“me es 26 - Sunday, August 18, 1985 - North Shore News Your appetite is your own business DEAR MISS MANNERS — Iam a small woman, but not too small. In fact, 2 get compliments on being so tiny and having a nice fig- ure. However, several years ago, I nearly died of anorex- ia, weighing only 59 pounds. i'm healthy now, but it has been a struggle of courage and persistence. When I go out to dinner or attend social events where food is served, I eat only a small amount. Always someone says, aghast, ‘Is that all you’re going to eat?” or ‘‘You’ve got to have more — you reed it’’ and puts food on my plate. That’s rude, hurts my feelings and interferes with my courage and progress in pasticipating in social events. No one would say to a diabetic, ‘‘Here, just this lit- tle bit of cake won’t hurt you” or ta an alcobolic, “Here, have just this one lit- tle drink.” E would never take food off someone's plate and say, “Hey, you shouldn’t eat that — you're too fat already.” Other comments people make: “Are you feeling all right?” or “Is there some- thing wrong with the food?”’ One man took me cut to dinner and said that his “*project”” was to fatten me up and that I’d look really pretty if I'd put on some weight. 1 was so sad. Here I was doing my best to make prog- ress, and I got criticized. I told him the truth, and he was embarrassed and never FROM TORONTO ROCK | ANGELS formerly the BopCats NEXT WEEK! Cafe Okai asked me out again. I should have lied. I should have said, “7 can’t eat much when I’m seeing my lawyer in the morning” or ‘‘...whea i’m finishing the last chapter of my novel.’’ ft would have been more acceptable rhan being honest. How sad! Can you imag- ine a man saying to a woman with a deformed leg, ‘You should do leg exercises so you'd have pretty legs’*? How can I handle these comments and situations? TRAVEL VANCOUVER TO TORONTO Daily Depariures A cal CRN-TA TRAVEL & 980-0321 | Fd like to be able just to smile and blink my eyes sweetly, making no com- ment. GENTLE READER -- Un- fortunately, Miss Manners doesn’t need to stretch her imagination to picture peo- miss manners ple attempting to force-feed the disabled, alcoholics, diabetics and, indeed, everybody else. She knows from. the anguished complaints in her mail that it is done alf the time. Miss Manners does not, however, advise you to lie. This is not from any moral scruple, but because supply- ing even a false reason tacit- ly accepts the premise that your eating habits are open to argument. What you really mean to say is that none of this is anybody’s business. We don’t quite say that blatant- ly, in polite society, but we manage to make the idea clear nevertheless. if someone puts food on your plate, firmly hand that pone Wed. Aug 22 10 am - 12 midnite~ - Sat. Aug 24 featuring the best of 50’s & 60's js NEIGHBOURHOOD } PUB 175 E. First St. North Van. 988-5585 person the plate and ask for a fresh one. Any comments about your eating should be ignored or met with a cold “} wouldn’t dream of boring you with my digestion.” Centre Why Pay More! 1” Mini-blinds Vertical Blinds Woven Woods Pleated Shades Our Prices on high quality custom made blinds are 70 55 0%... than the retail prices of our major competitors By: Levellor, Abbey, Elite and. Jackson Custom Drapery Fabrics On all fabrics, sheer voile, sheer linen, boucle, velvets, | 20-30% =. == Re-upholster Now! Save 15-25% B25. Quality guaranteed European craftsmanship 40 years experience FREE ESTIMATES 3050 Mountain Hwy. Established 1968 988-1525, 988-1220 Mon.:- Fri. 9:00 - 5:30 Sat. 10:00 - 5:00 N. Vancouver