RECE NTLY, YOUR man
Doug looked in on a play
performed i in the National
Theatre of the Absurd,
_ The occasion was a Canadian
© human rights tribunal in which
young Tany McAleer seas up
before three inguisitors for saying
dhe wrong thing on his phone,
He had put autitrecarded mes-
siige that ridiculed homos and fan-
sized about stuffing them inty
bogs. ‘
co Me claimed the last bit was a
Joke, But in today's thin- “lipped
Canada, joking is out af styte.
“Prudictably, the tribunal found
against him
itmecin solemn conchive tor
three whole days, during which
her its much subbing about
whether “queer” wis a proper terin
for MeAlver td have used or
chomosextal™ would have

edera! deficit, meanwhile,
licking merrily along, helped

by the thousand spent on this mys:

Gry,’

: McAleer hae-no time for the
hird sex, members of which were
natiendanee, whining away like

ud,.They included Beity Baxter,
he hte ran for the Nop.

cat disgust ,.:
! Man-Boy Lo
which
x, with con-

ON THE OTHER HAND

pecaptiles.”

He mentioned the homo prac.
tices of “fisting” and “rimming,”
the details of which are best left
undescribed ina family newspaper.
und continued:

“Hell, the ancient Celts used ta
fake their queers and trample them
into the peat bogs, It's nat such a

. bad idea, maybe, Perhaps we have
finally stumbled across the argue
ment that will save Burns bog i in
Delta fram development because it
is the only bog big cnough to ser-
vice the needs of the progressive
City of Vancouver.”

As mentioned, the Joke Police
didn'Usmile, Nor are these modern
‘inquisitions in the business of pro-

: tecting free speech. Just the oppo-
site. So it availed McAleer nothing |
to claim his statement was made
tongue in cheek. Tongues in checks
are also frowned on.

Dr. Suzuki

Sidekick (a)

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oke police not funny

Doug
Collins

Laughing will soon be out of
fashion, oo, Depend upon it.

The accused was represented by
lawyer Dong Christie. who took the
sase for no lee, his client having no
money,

On the other side there were two
well-paid lawyers, one of wham
had bair down his back while the
other was “a person of color.”

Employment equity in action, no
doubt.

Chiristie’s arguments were first
class but human righls people have
their own agenda, So it ook them

only ao hour to consider and deliver

their verdict,

Christie had said if was ridicu-
lous that adults should be siting
there discussing whether the word
“queer” or the word "pedaphife”
should have been used. [sit there
something cabled “the Queer
Nation’? he asked.

A linguistics professor was
culled on deliver his opinion, and
he agreed. naturally, that “queer” is
a naughty word,

le rentinded me of when Hunky
Bill the fast food man was up
before a rights hearing for naming
his restaurants after himself
Protessors feli over themselves to
testify that “hunky” wis our ol
hounds.

Christic hammered aiway? should

- people be silent if they don't like

homosexuality? Was it offensive to
calla child molester a queer? Are

people not to be allowed to diserim-

inate against incest, ripe, and sado-
masochism? Should McAleer have
to look over his shoulder if he is
telling a bad joke? Should he sub-
mit his Jokes to a human rights tr-
bunal for approval?

The tawyer niust have known he
was wasting his time. We bave a
Chanrier of Rights and Freedoms but
it is full of holes. Inthe U.S... where

they have the First Amendment,

complaints like this wouldn't even

_ get started.

Being a bit of a wimp, J
wouldn't go so far as to suggest
that Human Rights Commissions

-should themselves be stulfed into
‘bogs, But they should certainly be
-abolished. The’ members of the tri-

bunals are all politically correct,

~ otherwise they woulda’ be there.
~ And they swear no oath of impar-

tiality. » ;
History tells us that the road to

: tyranny is paved with human rights,
‘. Heary WIE's Star Chamber began
yas a kind of human rights court, So”
“did the Spanish Inquisition. .

© Incidentally, the current budget

“for the Canadian Human Rights
Commission is $17,582,000. What
_ a waste of money.

~The Joke Police are a bad joke.

Ne

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