27 - Sunday, July 15, 1990 ~ North Shore News Native leader profiled Engaged couples urged to seek counselling WHEN A couple goes to a marriage counsellor most peo- ple’s impressions are that that couple is having problems with their relationship. While often still the case, mar- riage counsellors are also sceing couples who have perfectly good relationships and are thinking about getting married, but are not sure if they should. Registered psychologist Erika Voth, director of the New Hope Counselling Group, says it is ‘‘very important’’ for engaged couples to seek the advice of a marriage counsellor before deciding to tie the knot. “1 think when couples are in a romantic stage they may not be aware of power struggles. It’s im- portant for them to look at mar- riage patterns that could provide stress,’? says Voth. ‘‘I think pre- marriage counselling is a good way to prevent divorces."’ Voth notes an increase in the number of engaged couples seek- ing out pre-marriage counselling. In addition to married and engaged couples, Voth says people who become married for the se- cond and third times should also consider seeing a marriage counsellor to avoid repeating mistakes made in previous mar- tiages. But marriage therapy is not the only kind of counselling New Hope, which opened its doors in North Vancouver in February, of- fers. It also offers individual counselling for depression, grief and loss, stress and anxiety, sex- By SURJ RATTAN os Reporter ual, physical and emotional abuse, vocation, mid-life crises and anger management. Family counselling, substance abuse counselling and mediation counselling for child custody are also offered. The B.C. Ferry Corp. is pro- viding counselling for its employees who witnessed a tragic accident at the Horseshoe Bay ferry terminal last Monday and who assisted in the rescue opera- tion. Voth says it is important for people who witness such incidents to seek out counselling. “It's a crisis type of counselling and it would be important for people to discuss it and the shock of it,’ says Voth. ‘‘There may be some anger attached to it, like, ‘Why did this have to happen’ and it might elicit other experi- ences to allow for the grief pro- cess.”” Voth adds that there may be ‘‘a form of bargaining’’ attached to this type of counselling where the person involved may conclude that the incident may not have hap- pened if ‘‘such and such happen- ed.”’ She says that it is vital for peo- ple involved in crisis situations to express their emotions. NEWS Photo Neil Lucente MARRIAGE AND family therapist Erika Voth (right), the director of the New Hope Counselling Group in North Vancouver, offers counselling help to married couples and says it is equally important for engaged couples to seek the advice of a marriage counsellor before tying the knot. “We must allow for the grief process. People vary in the amount of time they grieve. Some May want to cut it (grief process) off and that would not be healthy.’’ Voth, who has been counselling since the 1970s, says she has seen SPECTACULAR SANDAL SALE OUT THEY GO AT Reg. values from 25.00 — 49.95 Excellent size range. Variety of styles and colors. * CAPILANO MALL AND WHITE ROCK ONLY * SOLE COMFORT. * CAPILANO MALL 984-6681 Happy Feet are Here Again LOUGHEED MALL 420-6889 * WHITE ROCK 15235 16th Avenue (next to Sears) 535-3193 Y SEVENOAKS MALL 853-0737 FAMOLARE PLUS STORE 2547 Heather Street 876-4599 (near V.G.H.) an increase in people secking counselling and adds that while the general impression is that more women than men need counselling, there has been an in- crease in the number of men who are now coming in for counsell- ing. Three counsellors work at New Hope and Voth says she is hoping to develop a team of six counsellors who will specialize in different areas. “Therapy is hard work, ‘but it is important that you enjoy’ your work,’’ says Voth.”’ Le Abbey Cusfomiser 4” Mini blinds Sale ends July 34/90 4877 Marine Drive, North Vancouver Parking in rear FAX: 984-4178 984-4104