46 — Wednesday, May 29, 1991 — North Snore News LIFESTYLES Widower remains wary of his partner’s advances Q. LAST YEAR I fost my wife of 30 years and } am justi beginning to overcome my sorrow. Recently, I began seeing a woman in her 40s. I am aroused by her, and she is open cnough about sex to let me know she shares my passion. But I may have ruined all possibility of any- thing sexual happening between us. Last weekend at her place she tried to seduce me. We got as far as the bedroom, where I stopped the action by saying I didn’t want te do anything then. She cailed the next day and said she felt rejected sexually and would never put me in such a position again. The conversation ended by us agreeing we would oniy be friends. Bat I do want to have sex with her! i want more than her friend- ship. I panicked, because | have never had sex with any woman other than my wife. A. You need to have an honest talk with her o: the two of you will never get together sexually. Tell her you were nervous about making love to her because you fear disappointing her. She will understand. You don’t need to tell! her you’ve only had one partner in life. Q. I am being treated for a sexually transmitted disease which 1 caught from my married jover. His situation is too complicated to explain, but I trust him when he Dr. Ruth Westheimer ASK DR. RUTH says he is in the process of getting a divorce. {am in my late 30s and anxious to get pregnant before it’s too tate. Using condoms isn’! an op- tion for me, because J] want to have his baby. I have asked him to get treated so that we can resume our sex life as soon as possible, but he’s been unavailable to ine by phone at the Office since I made this request. I can't call him at home. He doesn’t know I want to get preg- nant. Do you think he’s avoiding me because he thinks I'll insist he use condoms? A. First, you should ask your doctor to explain how STDs might affect an unborn child! Then, you should talk to a therapist. You certainiy should not teil him you don’t want him to wear condoms. No one should have unprotected sex outside a monogamous relationship! This man has given you no reason to believe you can expect him tc be any more monogamous in the future than he has been in the past. And why do you believe he is in the process of a divorce when you can’t call him at home? Q. My parents’ restrictions on iny life are getting me down! I am a sexually active 18-year-old fe- mate who, still lives at home. My parents don't know I'm al- ready having sex with my boyfriend. Al! their efforts to pro- tect me from getting sexually in- volved ase just makiug my fife more difficult. Should I tell them we're already having sex so they’ back off? A. No, you should not tell them you’re already having sex with your boyfriend! You are 18. If you're mature enough to have sex, you should keep it private. 1 do hope that you are using some form of birth control — and condoms, unless he is not having sex with anyone else. As long as you are living in your parents’ house, they are en- titled to set some rules. Canoe club seeking pullers From page &5 day and pulling in a canoe for half an hour. Next year the club pians to travel to Hawaii to race in an e Huge Selection « Mfg. Clearance 18 mile marathon competition. Other plans include building an Ocean-going canoe for long- distance trips up the coast of B.C. The North Van Canoe Club is also currently raising funds to yy, oe 2 Come Celebrate! Mary's 5th Anniversary at Sole Comfort. Please join us in this special | celebration for coffee and cookies, Thursday, May 30, 10am-4pm build a new canoe house. Anyone interested in joining or supporting the canoe club may contact Michael Billy at 980-1190 or visit the canoe shed at the foot of Bewicke Avenue. 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Efficient, polite, service from people who aim to please. We try to make sure your experience at TacoTime is one you'll want to repeat again, and again. Our staff work hard at being the best--and we appreciate and recognize their efforts. If you're not happy, we're not happy, so let us know. And if you can Suggest how we may improve our service, wed love ° to hear it. Fill out one of our comment cards, We read and evaluate every one of them. Uy) Tacotime’ Puta little spice in your tife! 1811 Lonsdale Avenue North Vancouver, B.C. Le Petit Montessori Academy An enriched BILINGU£i. PRE-SCHOOL offering 4 & 5 day pro- grams for children 3-5 vears old. Our school is conveniently located near Lonsdale & Hwy. #1. We encourage you to register now for the school year 1991/92. CHANGE YOUR LIFE CHARLES, JEAN, JAMES, CLAIRE, JACKIE, TOM, ALICE LEARN HOW TO IMPROVE YOUR LIFE Attend a FREE public presentation, Tues., June 4, 7:30 p.m., §912 Oak St. (at 43rd Ave.) OMNig . 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