QUESTION: In: the past
year I have made “huge
progress in. changing my

habits, — mostly.
reprogramming my . self-
image, In many. cases I have
used auto suggestion thpes..

_T seem_to have: a mental

ay. ie -of “my.
oldest habits until is years
ago I was an early - It
doesn't: matter what time I
go to bed; when the: saree
goes off my sub-conscious
makes me return to sleep. -
Are you aware -of any
hypnotic tapes. which “ad-
dress this_problem?. Do: you
have any. suggestions. which -
might ‘be helpful? I awake
easily. But I cat use four

&

——-QUESTION: My sister is
mad with-me, yet all I did
was tell her the truth. She
calls me a male chanvinist
pig, and yet I think the fault
is hers. She bought 2
swimsuit called “the diaper

‘look.” Ie is a narrow strip of

material that only covers the
centre of the body, leaving
the hips and most of tke
genital area bare. She wore
it to a pool party and ap-

parently got a lot of suiggers
and some crode remarks

Don’t wait for maturity

QUESTION: I am a 20 year
old man, at the present
moment I am not dating a
girl. I have a desire to go out
with someone but people
keep telling me that you
have to be a together person,
mature and responsible.

I wouldn't say that ] ama
totally together person, but
I'm getting professional help
and am involved im a
behavioral devclopment
program designed to change
one’s behavior in certain
aspects. | want a girlfriend
but feel as If 1 should get my
priorities in proper order.
Continuing with therapy, as I
am, for specific goals and
accomplishing them, | will
feel more confident about a
relationship. 1 am making a
real effort to get my Life tn
order and I can see positive
changes. Do you feel | am

Marla Sta

consultation.

through.

fford, qualified and
istered electrotogist lerveites

Galle for @ personal and private

alarm clocks ‘and ‘stil go.
back to bed and sleep.

STEWART: Here's one
suggestion, For. a month or
two, spend a little. time and
effort rearranging “your
responsibilities so they: fit in
to’your: being ‘a late sleeper.
Where does it say you should~
arise at a certain time, “like
everyone else?”

You don’t like that idea?
Well, short of that, I hardly
know what to Suggest until
you come to the point where
you. WANT. to get up. I

- assume you havea degree of

‘faith in those hypnotic tapes.
Yet you do not-‘have a single
one on. the “habit” of

from some men present. She
was upset and left.

When she: complained to
me about her treatment I
asked her to model the suit. I
could see why the men were
smiggering. She may as well
have arrived at the party
nude. I told her that clothes
comvey a message | about
yourself and if she dressed
Hike a whore she shouldn't be
upset to be treated like one.
Now she won't speak to me.

. Freelance Counsellor Hayden Stewart ma y be reached at 261-6242
for appointments for individual, famil
Office in the International Plaza Hotel ¢
convenience of North Shore residents.

handling this in a mature
manner?

STEWART: It seems to me
that you are showing signs of
maturity in getting
professional help when you
feol you need it. Recognizing
that in “getting yourself
together” you are con-
tributing to the possibilities
of your having good relation-
ships, is another sign of
maturity. Your attitude
toward goals and getting
your life in order, ctc., are
signs of maturity. You feel
like you are making progress
and that, for you, is far, far
more important than your
interest in what I think about
it or what others think. You
say, “pcople keep telling
mc....”, and, you ask of me,
“Do you feel | am handling

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ao

sleeping i in! Why?- ‘Could: it * four alarm. clocks and they

be-that so. far, you don't. want do nothing for you; you have
to run across something that even assigned: ‘some. blame —
might work for-you? Imorder and say, “my. Subconscious

to feel as comfortable.as you
can with your. decision to be
a late-sleeper, are you telling

makes mé return ‘to. bed.”
You Tet ‘me ‘down badly by
failing: t6:add Flip: Wilson's
famous one-liner, “The devil
difficult your “case” is? Are made me doit.”

you trying to get us to ad- ‘

mire your brave efforts to If you don’t want to get up
get up early, no matter how — sleep!

hard it is for you, while at But, if. you become
the same time you don’t unhappy enough with that
teally want to get up early. arrangement and begin: ‘to.
and have pretty well decided see that you really do want

against it? You are telling us to get up, then you'll find
you have worked on your you have all sorts of help in

“self-image” and that hasn’t doing what you have been

helped; you "ve used “auto- saying is impossible for you.

suggestion. tapes” and they You can do it — if and when

have failed you; you’ve used you want to, for real.

. _
te 1 ae vy
reat ay}

Derek London is pleased
to announce
the appointment of
Avril Orr
as artistic stylist to
his hair design team

r

reg 4 a eN

Lege eee t eh
- 4
STEWART: Your : Mdetter
appears above, exactly “a
you wrote it and I'm afraid I
ean't make sense out of it.
Perhaps you had better
acquaint yourself with the
meanings of such wards as
‘expose, ‘ hips,” ‘genital area,’
and -even ‘centre of the

body.’

The thing that comes clear
to me is that your sister wore
a skimpy swim suit which
upset you. You told her that
if she “dressed like a whore”
she should expect to be
treated like one. That part of
your letter was clear, but
why did you write it? Did
‘you want support in your
attitude?

Why do women complain
about men thinking of them
as sex objects and then dress
in such a manner that men
can’t help but think of them
im that way? Don't you think
if a woman exposes herself
she shouldn't blame men for
reacting? What's a woman
exposing the genital area for,
if she doesn’t want a man to
think of sex? I think my
sister is asking for ‘trouble,
don’t you? From a brother
trying to be truthful.

626 Seymour St. | : &
Vancouver
684-5905

or group counselling. His

this in a mature manner?”
Perhaps you have already
reached a level of maturity
that will allow you to give
more credence to what YOU
feel about your growth and
your maturity.

One additional comment.
Please don’t wait until you
are “a totally together
person” before you have a
date. Growing in maturity is
the thing. Arriving at full
maturity probably never
happens. So, while you are
on your wise and joyful trip
toward increasing maturity.
for goodness sake, have a lot
of natural fun too. It doesn't
hold you up one little whit.

Pick Up And
Pitch-in

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