¢ get this straight ¢ THERE I was, trying to take a few pounds off by subsisting on fruit and vegetables for a week (no booze, either), when that new guy Kevin What's-His-Name on CBC TV told me not to eaf the big fat plum I was about to devour. That's what he said. | para- phrase slightly, but what he said was “If you have any fruit that's been imported from Chile, don’t eat it. Traces of cyanide have been found in such fruit.”’ “Where does this plum come from?" asked Grey Eyes. **Chile,’’ she replied. 1 thought about that for five se- conds, and ate it anyway. **What does cyanide do to you?" asked my ever-curious spouse, Chemistry is not one of my strong subjects, but I hazarded a guess. “It can kill you,”’ I replied. ‘‘If you swallow enough of it, that is.” (Hermann Goering, Heinrich Himmler and various other un- popular persons shuffled off their mortal coils by swallowing cya- nide, J recall.) There were, I considered fur- ther, a lot of people who would sound trumpets if I departed this vale of tears. So the next day I had another plum. Also from Chile. If there was any cyanide in it, it had been placed there by left-wing ide- alists, so not to worry. So far I'm still here. Haven't even rushed out to update my will. What will be, will be, as the song says. Which brings me to my theme, which is that we are so afraid of living that fear is killing us. In the U.S., indeed, a writer calied Henry Fairlie has written a book called “Fear of Livine: America’s mor- bid aversion to risk.”* For America, ead Canada. Two little grapes ean bring the continent to a hale. We are afraid to breathe, lest we inhale toxic fumes. We are afraid to press the top of “ewe are So afraid of living that fear is killing us.’’ See shaving cream containers, lest we increase the size of the hole in the sky over Antarctica. Most smokers have been driven into exile. Those who remaii: are confronted by dire warnings on cigarette packages. Skull-and- crossbone signs on wine, beer and liquor bottles are bound to follow. Butter and all other dairy pro- ducts, once considered to be the stuff of life, are now seen as the stuff of death. How’s your cholesterol count? As | write this, there is news on the radio about the dangers of Alar, a chemical that is used to keep apples looking fresh. Apples are joining the noxious weed as killers. You just can’t tell, you see, how much various insec- ticides have penetrated their flesh! Or will penetrate your Nesh! Japanese sushi is dangerous. Worms! Lightly boiled eggs are danger- ous. So are hardboiled ones. Sugar is bad for you. Salt is bad for you. Demon rum is bad for you. Tapwater can be bad for you, too. All kinds of molecules in it. Also, some anti-ecologist may have piddled into the reservoir, just as freedom fighters in Chile are cyaniding the fruit. Jogging was once seen as good for you. But now that too is bad for you. We are beset on all sides. If you want to stay healthy, your only temedy is to stop breathing and eating. In the book Catch-22, Joseph Heller's anti-hero, Yossarian, saw ‘catastrophes lurking everywhere, too numerous to count. When he contemplated the many diseases and potential accidents threatening him, he was positively astounded that he had managed to survive in good health for as long as he had. Each day he faced was another dangerous mission against mortali- ty.”” Have another plum! @ Nutrition month celebrated at LGH MARCH is nutrition month. To celebrate healthy eating habits, a nutrition information display wili be set up in the Lions Gate Hospi- tal main lobby March 28 to 31. Registered dietitians will be on hand to meet the public between 11:30 a.m. and 1 display. According to registered dieti- tians and nutritionists of the Ca- nadian Dietetics Association, prin- ciples of healthy cating to remember include: p.m. at the * consuming a wide variety of oods © taking care to consume less fat © choosing more foods higher in fibre * maintaining a healthy, realistic body weight. SPRING SAVINGS STARTING FROM *19,988 a-wheel steering — P/S, AMIE stereo ROCK BOTTOM PRICES 700 MARINE DR. DA MX6 GT 987: 4458 NORTH VANCOUVER - Friday, March 17, 1989 - North Shore New ‘3 $25,000 FOR PLANNING Squamish gets airport funds TRANSPORTATION and High- ways Minister Neil Vant presented a cheque recently for $25,000 to Squamish Mayor Phil Turner for airport planning in the district. The grant has been provided from the B.C. Air Transport Assistance Program, and will be used to complete the district’s cur- rent airport planning program and to begin recommended — capital works. “The airport is an important element in local economic growth,’’ West Vancouver-Howe Sound MLA John Reynolds said. “This plan should pinpoint the fa- cilities that will be needed in the near future to ensure the orderly development of the community.” The plan will be prepared by the District of Squamish. “Community airports have an important role in the continued development of the ecenomy in this province,’ Vant said. He also acknowledged the work carried out by the Sea to Sky Eco- nomic Development Commission in helping to improve the Squamish Municipal Airport. Midnight-Black Wolf| » Fobert Bateman | *485.00 28-144 x 35-518 This siyned and numbered print is soon to be released by Robert Bateman’s pubdlist er. Because of the strong similarity to his previously published “Clear Night—-Wolves" which currently has a secondary price in excess of $7,000.C0, his “Midnight—Biack Wolf” is very likely to become his most sought-after picture ever. RESERVE YOUR EDITION EARLY! Early Bird orders entitled to special benefits: 1. A $50.00 credit against the cost of framing and 2.A six-month return option for a 100% credit it tor any reason you find you do not wish to keep the picture — framed or unframed. Note Early Bird options available for a very limited period. Delivery: late June. Open Sundays OSTERSON’S FRAMING & ART #113 Bentall 1 -- Lower Mail 505 Burrard Street Vancouver, BC V7X 1M3 Call 684-4585 1324 Lonsdale Avenue North Vancouver, B.C (13th at Lonsdale) Call 988-8102