50 - Sunday, December 6, 1987 - North Shore News Lifestyles. Gifts inap| DEAR MISS MANNERS — I give my secretary a gift in appreciation for dedicated work over the year, but she misinterprets my intention and gives me gifts throughout the year. The last was a book with a per- sonal message written inside. I do not wish to take this book home, miss manners by Judith Martin nor do I want to leave it in the of- fice for my colleagues to see. Con- sequently it was, like all the other pifts, trashed in the nearest can on the street. Please do not think I am ungrateful. The trouble is that | show appreciation because I do not know how to tactfully tell her 1 want the practice to stop. J don't want to be rude, as she is a good secretary. Why can’t a boss be a kind, polite and nice person to his secre- tary, without her thinking he is a personal friend and should he showered with pifts? GENTLE READER — Any ex- change of presents in the office encourages that kind of thinking, Miss Manners believes. Why can’t you show your appreciation with an annual bonus, rather than ad- ding the personal touch of selec- ting a present (especially as Miss Manners suspects that you sent your nephew a check for his wed- ding because you claim you never know what your relatives want)? However, your secretary's behavior is certainly a large further step in the wrong direction. Even your close friends probably do not shower you with presents throughout the year; she has the decided air of courting you. Acceptance will not discourage this. You must retreat, albeit tardi- ly, into the kind, polite, nice but Ambitions raised sky-hirh From page 49 Bondar said Canada has been negotiating for a Canadian astronaut to fly with the space sta- tion. “We're also looking at the Rus- sian program,’’ she said. ‘“‘We were invited in late October to go over and talk about collaborative efforts and talk about joint ex- periments | as part of their satellite program.’ Bondar, originally from Sault Ste. Marie, Ontario, said she has been meeting with many en- thusiastic stud “ts during her lec- ture swing - hrough Lower Mainland schoois. Support Year |. Lung Aesociation “Dm hoping those not so inter- ested in science will come away with a new interest,’’ she said. oy pedestaled impersona! manner of proper of- fice behavior. An excellent way to start would be to give her that bonus for Christmas, along with the statement: ‘I really suppose this will be more useful. You know, I never did think that pres- ents were appropriate among working colleagues.” QEAR MISS MANNERS — My twin daughters were recently at- tendants at their cousin's wedding. Since we Jive at a great distance, my sister and her daughter, the bride, arranged (to have the dresses made with measurements sent by PANDA THE CHILORE CHILDREN" Ss SHOE STORE Sale! Dress Shoes and Boots Discounts to 50% CAPILANO MALL 986-4450 5 WITH LEAVES BIN LENGTH. Solid Oak Veneered Family sized Dining Table on hail & claw «hase closed 42°x607 with two 18% extension leaves, mail to her. 1 offered to pay for the dresses, but my sister refused and paid for them herself, However, the day before the wedding, when my daughters were trying on the dresses, my niece in- formed them that she was keeping their dresses as keepsakes. This was both 4 surprise and a disap- pointment for my daughters, as it had not been discussed before this. Was this proper etiquette? Should we have voiced disap- pointment? Retired? Want to Curl? * ropriate at the office GENTLE READER — Keep- sakes? Is she reserving them in case this marriage doesn’t work out? Does the bride want a supply of identical dresses? It is certainly odd, but Miss Manners sees no alternative to let- ting it go. Any discussion about who keeps the dresses is bound to deteriorate into ‘Well, 1 paid for them,"’ always an unseemly argu- ment when connected to a wed- ding. Come to a Senior Mixed Curling Organizational Meeting. Monday, December 7th 7:00 pm at the Lonsdale Recreation Centre 123 East 23rd St. Senior (50+) Mixed Daytime Curling at your Rec Centre Call 988-6166 for further information. - QUEEN ANNE 18TH CENTURY STYLED 9 PIECE CHERRYWOOD DINING ROOM SUITE CONSISTING OF OVAL DINING 42”x64” EXTENDS WITH LEAF TO 82” SIX ELEGANT DINERS, 4 SIDES AND 2 ARMS BUFFET/HUTCH WITH PEDIMENT TOP 58"x80” WITH MIRROR-BACK & LIGHTED INTERIOR 9 PIECE SUITE 10 DAY DELIVERY $9995 0 . FAMILY: SIZED IT’S YOUR CHOICE! § with your purchase of a dining room table, you & - can purchase cither the Oak Arrow Back Dining & Ch hair #1, or the Canadian replica of the & Oak Pressback Diner #2. FOR ONLY WIN A TRIP FOR TWO TO JOLLY OLD ENGLAND DURING AOYAL CITY ANTIQUES’ "GREAT TAKE-OFF” SALE. ENTER AT ANY ROYAL CITY ANTIQUES, RULES AND REGULATIONS AVAILABLE ON REQUEST. DINING TABLE SAVE $170.05, ar 895 Ft ee ts see Royal City Antiques and FINE FURNISHINGS LTD. $1,049.00 |. a 986-1 OPEN DAILY 9:30-6:00; SUNDAY 12:00-5:00 Free Gin Wrapping & Layaway to Christmas