A, 32 - Sunday, December 8, 1985 - North Shore News

DEAR MISS MANNERS —
I can't decide if I am a self-
ish beast or eminently sensi-
ble and good-natured.
My constant companion
of the last five years and I
have decided to be married.
My problem is that J] would
prefer to get married out of
_ our home town, on vacation,

and announce the faif ac-
compli to our families upon
our return.

I greatly wish to avoid the
fuss that would accompany
even the quietest ceremony
involving our parents. Be-
fore you dismiss me as an
insensitive young pup who

would spoil ail the fun,
ET allow me to state what I
2 think are some good reasons
miss for my attitude.
AJ
manners My companion and I have
: . lived together in content-
Sons ment and ease for three
aoe years. Marriage is a personal
confirmation for us, and we
feel a traditional ceremony
would be inappropriate.
Also, our families are
devoutly Catholic. We are
not, and would rather avoid
the conflicts and hurt feel-
ings that would necessarily
be the result of any ceremo-
ny.
Our respective parents do
: a not get along, and our
i r motiiers are conspicuously
. unadjusted to each other
by J ud. I t h temperamenially.
» Wouldn't it be kinder to
M ar t in all parties if we made every
Tye ny , effort to maintain the
;| C.G.M. SOUND. & COLOR ;
j. “eS ]

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loping is excusable

equilibrium by marrying
privately? We would also
avoid stealing the thunder
from a younger sister who is
planning an orange
blossom-and-limousine
wedding soon.

We assume that if we
elope, while they will still
grumble, it will be behind
our backs and we won't be
bothered. I don’t know my
own conscience on this one.

GENTLE READER — Miss
Manners knows she is always
carrying on about the
necessity for a bridal couple
to realize that the wedding is
not just ‘theirs’? but their

families’ as well. But one
needs an escape clause when
the troubles would outweigh
the pleasures.

That is the justification
for an elopement. Usually,
the parents’ anticipated
displeasure concerns the
wedding personel, but if
religious or social problems
would make the wedding
more trouble than it’s worth,
by all means elope.

In return for justifying
you, she asks tht you look
favorably on any suggestions
either side may have made
about giving receptions in
your honor to commemorate
the marriage.

aarti
a

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Bouyh hye,
Chk

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