W. Van ce cell

I witmessed the most
wonderful thing the
other day, something
that gave me a little
faith in the old concept
of the “great equaliz-
er.”

It happened carly Sunday
morning as T was walking my
dogs in the doggie park at
Ambleside.

The morning sun was just
beginning to warm the grassy
ticlds and it was completely
Quiet at the park except for
the twittering bird:

As I was walking along
one of the paths reveling in
the solitude T spotted ove
slick-looking dudes coming in
my direction. They appeared
to be in their carly 30s and
had that master-of-zhe-uni-
verse aura about them.

I saw that one of the guys
was yakking away on 2 teeny
tiny cell phone, and immedi-
ately the hairs on the back of
my neck bristled. (Why do

Close to
home

so loudly? [s the reception
that bad?)

The guv on the phone was
waving his one free jewel-
bedecked hand around, ges-
turing flamboyandy during
his half of the chat.

I should tell you at this
point that there is almost
nothing that infuriates me
more than ure inconsiderate
cellular phone user.

I know, I know, cellular
phones are wonderful things.
They enhance human interac-
tion and can even save lives.
I'd be an idiot not to agree
that there is a place for them
in our world. But I believe
that a code of conduct should

and printed in a contract
fori for all cell phone cus-
tomers to sign so that they
aren't so obnoxious to be
around.

Here are just a few of the
things rude cell phone users
a cali them “big phoneys”)
do that T consider to be out-
rageously obnoxio

y leave their phones
on during intimare dinners in
public restaurants — TF once
saw a big phoncy spend
about 10 minutes on a very
animated phone call w his
date just sat there, ignored
and embarrassed. Like most
big phoneys, he s every
loudly, forcing the rest of the
diners to listen to his one-
sided dialogue. Must have
been a really important guy.

Anyone who leaves h
phone on during a movie in
public theatre dese
gooey bucket of but
corn dumped on his head for
being a jackass. That goes
double tor the arrogant the-
atre-goer who leaves his cel!

celi phone users alway:

maBailioox

k be established immediately

phone on during any kind of

RARE ITEP ENT en EE RT PERRO Ig RIAN HERERO ma mn ce aN

Hey Canada, say yo to Joe

Dear Editor:

Any good business owner will tell you:
when you're hiring somcone, choose the best
person for the job. Untortunately, thar’s not
always true in politics. Hit we , Progress ive
Conservative Party members wouldn't think
twice — they’d elect Joe Clark as their new
leader.

There are few politicians in this country
who can claim to be Joc Clark’s equal. Few
have served their country as well as he has,
both in government and in opposition. And
virtually no politician in Canada is as honest as
Joc Clark.

These are strange political times. Canadians
are faced with a separatist government in
Quebce City and only one truly national party,
che Liberals. Neither Reform nor the NDP can
hopc to become a national political alrernative.
But Joe Clark is a truly national politician: he
comes from western Canada, but is highly
respected from coast to coast. ‘Un Quebec, he
is ‘even more respected than Jean Chretien.)

In a recent speech, Joe Clark said that he
and his family “creat seriously the argumer.t
that circumstances aren’t normal, in the parry,
or in the country, and 1 that I may be in a
unique position to make a difference.”

Bur he also said that he “would have to be-

Dear Editor:

Re: Lions
repair.

North Shore residents
should. remember the
headaches, heart attacks, high
blood pressures and
caused when
Narrows was being repaired,
and should wake up the
MULAs and the niunicipalitic
to bring the strongest po:
ble pressure on the govern-
ment to find a different solu-
tion to just: repairing the
bridge.

just imagine the dreadful
problems it “Will cause to the
commuters; as it is, just a
minor accident on the bridge
brings all traffic to a standstill,

So wake up before it is too
late.

Kabir Ebrahim
North Vancouver

Gate Bridge

convinced that the difference would be signiti-
cant.” We have set out to do just that — to
show Joe Clark how big a dif nce he can
make.

Thus far, over 335 Canadians have added

i to ours, asking Joe to return to

ics and become a candidate for his

party's ieaders ip. Some are Tory party mem-
bers, but many are not.

They, like us, believe that Joc Clark is an
exceptional Canadian who can still make an
important contribution.

If you want to help us convince Mr. Clark
to run, send your message of support tor Joe
to: Draft Joe Clark, P.O. Box #482, 201 Sr.
Antoine, Montreal, Quebee H2Y 3K8.

You can also call and leave a message of sup-
port at (514) 982-9230 or fax us at (416) 352-
5310. If vou have Internet access, you can e-
mail us at drattjac@yahoo.com

Joe Clark brought dignity to che nation and
integrity to public lite. Let’s bring him back.
Zack Taylor
Spokesman
The Committee to Draft Joe Clark as
Progressive Conservative Leader
(514) 982 9230
draftjoe@yahoo.com
http://www.blackeye.com/craftjoc

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i} simply cannot abide
the big phoneys who walk
down the street talking on
their cell phones, even
though on the street vou at
least have the option to get
away from the guy’s one-
sided conversation by run-
ning away i

Anyone foolish enough to

bring a cell phone onto a golt’

course deserves to have his
phone tossed inte the closest
water hazard. Most courses
ban cell phones, but unbe-
evably you still occasionally
see a big phoncy even in
those sacred places.

Clearly the most danger-
ous cel! phone user is the guy
or gal driving a car while on
the | phone. Recent studies by
the University of Toronto
show that drivers are four to
five times more likely to get
into a car accident when they

talking on a cellular
phone.

“But my phone is hands-
free” a friend exempted her-
self when we were talking
about this the other da

Sorry, no exemption.

Studies show that the like-
Bhood of an automobile acci-
dent is the same whether vou
are holding your cell phone
in your hand while you drive
or are speaking on a “hands-
free” set. If you've ever dri-
ven while talking of the
phone you know what Cm
talking about.

The reason for this is sim-
ple. Driving a car requires a

eat deal of concentration.
here are so many things vou

~~ %T; STX

Pedals
_reg:$1.500

Friday. May 29,

phoney messes with fi

have to watch tor, li
radar and hidden po
Your attention to driving, is
distracted when veu are talk-
ing on acell phane, it’s as
simple as that.

(A couple of states aud
Quebec have actually institut-
ed laws thar forbid celi phone
users from talking on the
phone while they are driving.
Unforrunately, they've missed

because drivers are
ed to have hands-
tions, )

Anyway, back to the other
morning and my walk, Ltke I
said, this one guy was yap-
ping his fool head off on his
cell phone as I approached
him, utterly destroving the
peace of the place.

photo

1998 — North Shore News — 7

He seemed to be torally
with his call, so
pied in face that he
stepped smack into a big pile
of fresh dog poop (not from
one of my dogs of course). T
couldn't help nivself, f burst
out laughing.

“Oh, sh*t,” he shouted,
litting his foot with the stylish
loafer on it and shaking it
wildi

d to restrain myself as
I passed him, but I couldn’t
keep my mouth shut. “Darn
those irresponsible dog own-
ers who don’t clean up after
their dogs,” I said, winking at
his friend as | whistled by.

Sce, there is a great equal-
izer, and happily he forgot his
doggie bag Jast Sunday.

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