“me

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26 - Sunday, August 18, 1985 - North Shore News

Your appetite is your own business

DEAR MISS MANNERS —
Iam a small woman, but not
too small. In fact, 2 get
compliments on being so
tiny and having a nice fig-
ure.

However, several years
ago, I nearly died of anorex-
ia, weighing only 59 pounds.
i'm healthy now, but it has
been a struggle of courage
and persistence.

When I go out to dinner
or attend social events where
food is served, I eat only a
small amount. Always
someone says, aghast, ‘Is
that all you’re going to
eat?” or ‘‘You’ve got to
have more — you reed it’’
and puts food on my plate.

That’s rude, hurts my
feelings and interferes with
my courage and progress in
pasticipating in social events.
No one would say to a
diabetic, ‘‘Here, just this lit-
tle bit of cake won’t hurt
you” or ta an alcobolic,
“Here, have just this one lit-
tle drink.”

E would never take food
off someone's plate and say,
“Hey, you shouldn’t eat that
— you're too fat already.”
Other comments people

make: “Are you feeling all

right?” or “Is there some-
thing wrong with the food?”’

One man took me cut to
dinner and said that his
“*project”” was to fatten me
up and that I’d look really
pretty if I'd put on some
weight.

1 was so sad. Here I was
doing my best to make prog-
ress, and I got criticized. I
told him the truth, and he
was embarrassed and never

FROM TORONTO

ROCK |
ANGELS

formerly the BopCats

NEXT WEEK!
Cafe Okai

asked me out again. I should
have lied. I should have said,
“7 can’t eat much when I’m
seeing my lawyer in the
morning” or ‘‘...whea i’m
finishing the last chapter of
my novel.’’ ft would have
been more acceptable rhan
being honest.

How sad! Can you imag-
ine a man saying to a woman
with a deformed leg, ‘You
should do leg exercises so
you'd have pretty legs’*?

How can I handle these
comments and situations?

TRAVEL

VANCOUVER
TO TORONTO

Daily Depariures

A cal CRN-TA TRAVEL &
980-0321 |

Fd like to be able just to
smile and blink my eyes
sweetly, making no com-
ment.

GENTLE READER -- Un-
fortunately, Miss Manners
doesn’t need to stretch her
imagination to picture peo-

miss

manners

ple attempting to force-feed
the disabled, alcoholics,
diabetics and, indeed,
everybody else.

She knows from. the
anguished complaints in her
mail that it is done alf the
time.

Miss Manners does not,
however, advise you to lie.
This is not from any moral
scruple, but because supply-
ing even a false reason tacit-
ly accepts the premise that
your eating habits are open
to argument.

What you really mean to
say is that none of this is
anybody’s business. We
don’t quite say that blatant-
ly, in polite society, but we
manage to make the idea
clear nevertheless.

if someone puts food on
your plate, firmly hand that

pone
Wed. Aug 22

10 am - 12 midnite~

- Sat. Aug 24
featuring the best of 50’s & 60's
js

NEIGHBOURHOOD } PUB
175 E. First St. North Van.

988-5585

person the plate and ask for
a fresh one. Any comments
about your eating should be

ignored or met with a cold
“} wouldn’t dream of boring
you with my digestion.”

Centre

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