4 - Sunday, October 20, 1991 - North Shore News Facing the truth at 50: PEOPLE WHO are in communicaticn only with themselves are lost souls. We need other people to keep us human. We need to be checked in our megalomania and self-pity by the input of our friends. I had this brought home to me over the last couple of weeks as old buddies and family phoned, fired off cards and presents or, as a bunch of them did, gathered secretly for a surprise party to cheer me through the trauma of turning 56 years old. I’m not sure this is 4 particular- ly sexy topic, but, yes, the gauge just came up on my first half- century of life as the human being I think of as me. J was prepared to be stoic. [ vowed not to cry. The First Law of Ecology: Thou Shalt Not Whimper. I made jokes about it. “The first 50 years is the tough part, right?’’ ‘‘They say as you get older you lose your mind, what they don’t tell you is you won't miss it.” “It’s true isn’t it that the older a guy gets the hotter young women are for him, eh?’’ “No, seriously, that’s what ell the old guys tell me.’* The first serious inkling I had that there was some sort of sur- prise in the offing was when The Bob Hunter STRICTLY PERSONAL Beloved One got up at 7 a.m. on Sunday and started cleaning the house. Among the presents that arriv- ed, along with tine friends, was a framed copy of a 1972 newspaper ad, full-page, black and white, a close-up of me frowning at the camera, four distinct wrinkles in my forehead. It was a heavy-duty ‘‘furrowed brow’’ routine if there ever was one. The caption said: ‘‘Bob Hunter writes as if our lives depended on it.’’ And then some blurb about pollution. As an experiment, after un- wrapping the gift, I tried squeez- ing four distinct wrinkles out of my forehead ... and couldn't! It was all I could do to conjure two reasonably solid simultaneous frowns. Four were out of the question. What had happened? Was my flesh less elastic? Could I be less worried? Did I know something then that I don’t know now? Or is it that I know something now I couldn’t possibly know then? There is another, even more in- teresting possibility: Could it be that one doesn’t necessarily get more serious as one gets older? This may sound incredibly stupid, but sounewhere in my ex- pectations I assumed that when you ‘‘grew up,” the joy went out of life, and you had to turn grim-faced with importance. “Grown-ups” were alvays so gawd-awfully serious. I have since come te learn that grown-ups aren't that bad, really, it’s just that when they are around kids, they mostly seem to get North Vancouver going ahead with Klahanie Park cul de sac PARENTS ON Glen Aire Drive on the boundary between North Vancouver District and West Vancouver District are breathing a little easier now. Uncertain of West Vancouver's ability to have the Klahanie Park housing project access road com- pleted as scheduled by next May, North Vancouver District Council decided Oct. 7 to remove park traffic from nearby residential streets by building a cul de sac. Parents living near the housing project, which is adjacent to Earl's restaurant on Marine Drive, have been worried about increased traffic from the project and in- creased dangers to their children. But the decision to go ahead with an early cul de sac construc- tion date sets up a possible con- frontation between the two com- munities. NORTH VANCOUVER DISTRICT COUNCIL West Vancouver had requested that North Vancouver District wait until May, when occupancy permits would be issued at the housing project, before starting cul de sac construction. Also, West Vancouver will not have the available funds until the 1992 fiscal year. North Vancouver District Ald. Ernfie Crist said there should be no doubt that the municipality was pressuring West Vancouver into paying for construction of the cul de sac. ‘*Let West Vancouver know of our intention of a reciprocal act of good neighborliness,”” he said, _ feferring to a wooden bridge West NE PAYETTE, M. REGIST ERED CLINICAL COUNSELLOR Do you struggle with: O QUITTING SMOKING O WEIGHT CONTROL O FEELING DEPRESSED O RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS The use of hypnosis & counselling can help you overcome your difficulties and reach your goals. As experienced counsellors, we are with you every step of the way. Rutley Payette Effective Short Term Counselling Clinical Hypnotherapy | TODAY! 986-9304 + FREE CONSULTATION ¢ Vancouver built but that North Vancouver was forced to pay for. District Deputy Director of Engineering Services Harry McBride said that a December completion date was not unrea- sonable. He also noted that the cul de sac was ‘“‘not an exceptionally ex- pensive road’’ to build. Construction would take place by avoiding damaging or remov- ing any trees, he said. them. This philesophy is personified by Jeremy Leevers. taken over by an urge to dominate and control. Of course someone has to do it and it might as well be the adults, since the kids are going to screw up for sure. Putting off major life-decisions until the day when you finally “‘grow up”’ is a brilliant strategy. Or at least that’s how it seemed to me until it came down to the wire and I was staring my own demi- centennial in the belly button. By 50, if you haven’t grown up, the possibility begins to exist that growing up may not indeed be part of your destiny. 1 personally know severai guys who are as old as me or even (gasp!) older, who show absolute- ly no sign of having grown up. In a couple of cases, I might be tempted to make the case that the footprints have been going the other way. Why should history be a linear arc from point ‘‘A"’ to point boyhood is forever | ““*B,”’ anyway? Nothing else in life is neat or logical. This can be taken the wrong way, but I think I am speaking truly here when f suggest that boys do not grow up. They become older, for sure. But they are just older boys. The concept of males growing up is an invention of our mothers, who, seeing that their husbands were never going to grow up, tried to con their sons into doing it. Never. Forget it. It’s not part of the job description. A grown-up male? Contradiction in terms, if I ever saw one. In any eveni, 1 have no inten- tion of setting a precedent. You get to « certain age, you gotta set an example. I wouldn’t want the wrong signal going out. It’s my mission. I’ve got to warn other guys. It’s a bonding thing. Grow- ing up is a fascist plot! Boyhood is forever. ARDAGH HUNTER TURNER Barristers & Solicitors Personal Injury AFTER HOURS ! FREE INITIAL COFSULTATION y Creing! Maries ony| 986-4366 | 986-9706 4300-1401 LONSDALE, NORTH VANCOUVER, BC. ¢ TOP BRANCH SALESPERSON FOR SEPTEMBER 1991 FOR SALES RESULTS CALL PHILIP PEPIN 985-9544 124 hes) 122] Lonsdale Ava, North Vancouver “To be successfui in Real Estate, you have to meet the needs of your clients” To do this you must recognize these needs, and work diligently to meet In his i4 years in the Real Estate profession, Jeremy has assisted hun- dreds of clients in choosing the perfect home for them. As one of the most successful Real Estate Agents at Sussex Realty in North Vancouver, Jeremy’s caliber of experience and training makes him your best choice in selling and buying Real Estate. NOW is the time for his advice! Our Real Estate market is very active. Make sure that your decision is the right one when choosing a REAL ESTATE PROFESSIONAL. Contact: JERE LEEVERS “A mame you can count on” Sussex Group - S.R.C. Realty Corp. 2996 Lansdale Ave., North Vancouver 984-9711 (24 hrs.)