DouG COLLINS EVERY TIME the CBC suffers a “budget cut,’’ the coun- try’s liberals and leftists organize a concert of yowling and yawping. It is as if bread were being taken from the starv- ing, or as if the country’s children were being sent down the mines. In fact, though, the cuts aren’t cuts. They are merely a brake on increases. It is understandable that left- wingers complain, of course, because the CBC is their territory. They alo pretend that the CBC offers a variety of choice that no Private station can match. Sure. As a friend of mine who follows these things put it: “With the CBC you get a choice, all rigtit: left-wing opinion and ultra-lefit- wing opinion with perhaps just a dash of Marxist-Hippie-Kounter Kuhkture thrown in for flavoring.”’ All it costs you is about a billion bucks a year. ‘About the only thing on CBC Radio that’s consistently good is the music on FM. Most of the rest is guaranteed to send you bye- byes in nothing Slat.”’ I was reminded of that when Gerald Caplan was in town recent- ly and an Evening Wimp writer took pen in hand to direct the ~ Caplan squawks to 2 suffering public. Caplan delivered himself of these amusing lines: ‘““CBC Radio is the lifeline ¢ of Canada ... If you listen to it for a week, you will be the opinion, it seems, that if the CBC docsn’t get all the dollars it wants (but doesn’t necessarily need) “there is a real threat to expression ...."" Is this guy for real? About the oaly thing on CBC Radio that’s consistently good is the music on FM. Most of the rest is guaranteed to send you bye-byes in nothing flat. Mind you, it’s not isi thas Caplan is out beating the dram for the CBC. He’s a former nationa! director of the NDP and for obvious reasons the CBC has © more vigorous defenders than thar party. Even for the NDP, though, Caplan is a hard case. In the 1960s he took a job as 2 university fec- turer in what was then Rhodesia, but he was soon arrested, jailed and deported. All of which, you may be sure, did not take place on account of Bible readings. Later, he gave a speech to university stu- dents in Halifax in which he said that if then Rhodesian prime minister Jan Smith were going to be defeated, ‘‘white deaths is a cross we’re going to have to bear.” Perfect material for becoming a prominento of the Canadian Left. He’s now a “‘Toronto-based public affairs commentator and consultant,”’ co-author of a task force report on broadcasting poli- cy, and beloved by the Toronto Star. It’s a wonder the Balcneyites haven’t made him chairman of the CRTC. He is still full of bright ideas, of course, for he says that if he were boss of the CBC he would an- pounce that the corporation is go- ing to close down a CBC radio or television station in every cabinet minister's riding — the idea being that that would knock some sense into those dreadful penny-pinching Tories. Does he thitsk anyone would miss them? Come off it, Caplan. The public at large wouldn't even notice. But if he meant paying less taxes there would be dancing in the streets. ‘There is one sure way the CBC could save dough. But it’s not - something the Caplans would favor. It could save millions and mil- lions by wiping out the French- lnneusee stations in English Caeoctly how much is spent on those obeisances to bilingualism no one outside the CBC knows because the corporation refuses to provide a breakdown. However, the cost is very large. And for what? So that Quebeckers travelling in English Canada can feel at home, that’s what. In the Lower Mainland, the CBC French TV station has about 500 viewers at peak periods. The radio equivalent has about 300, and for most of the time doesn’t even show up on the ratings. That isn’t the CBC’s fault. That’s the fault of the politicians — Tory, Liberal and NDP. They are mesmerized by Quebec and if the French stations are beaming to ’ no one, so what? In the meantime, let’s hear less from the Caplans about how vital the CBC is to ‘‘Canadian culture.” What they mean is that it’s vital to them @ Bridge turns 100 CAPILANO SUSPENSION Bridge celebrates i birthday speeches, begins at li am. At I p.m. there will be a centennial characters and clowns, balloons, antique cars and period costumes. Admission to the celebration is free of charge to seniors, and children 12 and under who are at- tended by an adult. Two-for-one Centennial passes, valid until Jan. 31, 1990, ave available for $5. One hundred years ago Scotsman George Grant MacKay, with the help of two area natives, built a hemp rope bridge across the 450-foot wide Capilano gorge. The Capilano Suspension Bridge and Park is Vancouver’s oldest attrac- tion and welcomes more than 400,000 visitors annuaily. Razz sniffs down 4 more JUST A week after West Van- couver Police dog Razz successful- ly tracked down three suspects wanted by police for allegedly Tunning off without paying an $8.20 cab tab, the super-snouted hound helped police nab four suspects who allegedly skipped out on a $37 taxi bill early last month. By MICHAEL BECKER Four suspects bolted from a cab at 16th and Argyle at approximate- ly 1:30 a.m. May 6. Razz arrived at 1:49 a.m. and began tracking. The dog first searched east along the beach to 15th Street and north on 15th to Argyle. A man walked out of a yard and on to Argyle. Razz indicated the man to police and the man was arrested. 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