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MANY YEARS ago, the irrepressible Jack McParilin,
whose sarcasm and biting satire reverberated with the pitch
of kis Yamaha organ, was holding court in the Red Barrel

Room of the Hotel Vancouver.

Among his guests that night was
the controversial Minister of
Human Resources, William N.
Vander Zalm and his charming
wife Lillian. For McPartsin, this
presence was an opportunity similar
to a fisherman hauling in a prize
tuna.

After acknowledging the honor-
able minister, the entertainer asked
his audience: :

“Do you know why the Dutch
wear wooden shoes?"’

There beirg no reply, McPartlin
said: ‘It’s to keep the
woodpeckers off their heads.””

Jokes based upon the differences
in humanity are as old as time. It is
part of maturity to accept good
natured jest. The words,
themselves, are not the issue. It is
the inter’ behind the words.

Just as it appeared as though the
premier was starting to climb back
into control, an ili-timed joke has
done him in. It was mild compared
to the self-deprecating Jewish
humor tossed forth by comedians
Alan King, Myron Cohen and
many others. And it is probably
true that a Jewish friend told it to
him.

Was it racist? Perhaps. Was it
insensitive? Certainly, in view of
the Michael Levy incident the day
before. Was it an intelligent thing
to do? It was disturbingly
unintelligent.

What seems to have been
overlooked by reporters is that the
premier used exactly the same joke
at the end of August in a speech to
a fuli Agrodome hosted by the
Pacific National Exhibition. There
was no controversy. .

There was no laughter either, It
wasn’t funny. You'd think the
premier would at least know when
to discard a poor joke. That same
night at the Agrodome, he tried
another bit of humer. Not only did
no one laugh, there was visible
embarrassment and audible
groans. The subject was AIDS.
The story he told was not vulgar or
even mildly off-colored. But the
exercise was alarmingly insensitive.

ee

It is obviously time to create a
Ministry of Humorous Injury to
determine whether Scots are really
cheap, the Chinese inscrutable
(and great at math!) and the Irish a
nation of drunks who are prepared
to die fisst and determine the just
cause at a later date. The only true
democracy is in Italy, where every
male of the species subdivides inte
two political parties.

It might further be argued that
India and people of Indian extrac-
tion throughout the Hindu, ortho-
dox Moslem, Ishmaeli, Buddhist
and Christian world, have grown
weary of diversity, and come to
Canada where they can unite under
the common title ‘‘Paki,’? —
whatever that charming geographic
stupidity is supposed to mean.

Rosemary Brown, in a recent
speech, said she yearns for a day
when people will not ask her
children *‘where did you come
from?’ This seems to be less of a

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problem than being told where to
go?

My Ministry of Humorous Inju-
ry would have a law against calling
a certain neighborhood in Van-
couver ‘‘Japtown.’’ Some well-
intentioned people are inclined to
call the Powell St. area Japan
Town (nice ring to it, huh?). On
formal occasions, we can call it
“Japanese Town’’ or, just to make
sure conversations don’t go by
quickly, ‘‘The Place Where Japa-
nese People Used to Work and
Live.””

We could get Chief Bob Stewart,
Ted Ohashi (Irish, I think) and Joe
Cohen to form a committee on this
puzzler. We may not get a good
name, but we could float an honest
stock underwriting and sell it in the
SONY store.

A friend of mine once was ac-
cused of racial discrimination. In-
dignantly, he replied:

“‘That, sir, is an outrageous
lie.””

“*] hate them all equally.’’

**#*

When we see headlines such as
those emanating from the Social
Credit convention, it should give
one cause to reflect. Bill Vander
Zalm is the antithesis of a racist.
Few would argue with Gim Huey
for calling the highways minister
“not too bright.’’ Neil Vant is not
a racist. In fact, it must be an

agonizing search for him to find
anyone he could consider inferior.

There was no malicious intent. |
doubt if many votes wil! be lost
because of the words uttered. Yet
it reinforces a concern that the
government is careless, sloppy, in-
sensitive and immature.

ed

Along the same lines, but a na-
tional reality, is the never-ending
debates about the French fact in
this country and in the province of
Quebec, in particular. It would
appear that Meech Lake is facing
radical surgery. Many oppose the
constitutional deciarution that
Quebec is different.

Its language is different. its
structure of law is based on the
Napoleonic Code. The province
has its own income tax and pen-
sion plan. The atmosphere is
unlike anything else in Canada.

Quebec is a cultural island
within a sea of English-speaking
peoples. While its borders and
autonomy remain intact, it is being
eroded as commerce drains off to
Toronto and New York, and tal-
ented and educated young
Quebecers seek their fortunes
elsewhere.

Why is it too much for us to
concede a small legal advantage to
a province that is combatting so
many circumstantial disadvan-
tages?

Don’t blame the people of
Quebec for the grandstanding of
politicians who try to buy their
votes with dollars, bilingualism
quotas and cosmetic supporte

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9 - Sunday, November 5, 1989 - North Shore News

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