- QUESTION: late: -husband was -one__of them and Lam still. torment- ed by the horror of. it all, and -y “grief: and. “yemorse. - wish Uhad been able to read . that: article years. ago! ‘Just How i after reading | ‘the article, I s2:. vour answer toe a reader’ s a question that. the only person. you feared. was: your: dentist.” One ofthe reasons. dentists : commit: suicide is because so" may of: their ‘patients: ‘fear, . and therefore,. resent them. we, dentist . 8, Please try to: counteract the . because’ a ‘must . _ cause: a -attitude. that. discomfort times. pain, feared. Why. not respect him for trying to do the very: ‘best "he can? As this. same: article —points. out, most dentists. are . hag-ridden: by their ‘drive to ~- be perfectionists. en ae - STEWART: was. _asked- was; greatest. “fear like mine,.. ‘related to: nuclear war?” My _ thoughtiess “answer: - was, ‘No, ra dentist In. the” ‘Septem: i. ber. October. issue ‘of: ‘QUEST. magazine. there is an article | 7 [pp48-50] - on why ‘sO many ue dentists: commit. suicide. My_ - ‘work “well, gracious, patient, concerned. * manner ‘in -which: he: coped EGA that: he is to, be. n he question 1 : ‘Is your: ; “QUESTION: A a | weeks ago, ‘you, referred - to: own. ‘personal _ fears -and | prejudices and- aggressions: “are:-more’ frightening. toime ~ than are the. horrible: things: ‘that can, grow: out. of them: such as nuclear war, oe in the world except “that series of appointments’ for ‘dental. work: ‘were a. Part. of omy) life’ ‘at thetime “I was. writing | this Catan ane Iwas | i “but “for. .with me, an anxious. patient. dentist one little bit. like, in me, not in my dentist. You misquote me in saying I. wrote thatthe only person I ‘feared way my dentist, but - even so, I. feel badly | about : the © irresponsible answer 1 did make. ° -ouple of the nervous... ‘condition ‘that : manifests itself in ‘agoropho- there: are. § ‘bia and. you. ‘recommended a> useful. book. Did you know "chapter of “SECURE”? avail- able. to: peole. who are | : “endea youring, to’ cope. with rin ",What has all ‘that to. ao! with the dentist?.. Not: a thing or “doing it eae his a Freelance Counsellor ‘Hayden: 1 don’t fear or resent’ my. Idon’t — - counselling. | His. new oftice. in ‘the Plaza ‘ International . Tuesdays only}. for ‘convenience of oe Shore - a WHEY : shelpful.. For example,. if.you : agorophobia? eR STEWART: Yes, I did know - about. “SECURE” and that ~ groups | about: Greater. Vancouver. If. - any. reader. is eager. to follow | -that there: is. a North Shore. “up. on’ “help © available to “agorophobics, call me and’ I. will give. “you: a. “number. to GUUUREDEEWANORULIUE. individual, . Hotel -fopen. _Fesidents. = 7 “ several now, rf know = you can’t just el and stay h home. So how — 2 ot ‘Stewart - may be ‘reached © ato 261-6242 for appointments. for... ‘family — ‘or: Group ° . the a" a STEWART: | ‘Would | you, be. - surprised to learn that a lot of _.people-have: said almost the same_ answers “never satisfy “me, but here goes. Pay. attention: ‘to some other: interests and - concerns and responsibilities a: that. you ‘have and see ‘if =— thing” to me? | “tell - you. _anything are. well off, ‘financially, you: “can. study’ your. twin’ yens_ . with: ‘a. different. degree ‘of: ~. practicality. than. _can. ‘the - person who is in a: financial . squeeze. If you are loaded, it. _ . would. make: good sense to. “ travel” first, “while. “you” ‘ate ‘young and not too tied:to a home’ base, However, if you. ‘sense _to- concentrate. on: establishing your: home. and. giving yourself ‘time: to. work | toward” the travel goal ‘for. . later. on. As bee ‘an: ‘opinion “of it a “My | what do: you ‘think ‘of Parents who. have that: beok?. . parents y _ obligations: . Most -important of. all, your. “and plan your. life. If travel is’ - ONLY an: impulsive _ sort of. are not-well-off (and‘E'mean. - “really well-off): it seems good » "QUESTION: While visiting . ‘friends "whe “have: ‘small. children Tran across a-book | ‘that was sitting. out in ‘plain . view of visitors like. myself, and in. plain. view of the kids. - ot. was ‘unbelievable. “that ~ > amyone would’ not’ keep that - _ Book out of reach’ or. burn’ it. ‘Its. called. SHOW: ME: and goes: into: nauseating details of sex with ¢ extremely explicit yours ‘and that is: why. ‘they value. the book: and | you: call it “nauseating: “It seems. to: me_ . ithe book: is utterly useless. to you, and. : perhaps. “even” harmful. But ‘to your. friends ‘it! maybe used.-in. a most positive and creative “man- ner. Iam acquainted with the ~ book - ‘and have it ‘in my library. It was given. tome by. . a young woman who «said, _ It’s so beautiful, I thought iat 1. -you would like to have -it” “But: pe : “pl finances. But be. sure, ‘to. th look: at all aspects: of your: life “and- your - >For | life-goals. : _ example; your. ‘child; “your. ‘husband's. work, your. valid. ‘and, . perhaps ability: to be. ‘self-disciplined. hunger. you .have, are’ you _ableto. put it in-its place, and to” Sex, S - to . you; may be _iinnatural or even dirty and | » something that should. never be talked about. If that is the * case, then obviously SHOW — -ME is.a terrible book for you and: ‘you. would. do better not ‘to own: it or read it any more. : That doen’t. mean: you are “behind ‘the times" or that “your” neighbour | is “up. to “Gate”. It just means you are . diffe er nit, one from the other. f PL gen ate subject, you may want. to. think it. out ‘or ‘talk it over. But if you are not “at. all curious - let her have — HER books. and you have YOURS. Incidentally, | the last part of the book tells the reader how to_use it ‘So. its values can’-be- shared. . Did you. read that. part? we tell it to sit there and_ wait me until you ‘are’ “ready?” ‘Pay © Joes attention to: your’ very. OWN best. ‘self: and. keep. ‘saying... eae Yes" to. it. wo CORDOBA, CHRYSLER, mpooce TRUCK C OR 1978 LE BARON! i ¢ Buying 0 or Leasing) The : ‘4, t “Remember: if ‘you dont ‘Money You' Save ‘Will Be Your Own, Ba Mate a "buy: Re tad rom: ‘Us: you, may ‘pay: too’ much!