Wile fears feelings might ecome evidence in court RECENTLY MY husband suggested that he and I attend marriage counselling, which made me extremely suspicious. I know he has a girlfriend and for the fast three years of our 12- year marriage he has refused every request | have made for marriage counselling to assist us in ironing out the problems of our marriage. We have four children, ranging in age from 242 to nine, whom J Selieve he will try to take if we separate. if I didn't believe our separa- iion was inevitable, bearing in mind my husband’s behavior towards me in the last two to three years, | would be more than willing to take the chance and enter into a meaningful counsel- sing session. “I do believe, however, that it is a ploy by him to have a third par- ty Kisten to my inner feelings and hear my concerns about the mar- riage, the children and my hand- ling of the children in the past. I have been in everyone’s ex- pressed opinion a very kind and devoted mother to my children. There certainly was a time when my husband ignored the children, and five years ago I was frustrated and angry and I acted inappropri- atciy at times toward the children. For instance, on one occasion only, I spanked my oldest child on the buttocks and left a very faint bruise which has made me feel upset since the incident occurred. In addition, I have very orivste feelings as to my parents’ treat- Family Affairs HUGH STARK KIRSTIE MACLISE ment of me and in fact my feel- ings tewards my husband from time to time. My concern is that if my hus- band leaves me and tries to get custody of the children, he will use the information I have disclosed ia the marriage counsel- ling sessions against me, and yet 1 know that if I am to enter into meaningful counselling in order to save my marriage, I must do so with a complete openness. What should I do? Nt is very difficult 10 answer your question, not knowing you or your husband. Symbiotic friendship grew From page 43 average. of 2,294 clients month on the North Shore. Originally sponsored by the Victorian Order of Nurses, the homemaker program provides assistance with personal care needs, meal preparation, and househoid management. Services vary from daily live-in help to weekly or twice-monthly assistance. Financial assistance is available from a variety of gov- etnment-sponsored programs or the service can te provided pri- vately. For more information call the program coordinator, Hilary each King, at 984-9511. National Home Support Week, proclaimed by B.C. Lt.-Gov. David Lam, concluded on Oct. Seeing Mohamed and Horne together, it is evident that the symbiotic relationship they have developed has long ago shed the worker/client robe. When asked how they look upon one another, the answers are the same. “We're friends.”’ And we all know the next best thing to seeing a candle burning in the window is the knowledge that a good friend waits inside. Perhaps you should discuss your fear of counselling with your priest, minister or family doctor, provided they are familiar with both your husband and yourself. Failing, any of those profes- sionals knowing you and your husband well enough, we would sugges! that vou pick your most respected friend and briefly set out your concerns to him or her and ask for an opinion in the hopes of gaining some objectivity. If. of course, your friend is of the belief that your Husband is go- ing to leave. then vou snould be very careful about entering into marriage counselling with him. There are conflicting decisions in this province as to the privi- leged - nature of information disclosed during marriage counsel- ling. One of the most recent deci- sions would indicate that there is little or no privilege attached to any information disclosed during the sessions, so that you would have every right to feel apprehen- sive about disclosing information to your husband and a counsellor. Unfortunately, the decision to which we refer substantially unset- tles a body of jaw that served the continuing institution of marriage very well. People should be able to enter into family therapy to save their marriages without fear that disclosures made during the course of the sessions will be used against them. At the moment that might well not be the case in our courts. IT am a 50% skareholéer in a corporation with two other peo- ple. Unfortunately, at the present time I am going through a mar- riage breakup and my wife of nine years is attempting to alienate my business partners from me. The company was incorporated approximately 10 years ago and has prospered because of the per- sonalities of the three shareholders See Commitment page 48 © Bigg on Eve The long awaited expansion of the Ron Andrews recCenire is now complete! Highlights indude: #3550 square feet of new space 88 Skylights and wall-to-wall windows moke il brighter thon ever! Eight new weight training machines A i New family change rooms Newsteam room Whether you're starting out, or already training seriously, recCentre Andrews has something for you. For i membership into or a consultation call 967-PLAY. prightet, ond | a | KV-277S35 28” Trinitron Monitor/Receiver © tiuner Pip (with swapt © Surround Soure * Espancea AY Window . Spates onolt syricn * MTS storeo @ Front panei ASV inputs * AV irours (2) S-Video ¢ Cnannet captionicnarnel guicie * Programmuble tmericnannel diock AMY '02 Unwversal remote SONY SLV-494KF HiFi VHS VCR * Remote Control SORY Siv-SeSHF HiFi VHS VCR « Retnate Cuntrol © Dual Azmuth 4-head * HF: Sound * Gualsnode snuttie fi ual error message =" $549 SONY KV-207S27 21” Microblack Trinitron * MTS Stereo Reception © Variapte Audio © AN orput © OnOr! TimetiCh Block © AN Window * Sleep Timer 5569 « Remote Control © Qua: Azmutn 4-head eHiFi Souna ¢ Quarmoge snutile * Bingual error message * Front =" $499 ‘92 PATHFINDER XE 4 DOOR SE 4 door A/C, V6, ENGINE AIC, V6 abs brakes engine, 9808 "35,888 ALL PRICES INCLUDE FREIGHT. 493 NISSAN ALTIMA § Me, HERE NOW! TEST — | DRIVE ONE TODAY ‘92 SENTRA CLASSIC DELUXE ‘5902 10,388 COME IN AND SEE WHY NORTH SHORE RESIDENTS GET MORE FROM Morrey! CONVENIENTLY 3 «LOCATED 5 MINUTES R FROMTHE 2ND NARROWS 5 AT WILUNGDON AND LOUGHEED, SURNABY YOUR COMPLETE NISSAN CENTRE EXPERT FACTORY i FACTORY TRAINED TRAINED BODY SHOP SERVICE TECHNICIANS PERSONNEL FIX YOUR | TO KEEP YOUR VEHICLE t NISSAN RIGHT, THE RUNNING LUKE NEW FIRST TIME INSIST ON THE BEST [294-2908] [291-7261 [291-7261] |