52 - Wednesday, March 3, 1993 — North Shore News aper plate: MISS MANNERS BEAR MISS MANNERS — As a resident of a large condo building, 1! have often wondered about the correctness of sticking notes and/or cards in doorjambs. Some notes I can understand -—— ‘Alice, call me when you return’’ — although I feel they should be ‘in an envelope, not just hanging out for all to read. But what about. cards, and thank-you notes, and invitations? Does propriety dictate that they be mailed? We have a woman living here who will write on anything and tape it to a door. | once came home to find a paper plaie taped to my door, and another time, a shoe-box lid. GENTLE READER — Proprie- ty does not get a cut from the . post office; a hand-delivered letter may be every bit as formal as one that is mailed, As a matter of fact, sending TRADE SHOW, SEMINARS AND DAY. 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And while it has becomé com- monplace for college students to hang message boards on their dormitory-room doors, for the convenience of peopic making ap- pointments. or delivering wit- licisms, open communication is not quite proper in a grown-up apartment building. It may also be dangerous, as it alerts strangers to the fact that the occupant is not at home: How much extra effort docs it take merely to slip a note under the door, rather than to tape it up? DEAR MISS MANNERS When I was divorced 20 years ago, my father-in-law decided (o divorce me, too. My mother-in- law was more understanding, but she took her cues from him. .. The termination hurl, because I thought we were all close friends much for the two of us, for. which I was clways grateful, They are now 90 and %4 years old. When one of them dies, sbould { make an appearance at the funeral, or send flowers or a note to their daughter, my ex- wife? At a time of such personal grief, would this gesture show that EF bear no il) will, or stould I let it 3 Sensotional Days of BPAY 2. SUPA. MIKE VANCE sei Disney idao-man and one of the 5 most requested speakers f in America toies ! you through } PADVENTUR ES IN Sponsored by: | Ai y Vancouver } THINKING. ! peseors 24 Hod & Council ae aad Area Radio } . @onua tesco pass and quietly bear the Joss myself? Since funerals are for the living mostly, 1 wouldn't want to in-’ trude, no maiter how honest my own feelings might be. GENTLE READER -- Another day, Miss Manners will debate with you the idea that funerals are mostly for the living; they are also to show respect for the dead. But in this case, you are aware that your former parents-in-law did not wish to continue treating you as a member of the family after your divorce. As she senses the pain implicit in your letter, even though 20 years have gone by, Miss Manners cannot help but think that you are unduly anticipating the death of those who are still alive, because you are still searching for a way of linking yourself with their daughter. . When the time comes for you to express your appreciation of these people to those who survive them, direct it to your own children. _ They will be grateful by receiving ‘and I loved them both. They did j \ ! i consolation from their father, and by a tribute to their grandparents. DEAR MISS MANNERS — Belieye it or not, I have no desire for a big traditionel wedding. My dream is to clope while on vaca- tion, getting married on a tropical beach. No hasstes, no outlandish cests, no pomp and circumstance. How do | handle family and friends who would expect the traditional wedding? Mom, my best friend, would be Zevastated (1 think). I’m the only daughter. GENTLE READER Miss Manners has no desire to: talk people into big weddings, pomp and circumstance usually being more threatening than encourag- ing to proper wedding behavior. But pray, what do you call a EYNOTE SPEAKERS! [oar TRADE SHOW SPONSORED &Y- MW PUBLISHING Bi Se aL SALLY ABBOTT * So well received last year we asked her back ty speak on wtting your best loot forward with "THE MOST DIFFICULT SALE OF YOUR UFE,. SELUNG YOU TO YOU!" In co-operation with: "ADPIeSs THAT COVER THE BASES FROM RETAIL, BUSINESS TO BUSINESS & SELLING PERSPECTIVES * Ad Sense To Save.Ad Dollars*Experis' Secrets of Media Releases Relationship Selling Marketing With MultiMedia Technology*Co-op Advertising * Maximizing Your Ditect Marketing ProgrameSelling A Sponsorships Stretching Your Video Budgel*in-store Markeling* The Rasio Advantage* Advertising Design & Layout*Understanding Your Media Rep*Keaping Your Customers Happy* Marketing Demystified*tocal Success Stories*And, much, much more! Only $439.00 a¢ day until March 42 se 1735 - Fhone. 604-685-3840 Fos: ARCH 23024025, VANCOUVER TRADE & CONVENTION CENTRE Produced by: Haakon Holdings Ltd., 1020 Mcintand Street, Vancouver, B.C. VOB 274 404-688-0270 ten ain Eat Te Ee Mee a Pe AA eprom e a, essage a vacation wedding is not enough if it would cause genuine distress to your mother. hassle if it is not causing devasta- tion for your mother (and thus, as you gracefully say, also for your best friend)? A wedding is a family event, contrary to the vulgar belief that it is the couple's “day,” and that consideration for the feelings of others may therefore be suspend- ed. That you may be satisfied with But that is not to say others cannot be talked around. If your mother would be satisfied with a big wedding reception upon your return from elopement, Miss Manners certainly has no abjec- Seed Boe ras te THE CORPORATION OF THE - DISTRICT OF WEST VANCOUVER FLUSHING OF WATER MAINS NOTICE The Municipai Water Department will commenice its annual program of flushing of water mains on March 01/93 through to May 14/93. This may result in the water supply showing sediment. The sediment is bacterially harmless, but the water will show some discolouration that may affect some commercial undertakings. B. Lambert, PEng. Director of Operations WHOLESALE WEDDING GOWNS By Jessica Bridal import NG GOWN priced from Regular Retail Prices $399 to $2400 Head Piece and Veil priced from $24.99 te $74.99 Regular retail prices $49 to $150 “SIZES 4 - 26 SALE 3 DAYS ONLY! Mar. 5, 6,7 Mar. 5,6- 10am to 8 pm Mar. 7-10 am to5 pm Chateau Granville Hotel 1100 Granviile Street 669-7070