LISTENING IS AS IMPORTANT AS SPEAKING

45 - Sunday, November 26 , 1989 - N

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orth Shore News

Everyone can be an effective communicator

WHILE THE Collins English Dictionary defines ‘‘com-
munication’’ as ‘‘a sympathetic mutual understanding,’ our
day-to-day conversations with people often fall far short of

this ideal.

There is, however, a course of-
fered by two local agencies that’s
sure to help participants become
better communicators.

North Shore Family Services and
North Shore Continuing Education
have offered their Comraunicating
Effectively program for the past
two years, often to a ‘‘sell-out"’
crowd of people who say they have
difficulty organizing their
thoughts, getting a point across, or
making themselves understood.

“You have all the resources in-
side you to say what you want to
say,’’ emphasizes imstructor
Deborah Shannon. ‘Like all! skills,
we can practise (communication)
and learn it.’’

Effective commuinication, one
discovers, involves not only speak-
ing well, but listening well. Shan-
non quotes a proverb in her class:
“To listen well is as powerful a
means of influence as to talk well,
and is as essential to all true con-
versation.’’

Class participants are taught
how to listen — good listeners,
teaches Shannen, give their full at-
tention to the speaker, eapress
empathy for the speaker’s feelings,
and ask questions — how to
establish rapport, and how to react
when your ‘‘listener’’ isn’t really
paying attention to you.

Attending Shannon's most re-
cent class were people — mostly

womnen — with a wide Cross-sec-
tion of occupations: an accoun-
tant, artist, architect, secretaries, a
French nanny, government
workers and supervisors.

Their reasons for attending the
class were equally varied. While
some wanted to prepare for a
supervisory role at work, others
wanted to fearn how to say ‘‘no”
without feeling guilty. Some
wanted ta learn how to communi-
cate under stress, while one
wheeichair-bound woman wanted
to gain more confidence and over-
come the stigma often attached to
her physical condition. One
woman had even made a deal with
her husband: if she took the
Communicating Effectively course,
he would take a listening. effective-
ly class.

Also helpful in realizing these
goals is Shannon's Assertiveness
Training course, which teaches
participants to feel comfortable
expressing their thoughts — even if
they are wot necessarily what the
listener wants to hear — in a con-
fident but non-aggressive manner.

Assertiveness Training is also
offered through North Shore Fam-
ily Services, a member of the Unit-
ed Way, and North Shore Conti-
nuing Education. For more infor-

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NEWS photo Cindy Goodman

LEARNING TO establish rapport with your audience — be it compesed of one person or many — is an im-
portant factor in effective communication, as Deborah Shannon (right) will tell you. Shannon teaches tips on
communicating effectively at a North Shore Family Services/ North Shore Continuing Education class that is

often sold out.

mation on communication or
assertiveness classes being offered
in the New Year, call family ser-
vices at 988-5281.