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By JAMES A. TAYLOR |

“Think of someone you’
haven't forgiven,”” said the
voice from the pulpit.

‘That was easy. IT knew
somcone who had caused me

‘Forgiving means taking

the burden from ‘the other.

person onto yourself, to help
him or ber.

eT
“You'd like to be free of
that burden. That's why

you're finding it so hard to

- forgive — why we all find

forgiying hard to do.

want to commit myself to a
continuing association with
him. That was a burden |
would rather. forget. ‘even
without forgiving.

The second insight came
from a pastor in Kenya. His~
words leaped out at me from
a magazine ! happened to

‘t easy | -

person docs to another, but
‘is the breaking of a re
lationship. **Both the offend-
er_—and” the offended are
equally guilty... If someone
Wrongs you. you have the

obligation to rebuke him. If

he repents, you have the
obligation to forgive him....""

- quien.

a portion of the guill — |
shared in his ‘‘sin’*. because
for too long I had failed to
“rebuke” him, 1 had kept

lo avoid causing
dissension.

mi

‘Bur at the same time. it
was arelief. The burden for

forgiveness is not entirely:

mince. He too has “a part to
play. loan’: forgive him until
he is ready to be forgiven. I
must wait.

ing Editor,

at

whether either of us
likes iW or not. «<>

ship.

No. forgiveness isn't easy.
lt doesn’t get you off ihe
hook at all. -

No wonder most of our
forgiveness is. limited to
those who really don’ t need
to be forgiven.

Written for this newspaper
by James A. Taylor, Manag-
The United

all kinds of problems during
the past three years, and who

had. | thought. brought
disrespect to. an entire
organization.

“*Now think of how you _can
go to that person, and forgive
him.” the instructions conti-
nued.

And ‘suddenly. “Twas hung
up. stuck int a- ‘dilemma that
seemed to have no solution. |
couldn't go to that ‘person
and forgive-him + and not if
forgiveness meant accepting
his past -atlitudes and_beha-
viour. Not if it meant that he
was going t go on harming
those he worked with.”

Certainly, it seemed wrong
to hold a grudge against him,
10 go on, working against his
continucd presence in that
organiZation.

Bin it seemed much more
wrong, to let him continue.

And vet there's always
that terrible feeling. that
refusing to forgive someone
Fis un-Christian. Jesus said
there should be no limit to
the number of times vou
forgive someone. “Not just
| seven times.) he said, “bur
Foseventy times seven.” He
even asked forgiveness for
those w ho crucified him.

What should | do?

Two people have helped
me. '

One was a student minis:
ler. 'Forpivencess doesn't
mean washing your hands of
a situmnion.” she explained.
“In the Bible. the rich man
who forgave the debt his
servant owed him didn't get
off casib. He fost that
moneys. He took the servant's
debt upon himself.

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She was right. | didn't

pick up. In the Bible. he said,
sin is not something one

That too was tough to
hear. I told me that | carried

In that sense, we're stuck
with’ a continuing relation-

Church _ Observer, 85 St.

™

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—~_

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