4 - Sunday, July 17 1988 - North Shore News 1 “KNEW” Georgian Bay about as well as any place in Canada, I thought, even though I had never been there. It is, after all, the title of one of Tom Thomson’s finest paintings, showing a wind-hunched Jack pine on the edge of a churned-up lake, with storm clouds rolling pon- derously, everything in splendid primal tumult. it is maybe the quintessential ““Canadian”’ artwork. If there is, in fact, a Canadian consciousness, it would peer out at the land through Tom Thomson’s eyes. bly hypocritical aura of patriotism, as though | was somehow checking out my Canadian identity instead of just getting away and laying back. I mean, Georgian Bay! Hey! Thus.... We came to be on 2 Tarmac-vast freeway heading west at 7 a.m., zooming along one of 18 lanes through canyons of stone and under Saturnian rings of grey ce- ment, amid the mighty rigs and Greyhounds, a tiny made-in-Japan capsule of plastic sheltering four L, crosses my mind how crazy this is, bringing my precious children and Angel- Essence Herself out into the midst of this bowling alley of mass-produced megadoom, a stampede of steel and rubber behemoths, with us spurting along like a mechanical rabbit in a shooting gallery.’’ I think he did more to create a Canadian national psyche — again, assuming there is a valid one — than any other artist. He has a lot to do with what subliminal feelings of Cana- dianness I manage to experience. So when an invitation came to stay with « friend at his parents’ cottage on legendary Georgian Bay itself, I seized the offer hungrily. Having survived four months in Toronto, the Swiss Family Hunter, as we call ourselves, were starved for a bit of nature, to say nothing of Cap’n Bob panting for a glimp- se of open water. Four months was the longest stretch I’d gone in decades, by the way, without touching my salty feet upon a salty deck. When my host added that we would have to travel by boat to an island to get to his folks’ cabin, my soggy soul was set a-gigging. Water, water./. The fact that it was the Canada Day long weekend added a proba- highly-fragile sentient beings, Cap’n Bob grimly at the whecl. It crosses my mind how crazy this is, bringing my precious children and Angel-Essence Herself out into the midst of this bowling alley of mass-produced megadoom, a stampede of steel and rubber behemoths, with us spurting along like a mechanical rabbit in a shooting gallery. In the midst of this hurtling, nerve-wracking madness, Sweetness-Pie, a chronic back-seat driver, can’t resist the urge to yell that | am missing the turnoff for the 400 and that I'd better change lanes i.amediately. Can you imagine? This confuses me, because I think for a moment she's right, and I change lanes madly, and the next thing I know we are off the freeway and on to a ramp leading us down to a parking lot around a shopping mall, lost in darkest East York. Needless to say, Eternal Love- Juice 2nd I scream at each other like animals. I'm very jumpy about being given a bum steer off the freeway by a woman who can’t keep her bloody yap shut, etc. The children cringe in horror, the four-year-old admonishing us that we’ll have to go to our rooms, and the nine-year-old wishing we would act like, cults. ft sereech 19 a stuy, bang the door oper, and climb out, shriek- ing at her: “You drive! I quit!”’ What a classic start to a con- temporary Canuck pilgrimage to Tom Thomson land! The rest of the voyage is driven in a seething miasma of silence, even though Soul-Flower finally apologizes. This is not quite enough to quench the rightcous wrath of the aggrieved driver until hours later. We rendezvous with our host at the McDonald’s next to the Petro-Can station just outside of Barrie. Georgian Bay? Tom who? lam starting to get worried. This national roots journey is go- ing awry. Family travel is a risky thing where mood is concerned. To get this stretched-out so early .... A very bad sign. [ride from the McDonaid’s on- ward with my host, his kid and their dog, leaving the Ever-Beloved One to drive along behind with our kids, everybody happy to see old Dorkbrain gone. Soon we are off the highway and on to a narrow winding road through broadleaf forest. I can identify Birch, Maple, maybe Elm —— that’s about all. We pass through an Indian reserve and pull up in an ap- propriately rustic dockside town where probably a hundred cars are parked. Here we are. The shore of actual Georgian Bay, a tremendous inlet on the edge of a natural res- ervoir containing one-fifth of the world’s fresh water supply. As we transfer our gear from the cars to the dockside, waiting for our boat to arrive, 1 notice the water of Georgian Bay is clear. Very, very clear. Ominously clear. So clear, in fact, that | know right away that something is ter- ribly wrong. 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