& = Sunday, January 26, 1986 - North Shore News

Doug Collins

e get this straight ®

Ff wish tae God some: sift would gie Us,
. Tae see ourselves as ithers see us!
(Thanks but no thanks, Rabbie. )

| ALL THE gossip. about your ‘man Doug being a
“racist. is now disproved. Why, only the other
evening I was rubbing shoulders with the ethnics,

_it being Burns. Night. Not only: that, but I donn-

ed the proper. garb.

The Media Watch harpies
“should be pleased to hear

gg)
that I’ve even taken to the
Gaelic. (We. hae meat that
. ‘ye can eat...’”.)
“As I told ‘the Ambleside

“Lion’s Club on Wednesday, .

‘they: having - been . foolish
enough to invite me to their
Burns : Night, some of my
best frierids are Scotch: Mr.
Glenlivet, : Mr. . Ballantine
_and Messrs: Haig, to men-

on omy at few. So how.can

Highland apparel began
with an invitation’.to the
Socred Burns Night at the
North Shore’ Winter. Club.
(Having achieved a real

staste for haggis, 1 would

have. gone to. the NDP
Burns Night, too, if they
had one, but they forgot to
invite me.) ;

When I told Gray Eyes
about my kilt: brainwave,
she was less than ‘en-
thusiastic. ‘You're too
fat,’ she said.

Did you ever hear such
silly prattle? ‘‘Awa’.wi’ ye,
woman.’ Besides, I wasn’t
too fat to be kicked out of

bed the other night when .

someone thought there was
a burglar downstairs. Oh
dear no!

All Scots: are nice, but ~
.Mr.. David Blair of Dollar- -
ton is especially nice. He .
me. his -

not - only lent
glorious: regalia (tartan of-

the Grahams of Montieth), “

but. also provided instruc-

tions on how to tie all the -
__ bits and pieces together and.

MR. HAGGIS. himseif, Doug, Collins, . pores for Robbie
Burns Day: in: traditional Scottish attire. Note the dagger

stuffed in Colliu’s s sock to keep his wit sharp and to ward off.

ntique and" contemporary jewellery: gold”
rings, bracelets, pendants, earrings, - . §
stone si fling silver, over 150 :

: Bie Feb. ‘4tst 10 a.m. to noon .-
Sun,;Feb, 2nd 10 a.m. to noon
_Mon. Feb. ‘3rd'4 p.m. to 7 p.m.

NEWS photo Terry Potera

gave me his clan’s history.
So. it was no ignorant clot

. that marched to the haggis-

tasting, I can tell you.

At home, alas, my sar-
torial endeavors were not
greeted with the dignity
they deserved. When I came
down the stairs, looking, -I
thought, just a bit like Bon-
nie’ Prince Charlie, ‘Gray
Eyes collapsed all over the
hot spuds. And. Son
Number One asked when
the baby would be born (an
unfilial reference ‘to my
midriff). - .

‘*The jacket’: s too
small,’ said. my | ever-
helpful lass.

“Mr. Blair says it needn't :

be done up,” I shot back.
“And he knows. Scots wae
hae!”’ -

There was a littie confu-

sion over the kilt. thought, }
wrongly, that I should get |
to show my knees. But.’

when the kilt was above the

knees, its waistband came

up to the armpits. And who

“ever saw a Jock with his kilt.:
‘around his © neck,

when he was tiddly?. 7

So the knees had to be”

covered up. Pity, because: I

have really. sexy” knees: -
. Everyone says so. But.now : f°
that my dress looked like an

: HE CORPORATION. OF THE: oe
‘DISTRICT: OF WEST: VANCOUVER.
HIGHWAY. EXCHANGE: AND.
RELOCATION BY-LAW NO.

3261, 1986

NOTICE is hereby given hat the Council of The

-* Corporation of the District of West: Vancouver. in-
: “tends by the adoption of “HIGHWAY. EXCHANGE:
- AND: RELOCATION. BY-LAW _NO..3261,-1986”, -

: pursuant to Sections 574. and 578'of the. Municipal

~ Act; to close a portion of highway at the north-west’
~ Gorner of the intersection of Marine Drive and 20th =

Street in West Vancouver, B.C.,in exchange for land « :

0.61 metres in width along the north boundary oft
_properties at.2047, 2063, 2079 and 2031: Marin

Drive and 653-20th Street, in order to widen the tane
‘between Marine Drive and Esquimalt Avenue con-:
‘ necting 20th, and 21st Streets.

: “AN enquiry by any member of the public should. 2
- be directed to the undersigned.

2tE0 STREET. °

J.D. Allan,
Municipal Clerk

1986 January 14

except °

evening gown, sniggered
Gray Eyes, attention would
be diverted from the tiny
jacket. (In future, she can
go after the burglars
herself.) ‘

. Needless to say, the

North Shore Winter Club. .
-had never seen anything like

it and I was a smash hit.
When I made my entrance,
lassies shrieked and the

guys at the bar ‘dropped

their drams. There hasn’t
been such a sensation since
Claudius made his horse a
senator. -(You-know-who -
had predicted that the»
whole rig would fall apart
as'soon as the band struck
up, butushe was,
disappointed. Dd. .

1 think ri. mix: c with the:
ethnics again.. There are no.

“better -: “friends than. the

Scotch! a:

Model‘ES. :
"20 Va" Hx16i4 Wx1
- 154 Ibs. - 1 tray, 7 “shelt--
“1. hour heat endurance

: sugg. retail $433.00

«2 Hourch
“.2 Sugg. retail $564