Page 3 32, 2, February 4, 1979 - Sunday News ‘Freelance Counsellor Hayden Stewart may be reached at 261-6242 for appointments for individual, counselling. His new office in the Plaza _ international Hotel [open Tuesdays only] is tor tra convenience of North Shore residents. family or group The midnight movie QUESTION: I have three teen-agers and they’ve told me about a show they want ta_ go to because ‘everybody goes to it’’. They say it is on every week at a Vancouver theatre and starts at mid- night. They tell me that all kinds of kids have gone to it three or four times. Do you know about it? -, ANSWER: Perhaps the kids ‘thought they'd put you off if ithey told you that the name of the show is Rocky Horror Keep it QUESTION: I hope those girls who ‘“‘think’’ their boss is a homosexual have sense enough to keep their thoughts to themselves. Yahoos and snide remarks can make life miserable for some people. Don’t you agree? STEWART: I agree that q -mountain.. nglish, please! QUESTION: Why don’t the young people of today speak English? If they want a smoke, why do they talk about a nic fit? Everything they say has to be translated. STEWART: I remember my _dad saying the same thing to me about a hundred years | ago. | think I had told him that a certain girl was ‘‘fast’’ and he asked, *‘Translation, please?’’ It was always so. The other day, I got a - laugh out of this copyright bit of fun. It was headed, ‘““Remember?’”’ ‘and asked things like, Do you remember when grass was something you mowed?....when a joint was something in your body which helped you bend.... when hash was a meal.... when high was the top of a .when gay was jolly....when a trip meant Picture Show. I’m told by my spies (14 years old) that it. is really quite ‘‘rocky’’, that it has no horror to it at all. It’s a fun, musical, far-out thing. The managers of. the . show let the kids bring rice to throw, but they are asked not to bring confetti. One of my spies had been for the first time when he talked with me -about it and believe me, he'll go again. He thought it to yourself yahoos and snide remarks can make life miserable ‘‘for some peopie’’. Indeed, most people find them quite dis- concerting. And yet, others are able to handle them more usefully. Perhaps they are committed to developing their own reality and will not allow others to dictate to “mean in _ He was correct. Or should | but © going from one town “to another....etc., etc,, etc. Why not’ relax and enjoy this’ weird phenomenon? (There, | just did it myself! ‘“Weird’’ doesn't really mean what I wanted it to that sentence. Weird, eh?) Judy Watts, who wrote the piece that 1 referred to above, could well add, ‘‘Do you when weird meant weird?’’ | am told that a famous French grammiarian, when critically - ill, was heard by his loved ones to say, faintly, *‘] am going to, or I am about to, die. Either is correct’’ ’ I assume he died happy. have said, he died ““happily’’? Slanguage is sloppy and lazy, but so is a goofy friend of mine and | enjoy him immensely. Will you give me two Brownie Points for that? Or will you say, ‘*Translation please’’? marvelious. The other kid had been there four times - and their friend they went with was in attendance for the tenth time!! I gather it is an audience-participation thing in that the kids holler things atthe-right time, etc. By the way, one of the kids I'm talking about invitéd his mother to go with him next time and said his friend’s father was going to go. They invited me! Why not go along. mom? them, even by yahoos and snide remarks. hk isa gracious thing however, to avoid added a burden to another human being and I think you are wise in suggesting that the girls **keep their thoughts to themselves" A private fantasy QUESTION: I am in my mid-thirties and quite uan- happy about my marriage. I’ve worked hard at it, but, frankly, I can’t get very enthusiastic about my hus- band. I have never had an affair and don’t want to do that, but belleve me, | often think about ft. Now there fs a complication that Is, at ono and the same (time, very exciting and very fright- ening. I have become very attrac- ted to another man, sexually. I would love to have an affair with him and yet, as | told you, I never have had one and really I don’t want to. | can Imagine all the com- plications If my husband and daughters ever found out, or suspected. I can’t get this man out of my mind and I’m doing all sorts of fantacizing about being with him. Now my question. You see, I have never been alone with this fellow and so, of course, he doesn’t know how I feel, although he may have guessed because I think he is also very Interested In me. So what I want to know fs, don’t you think I ought to tell him how attracted I am to him? It seems to me it would be a lot easier for me Uf he knew how I feel. STEWART: | fail to sce how it would be ‘‘easier’’ for you. It is not uncommon to “*want’’ someone and at the same time have other wants that supercede that onc. I'm remembcring you said, you have not been unfaithful to your husband and don’t want to start now. In that case, be grateful for your fantasies and keep your mouth closed! If the man in question knew how you feel, is conceivable that he might puta Jot of pressure on you. That would not make it -casier for you, but much harder. ; Moreover, if you told him your feelings, it is not unthinkable that he might tell you to behave yourself and get lost. Would make it easier for you? that If you let them, perhaps these strong feelings you have, might indicate to you that you have a lot more to offer within your marriage than you have so far given, You may be standing pretty close to some undiscovered dimensions to your marriage. Be more loving and more loveable at home and sec if it isn’t better for you and your husband and the girls, | think that would make it ‘‘casier’’ for you. remember , sf What's in it for the News? | QUESTION: I suppose you would not be allowed to tell us candidly what the North Shore News gets out of promoting your ‘‘Evenings with Hayden Stewart”’ at the Plaza Hotel. But, if you can’t tell us, why not? STEWART: I can tell you. They won’t mind. They.don’t get anything out of it. Not one solitary red-copper do they get. They may_ get something out of it, but no money, and I assume that it is that part of the operation you are curious about. They may get the good will of the community if the ings’’ have valid worth, and they may get. the ill-will of . the community if the feeling develops that the whole business is a rip-off. If you don't mind my quoting them, to think 1 ‘have something to **Even- . ay I can tell you. that they seem say’ and they ‘have offered me the opportunity to say it There’s no-catch. That’s. the whole e story. Sort of nice, ‘eh camara De modern SPA in Western Canada : Open 7 days a week Mon. to Fri. 10 am-10pm Sat. & Sun. from 10 am-6 pm NORTH SHORE INT. PLAZA HOTEL MARINE DR.