continue their services.

APOL

CEN 40TEn
aoa
USES BOUTERLES

Association of
Canadian Distillers (ACD}
199} Period @ Report

“When we kicked off our cam-
paign on Sept. 24, we had set our
goal at 9% over the $16,053,000
raised the previous year. We real-
ized this wouid be a real chalienge
to achieve, but we also knew our
agencies truly need the money.*”

Despite ‘‘looking down the bar-
rel of a recession,’’ volunteers es-
tablished a very aggressive 6% in-
crease over 1996 donations for the
corporate sector, which represents
approximately 25% of the overall
campaign.

_ Employee workplace campaigns

..account for -just over 60% of
“donations, and Gaffney noted that

goal-setting for this sector was ex-
tremely difficult because of

’ layoffs. being experienced in many

industries, _ particularly forestry,
and unsettling conditions in the
public service sector.

jE

ON:

f ' Heel

FANE
: nic

Dr. Ruth

Westheimer

ASK DR. RUTH

LIFESTYLES
Why can’t she agree to do it h

Use it on the back of his neck
to help relax him and to show him
it isn’t something to fear!

Q. My wife and I need you to
settle a disagreement we are hav-
ing about our son. He has recently
had his ear pierced, which for me
was the fast straw. I was afraid he
had gone gay when he let his hair
grow long and had it permed, but
now I am sure of it.

She says f am wrong. According
to her, his long, pecmed hair and
now his earrings are merely part
of his ‘‘style.’’ Well, I call that
style ‘‘homosexual.””

Our disagreements about this
boy are ruining our own sex life.
She keeps turning away from me
in bed because she’s mad at me.
What can I do about the situa-
tion?

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is way?

A. You can keep your mouth
shut about your son and his hair
and earring if you ever want to
have sex with your wife again!

She is right when she says his
hair and earring are simply ele-
meats of his style. Things have
changed since you and I were
young. I can look out my office
window and see young men wear-
ing their hair every different
length from short to very long.
And some of them wear earrings
and other jewelry.

Besides, his sexual orientation is
really none of your business. It
should have no effect on your sex
life. If you know these discussions
upset your wife, [ don’t know
why you keep having them. And
aren’t such opinions driving a
wedge between you and your son?

mer Sample: P155 80R13 |
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