24 - Sunday, June 16, 1991 ~ North Shore News

The elderly must have right to decide

“T DON’T think any of us
thought we were going to be
old. In your 80s you're not
too bad, you can carry on
... Pd still like 10 g0 and
dance sometimes.”’

Last year, Eva MacKay-Smith,
at the age of 92, decided’ she
would move from her apartment
in Vancouver’s West End to West
Vancouver Kiwanis Lodge, a
Jong-term care facility. She had
already postponed the decision
several times.

“It took me a long time, my
family wanted me to move in
about three years ago ... I just
didn’t want to because | was hav-
ing a really good time ... I went to
New Roots and the Stroke Club
and the ViP ... it meant { had to
give that all up. But I was getting
tired and it was best tht I come
here.**

A tmajority of Canada’s elderly
live out their lives without seeking
institutional care. But one study
shows that one in five Canadians
will probably need the level of
care an institution provides.

Like her fellow-resident
MacKay-Smith, Muriel Green,
also in her 90s, came of her own
accord to the lodge from her
apartment. ‘‘I had a slight stroke
and when | felt that the time had
come for me not to be alone in an
apartment, my doctor said this is
the best place and so I came here.
I was perfectly willing because I
knew some people here and 1
thought it would be a good idea
to have somebody look after all
the medications.*’

Vancouver gerontologist Gloria
Levi, co-author of Dealing With
Memory Changes as You Grow
Older, argues that the critical issue
for the elderly is empowerment —
the right to make one’s own deci-
sions. ‘‘There is always a danger
that younger people will equate
the senior’s physical incompetency
with mental incompetency. It is
important for the younger person

to learn how to attend ta those
physical needs without jeopardiz-
ing the dignity and self-esteem of

the older person in their fami-
lies."°
Like Eva and Muriel, Nellie

Siegworth, age 86, decided on her
own to live at the lodge. She says
“itis not difficult to adjust ... it
is a pleasant place with pleasant
people.’” But she recalls her own
parents in No:way grew oid at
home, supported by a large ex-
tended family who lived nearby.
“My parents kept on as they had
always done looking after the
house and the yard and the
animals ... there were so many of
us, it was no problem to look
after them in their old age ... we
all did our share of the work.’”

The increased financial security
of today's elderlv in Canada, as
well as the desire to live in-
dependently, results in the majori-
ty of seniors living in private
households. By their mid-70s,
many seniors tire of maintaining
their own homes, and the move
begins to smaller housing units.
Rental apartments, con-
dominiums, co-operative and
retirement communities are some
of the options chosen by seniors.

Homemuker services and volun-
feer programs like Mceals-On-
Wheels make it possible for many
seniors to remain in their own
homes when a higher degree of
care is required. Others choose to
move in with a relative or go to
an institution.

Clarissa Green, associate pro-
fessor of nursing at UBC, cau-
tions, however, that services for
the elderly and their caregivers,
such as respite and adult daycare,
are in short supply, especially in
tural areas. ‘‘Seniors need to look
at how much they can do on their
own, and how much they can ask
of family members. It’s a very
delicate balance, and one that is
unique from family to family.’’

MacKay-Smith recalls the point
when she reached an agreement
with her children that it was time

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for her to give up her apartment.
“to owas having trouble with my
eyes and that’s what worried my
family. 1 couldn’: see things and !
couldn’t read. 1 had a little
flashlight to turn on the buttons
on the stove.””

For the adult children of
seniors, it may be the first recog-
nition of ‘filial maturity’? — a
process in which the adult child
shifts towards seeing his or her
parents as a fellow adult, who
needs comfort and support from
family members. Issues such as
the safety of the parents living on
their own, and the adult children’s
own limited abilities to provide
adequate home help for their
parents, now rise to the fore.

Levi acknowledges that the
needs of adult children must be
balanced with those of their
parents, But she contends thai the
oldest persons in our society, like
other age groups, “thave the right
to take risks, make decisions, to

For the 70th Annuei
Ambieside
Par 3 Tournament

be an integral part of the planning
process and io have the final say.
They also have the right to make
mistakes. They even have the right
to choose things that are wrong
for them."'

Once a decision has been reach-
ed that a senicr needs a greater
degree of care than families and
others in the community can pro-
vide, family members play a key
role in a successful relocation.
Green thinks it was important her
daughter see the facility with her
and make choices about beiong-
ings and her room. As a result,
Green says, “I have all my things
here ... my walls are just covered
with my pictures.’? Equally im-
portant to Green are her
children’s frequent visits.

Levi characterizes the relation-
ship between senior parent and
adult child as one of the
reciprocal ties, where both genera-
tions have much to learn from
each other. If family members

The 1991 edition of the popular local tournament is set for

Saturday, July 13. Sponsored by the North Shore Newsand Park

Royal Shopping Centre, this tournament is open to ali golfers,
regardless of club affiliation or membership.

Again this year, there are four divisions: Men, women, seniors
and youth (16 years and under), each with plenty of prizes.

Qualifying Rounds

May be played on any day through Saturday, June 30. Place
your score cards in the tournament box in the clubhouse.

Entry fee ... $5.00 (inciudes souvenir hat)

Green fee ticket $5.75 (Seniors and youth --
under 18, $3.25 — weekends $5.75)

Finals

Saturday, July 13 weather permitting.

For information

Call Trygg Wynn, Tournament Director, at 921-7353

oa,
ee ey

“provide an environment in which
the ulder person can express their
deepest emotions openly and
frankly without being judged,’’
she says, ‘‘a consensus may be
more easily reached.”*

After the mave to a care facili-
ty, Some seniors maintain a strong
continuity with their past life.
Green, a rctired drama teacher, is
stil offering her creative gifts to
her new community at the lodge.
She is looking forward to her next
dramatic preduction, The
Shooting of Dan McGrew. She
says she feels ‘‘rather wonderful
just to have survived. P've had a
good life, healthy, successful,
hundreds of friends, and I feei
very fortunate. My children are
wonderful, but they have their
own interests anu we want our
own independence.’’

— By Margerer Davidson and
Maria LeRose (B.C. Council for
the Family}

win!

Gift Certificates, redeemable at
stores in Park Royal, for the top
three finishers in each of the four
divisions.

You can

Trophies for the winners in each
of the four divisions, men, women,
seniors and youth, and for the
| winner overall.

SE: 4: See : A
Total Solar Eclipse July 11, 1991
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SUDDENLY everyone is looking at Los Cabos for

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The Ambleside Par 3 Tournament

PARK ROYAL
Sponsored by the North Shore News and Park Royal Shopping Centre

Sanctioned by the West Vancouver Parks and Recreation
Advisory Committee

SUNDAY © WEDWESOAY - FRIDAY

Connie Kuerbis

Laguna Vista Real Estate
San Jose del Cabo Mexico
(604) 250-7449 (24 hrs.)