Wednesday, May 15, 1991 - North Shore News — 19 Poetic justice (the GST sequel) CCORDING TO Fourth Place winner and Maple Ridge resident Al Adams’ apologetic letter, his an- ti-GST poem entry was ‘‘not exactly a poem but | think it expresses how things like the GST come > about.” Well, Al, thave some good news and some bad news for you. The good news is that you were wrong about your creation not be- ing a poem. Heck, if you could see what some so-called ‘‘profes- sionals’’ claim is poetry you'd tear the labels off your Fruit-of-the- Looms and send them to the Canada Council with a grant ap- plication. The bad news is that you may not be that far off in your analysis of policy making. But let’s see what the readers think. (By the way, Al did use a naughty word in his entry but it does serve a legitimate purpose.) The Creation by Al Adams in the beginning there was the plan. And then came the assumptions. And the assumptions were without form. And the plan was completely without substance. And darkness was upon the face of the public. And they spake unto their elected representatives, saying, “It is a crock of shit and it stinks’’ And the elected representatives went unto the parliament and sayeth, “It is a pail of dung and none may abide by the odor thereof” Mike Steele BOOK REVIEW And the parliament went unto the caucus and sayeth unto them, “It is a container of excrement and it is very strong, such that none here may abide by it’ And the caucus went unto the Deputy Ministers and sayeth unto them, “itis a vessel of fertilizer and none may abide by its strength’ And the Deputy Ministers went unto the Cabinet Ministers and sayeth unto them, “It contains that which aids plant growth, and is very strong’ And the Cabinet Ministers went unto the Deputy Prime Minister and sayeth to him, “tt prumoteth growth and is very powerful” And the Deputy Prime Minister went unto the Prime Minister and sayeth unto him, “This powerful new plan will actively promote the growth and efficiency of the department and this area in particular’ And the Prime Minister looked upon the plan and saw that it was goad And thus the GST was born. Patrick Kernaghan of Burnaby, on the other hand, found his in- spiration not in things scatalogical but historical, winning Third Place with: Memories Of The Ch’ia Empire by Patrick Kernaghan The history of China is quite long, Milenaia passing since the rule of in Each dynasty has done its share of wrong But Sheng is still remembered for his sin. He taxed the people more than they could pay To scatter monuments throughout the land. When scholars wrote about a bet- ter way, Their books were burnt, and al! their knowledge banned. To still the Chinese memory of that crime Ten thousand generations need have passed. Two thousand years are but a blink of time. The smell of burning books can last and last. No scholars bless, nor history‘s record brooks The man who'd put the GST on books. eee GET INTO THE RIGHT GEAR 681-6302 608 Robson St. AT THE RIGHT PRICE! 688-1077 710 Denman St. 922-0123 1845 Marine Dr, WV Boost your ad budget with co-op advertising Most major manufacturers offer co-operative advertising plans. This means your purchases may nave earned dollars which can pay all or some of your newspaper ad costs. It costs nothing but a phone call to find out about all available co-op advertising dollars you quality for. Tut VOICE OF NORTH AND WEST VaRCOLIV EM news CO-OP ADVERTISING SUNDAY © WEONESDAY + FIDAY Bruce Methven 980-0511 The tolawing poems and ex- cerpts provide a fairly repre- semiative picture of how entrants felt not only about the GST but its originators as well, Taxation, Of Course by V. Kaye There once was a Government Task Force That said taxation’s the sole course they can’t read and write They won't put up a fight At worst they'll just yell ‘til they're hoarse. From The GST by Marvin Good, Clearbrook ... The peasants are used to taxes now Of debt they're never free So hit the road and milk that cow And sell that GST. You won't know Canada when we're through They say in all their glory Their only promise made that’s true; God save us from a Tory. eee 100% FINANCING AVALASLE WITH LOW MONTHLY PAYMESTS (OAC) This Unbelievable Price include Complete Portable Spa ® Beautiful Redwood Cabinet © HOV o7 220V Equipment «50 Sq. Ft. Filtration System m * 4 Therapy Jets + ! Ccl Swirt Jet © Skimmer & Drain * Full Foam Insulation -® Underwater Light Complete Redwood * Bar & 3 Bar Stools ‘OVER 200,000 SATISFIED 4 3 Entry Ste; CAL SPAS CUSTOMERS ¢} Redword Plamers Monday-Thursday Friday ieHey WO 9:30-7:00 9:30-9:00 10:00-6:00 Noon-5:00 CVS OOTTLY A THRILLER by Ira Lavin MAY 16- JUNE 8 CWED. - SAT) 8 PM 986-1351 PRESENTATION Fiouse THEATRE 3rd & Chesterfield, NVan.