NO STANDARD AVAILABLE

CS - Sunday, December 2

, 1984 - North Shore News

poy

Ecumenical greetings please all

EAR Miss Man-
ners: | am a
non-practising
Christian married to a
non-practising Jew.
During the hohdays | send
my in-laws a Hanukkah card
(because they expect one

Ci 3

... Sldestep
the issue of
marking one
holiday or
another, and
send winter
greetings to
those who do
not celebrate
Christmas.’’

trom their son), a Christmas
catd (because we have them
made with photographs of
the family) and a Christmas
present, although | don’t ex
Pest one in return

Now that [’ve worked out
that ritual to my. satistac-
tion, my mother wants to
know what kind of card- -
Hanukkah of Christmas---
she should send my in flaws
Does one send a card accor
ding to the holiday observed
by the sender or the recenver
ot the card”?
GENTLE

vOut

READER: As
ecoummenical customs
seem to work. Miss Manners
does not oppose them And
in this case, you could sim-
ply ask ovour husband's
parents which thes would
preter

But you should be aware
that you are dealing here in
non-prachising customs, as il
were The reason Miss Man-
ners Cannot give yOu a firm
answer is that there as no
all-purpose standard.

There is no one Jewish
way of dealing with the tact
that a Christian holiday ois
celebrated as oa national
holiday ino Ametica There
are Jews who ignore it en

tirely. and Jews who treat i
aS oa non-religious winter
holiday, the origins of which

are, in tact.
Christia nits

older than
There are also a
range of practices in be-
tween, in regard to specific
folk customs of Christmas,
such as presents, cards and
trees

In addition, there is a dit-
ference of opimon about
whether Hanukkah ts
Observed traditionally, or
made into the equivalent of
Christmas with
ding trappings
might

correspon
A Jew who
consider it inappro

miss
manners

by Judith
Martin

priate tor a Christian to send

him oa Christmas card may

-THIs Is A

Out C00 late What PFD stands for
Personal Floatation Device
More visible from a distance
Walerin cold water a PFD will '
Keep you afloat more comfortatly
Thana litewacket Play it Safe.

ea dare Reed Cross Souer,

quite possibly care even less
for Hanukkah ecards, on the
grounds that they are not a
Jewish custom but an ob-
vious adaptation of a Chris-
tlan one.

In view of all this, Muss
Manners cannot unders-
tand why one does not sim.

ply sidestep the issue ot

marking one holiday or
another, and send winter
greetings to those who do
not celebrate Christmas
This cannot possibly offend
anyone, as there is a general
agreement in November and
December that itis winter

DEAR MISS MANNERS:
My husband and | are con-
fused about tipping in-
dividuals with whom we
Have negotiated a price tora
Service We travel and
understand hotel and restau-
tant tps, but when we take a
bus tour ofr a. private
heheopter thyht, da we tp

PFD.

And last year 900
Canadians found

the driver or pitor? dno our
home do we up the man who
trims the trees, the men who
put) on the roof or ther
bosses, or the woman who
measured our drapes?

GENTLE READER: Tipp-
ing has long ceased to be a
matter of expressing a tinan
cial opinion of the services
rendered. All tt means now
is that part of the expected
wages for certain yobs are
paid only at the discretion ot

the client

At any rate, the pods vou
mention are not those with
which tpping is associated
Tipping, when uo unex
pected. is sometimes taken
as an insult---although extra
money in a business situa-
tion never is. All vou have to
do, if sou want to show
Special appreciation of a jo
well done, ts to callita bonus
(Copyrweht, 1984, € nited
Feature Svadicate, Ine}

—

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THURS.-FRI. 10 AM -9 PM
SUN. 11 AM -5 PM

120 Pemberton Ave., N. Van |
Tel. 980-2970

JUST BEFORE
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